My mum is taking me to the doctors for an eating disorder?

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My mum is taking me to the doctors for an 'eating disorder'. I do skip meals and try to eat as little calories as possible but the thing is, I put loads of weight on during exams. This summer I started trying to loose it and now she is going too far saying it's an eating disorder. Now I'm embarrassed because I'm around 5'4/5 and I weigh about 8 stone. I look a bit chubby in all honesty, and sometimes I binge. Other days I starve or eat as little as possible. I have tried to make myself sick but it doesn't usually work. I don't really know what they will do because by no means am I underweight or in any danger, I'm clinically a healthy weight, my BMI is healthy, I don't abuse laxatives etc. it's not a proper eating disorder, other people truly suffer. I'm embarrassed to get help. What will they do?

1 like, 8 replies

8 Replies

  • Posted

    An eating disorder isn't really about what you do eat or don't eat,its about your mentality toward food generally. You will probably be offered cbt therapy, but then only if you want it. If you don't think there's a problem and think things are OK,its just wasting everyone's time by going to see about it forcibly. Your Dr to be honest won't try to convince you of anything, of you don't think things need to change then they wont
  • Posted

    And if your weight is within a reasonable range,they will be inclined to do very little also
  • Posted

    I sarted of like this losing a bit of weight but then my thoughts against food changed and i was scraed of eating to many calories and eating out (big meals) i was then all off a suden controling my day around what i was to eat and what time. u sound like you may be developing an eating disorder so listen to your mum and go for the appointment. you may be offered cbt which will help the way you fell towards food so take it as the quiker you start it the less likely you will develop an eating disorder
  • Posted

    Hi - some of the comments on here are right.

    You can't be forced treatment at this stage and unfortunately currently due to the state of mental health provision finding help is a challenge.

    But you must remember that your mum is right to be worried. Something has caused abnormal eating patterns (even if it is not an eating disorder). Early intervention in eating disorders (early treatment) means your chances of recovery and full recovery are significantly improved than in someone who has to wait and wait.

    Second you should not feel like you are wasting someone's time or are not ill enough. That's the NHS's problem and not yours. If you broke a leg regardless of how severe the pain was or which part of the leg it was you'd still be treated.

    Mental health is a broken mind and needs repairing.

    I wish I had sort help when I was "healthy". I lost so much because I kept trying to justify that I was ok or that no-one would take me seriously.

    As said maybe you don't have a problem but maybe you do and it's important to come to terms with it BEFORE it becomes serious and not after.

    Here fore you.

  • Posted

    Hello everyone thank you all for your replies. It turned out that I actually weighed just under 7 stone, and I'm 5'6. I didn't have a way to measure these at home but clearly my guesses were wrong. The doctor said its anorexia restrictive type but with bulimic tendencies or along those lines. I don't know loads about eating disorders, thank you for your help. X
    • Posted

      are they going to refer you? get help before its to late! i left it now its really hard
    • Posted

      I'm struggling to accept it, I don't think I'm bad. I think I am just receiving outpatient treatment at the minute
    • Posted

      Hi - yes that's really tricky coming to terms with your diagnosis.

      Just look at the positives though.

      1) You don't have to keep it to yourself anymore, you can share it with your mum and explain how you are feeling, especially when you are having a really rubbish day.

      2) Everything can get better, because you are being offered help. You will be offered help to understand why you are feeling how you are feeling, and to really understand yourself much better.

      3) Your doctor sounds like he/she has a real grip on the situation. Many doctors have said it's not serious, or you're wasting my time, or that's not a real problem. Your doctor took you seriously, took the trouble to listen, and is right. It is a real problem and one which you do need support with. So that's another person you can add on your team.

      4) You've just done the hardest bit. Asking for help.

      Have you thought about visiting the b-eat website? There is something known as the recovery club (I can't remember if you said you were under 18, but if you are there are some brilliant resources for under 18s).

      There is also support there for over 18s. The thing about the recovery club is it's a safe space for you to virtually meet with other people in the same boat as you.

      Btw, I noticed you mentioned that you don't know much about eating disorders. I would probably advise you not to do too much reading about them at this stage. Particularly while you're feeling vulnerable.

      The only thing you need to know is that they are extremely dangerous, which as Kirsty said is why it's so important to get help as early as possible. (1 in 5 people die).

      In terms of knowing about eating disorders there are practical things you can do while you are waiting for your treatment to start.

      You can start by setting yourself some short term, medium term and long term goals. Things to keep you motivated. They can be things that are away from food as well. For example a friend of mine found that a behaviour linked to his food was being constantly on the go and never having the opportunity to unwind. His goal was to visit an art gallery for an hour with his phone off just to enjoy that time (as he really enjoyed art!).

      Mine is different, I made it my goal to link sport back in in a healthy way...yesterday I finally made it back to gymnastics, and it was incredible.

      I also have a goal which is around food when I go to Rome in the Autumn.

      The second thing is to keep a food and mood diary.

      This is quite a key thing, as it helps you be aware of your eating patterns and what's going on. For example, I know I get carb cravings a lot around my time of the month. It's my body telling me that I need to increase my energy levels because it's preparing me in the anticipation of a fertilised egg and subsequent foetus. When that doesn't happen then my appetite returns to the norm.

      Knowing other patterns also depend on sleep, and what I have eaten during the day e.g. if I haven't had a particularly carb heavy lunch then I will end up snacking more in the afternoon. Again this is a natural reaction to your body being deprived.

      Knowing when your energy levels are most likely to dip, and recognising this really helps but if it was that straightforward then we'd all be recovered quickly.

      Hence the mood part in the diary. How are you feeling when you eat? Did you binge for a particular reason? Did you eat a meal because you were feeling relaxed? Did eating something make you feel sad/overwhelmingly anxious? Why? Where is the discomfort, and so on? These are all important thoughts which you can start to recognise and work with and which will feel awful at first, but will help you as you start your journey on recovery. It's important to talk about them too. Like I hate x because it hurts here...a good therapist will be able to work through this with you.

      Hope that helps!


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