Nearly 9 wks on citroplam 20mg still not better

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Hi

I really need some reassurance I will be 9 weeks on 20mg of cit on Monday coming and I still feel really depressed, I started off having anxiety and panic attacks the meds seem to have helped with that but now I just feel despair just soo sad, I am getting out doing my shopping bringin kids to school doing everything o used to but feels like something has died inside of me have no enjoyment r feel any excitement just dread the nxt day, I dnt know what to do my doc has given me a prescription for 30mg but I keep putting it off has I had horrible side effects wen I first started and I dnt think I cld handle all that again.. I was on 30mg 6 years ago and it did work for me can't remember how long it took and I eventually weaned myself off about 9 months ago, maybe I am immune to cit now just worrying about everything, has anyone any advice please xx

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16 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi nicola

    I stayed on 20 for several weeks and although it helped a bit I knew I was still unwell. Although cit can take ages and ages to kick in, I got to the point where I could not wait and continue to feel so unwell. I was scared to go up to 30 but it has made a huge difference. I did get weepy and a little nauseous for the first few days of the increase but nothing like the range of horrendous side effects I got when I first started citalopram. I think you have waited long enough on the twenty and would start taking your thirty. I imagine it must be very hard for you especially with a young family. I really think you will benefit from the increase xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Lorraine

      Thank you so much for your reply I really appreciate it, this is just the worst feeling in the world I just feel as if I am existing and it is very hard with the kids cause u feel guilty I can't enjoy them.. I think you are right I wldnt even mind side effects if I knew it was going to work, how long after srarting the 30mg did u feel the benefits? Thank you again x

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    • Posted

      Bless you nicola

      I find it hard to look after myself with this illness. I don't know how you are managing with all your responsibilities too. I promise you the side effects you get on the increase will not be severe as when you first started. I promise you the increase will make you feel a whole lot better and with me it was on the second day! I was so dreading side effects again but it isn't as bad as you may think.

      Please let me know how you get on xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Lorraine

      The side effects are what is putting me off upping dose but I think it's the only option now

      Thank you so much for your reply , I will keep you posted xx

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  • Posted

    Hello Nicola! I am sorry you are going through these challenges with your meds. What I have read through the Internet and my own experience with cit is the more you take it the more you are sleepy and relaxed. It does take several weeks before you noticed these symptoms versus the ones that are upsetting. Your doctor did what was right to increase your meds to control your negative symptoms, you not taking it will not give yourself a chance to relieve the negative symptoms you say you do not want. The choice you can make is to try your meds. They are always trying to improve the meds. Perhaps the meds you took some time ago will be different and improve your symptoms. Good Luck!
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    • Posted

      Hi Michelle

      Thank you so much for your reply, I really appreciate it, you are right I know I need to up the dose just afraid of side effects and if 30mg don't work what then?? Negative thinkin I know

      Thanks again x

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    • Posted

      Hi Nicola! I understand your fear all to well. But fear is preconceived. Until it happens then you have the right to take another action. Side effects of any medication is always there. It will also be the lesser of the negative symptoms we would want. Side effects come and go and are lesser or greater in severity as you pass through the time of taking any medication. I read on the Internet there other meds than cit. Perhaps you and your doctor could consider them. As far as cit dosage is referred to, the dosages I read on the Internet are 10, 20, 30 and 40 mg. I wish you all the luck in working this out. Its tough we are having these changes, but God will see us through it all!
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  • Posted

    Hi Nicola

    I am exactly the same as you, I started having anxiety and panic attacks 8 years ago and my dr prescribed me 30mg of citlaopram and I can't remember how long the took to work hu they clearly did, I then had to come Off them to have my children but I had a little boy 17 weeks ago and my anxiety came back worse than ever 2 weeks ago. I am on day 16 of taking 20mg of cit again and beta blockers to stop my heart racing, some days I manage to get through the day others are just awful, I have taken my daughter to school once in 2 weeks and it was a dreadful experience for me I couldn't leave quick enough which I found so weird as I loved taking her to school and meeting the other mummies now I don't want anyone to speak to me I case I cry!!!!!

    I know I will make progress but the question is when, it was successful before I'm just hoping it's as successful this time

    Don't worry you are not alone in any of this and please keep on in this forum it really is great to chat to everyone as we are all having a hard time and going through it together xx

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    • Posted

      Hi sparkly

      Thank you for your reply, I really appreciate it, congrats on the Birth of ur baby, I got postnatal depression after my little girl was born 6 1/2 years ago and was put on cit, it did work eventually aswel can't remember how long it took, just so worried it wnt work this time, I know exactly what you mean about not wanting to talk to other mothers at school I to was the same at the start, that has eased now it's just the horrible empty dread feeling now that hopefully by increasing meds might help with, I will keep you posted , I hope things improve for you sn it is early days for you even though I know every day is torture the past two months has been he'll just want it to end now xx

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  • Posted

    Dear Nicola don't give up...look up my story when u get a chance....I took 20 mgs for 4 weeks and I had some of the side effects...I was about to call it quits because I felt the same..hopeless..empty inside..no happiness...the Dr increased to 25 and send me Ativan for my Anxiety when I have it or just 1 at bed. I also switched my Celexa to before bed..never had a side effect again. I take both pills at night and sleep like a baby. I wake-up fine. Don't get me wrong I'm still a long roads away...I'm in a apt 24/7 because I lost my car so all I can do is think...trying to see how I can get a car and restart my life over again. For the sake of my kids who already lost one parent. Hang in there.

    Much Love

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    • Posted

      Hi IntelBrat,

      Thank you for your reply i very much appreciate it, I looked your story up and you really have had it very tough you are obviously a very strong person ...

      How many weeks are you on your medication? ? and do you feel any improvement? This forum really helps me thanks again xxx

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    • Posted

      Your welcome..I started taking Celexa on the first week of October...and he also gave me buspar which I have discontinued because I felt it was making my Anxiety worst. My isolation doesn't help but I do feel 70% better..I have bad days but the Ativan really helps. I feel that if I were out there in the world working and with a car I would be awesome...the worst part of this for me is feeling like i want to move on because i feel better but I can't.

      Just hold on you will be ok....xoxo

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  • Posted

    Good Morning Nicola,

    Yep, Cita takes as long as it takes, but it is one of the better "sticking plasters for the brain" and well worth the wait. I started on 10mg nearly a year ago and gradually raised by 10mg over the following months so that by March this year I was on 40mg.

    I was very frightened about taking just 10mg, let alone 20mg, or more, when I started. However, there are a few factors that helped, my Dr is amazing and knows a lot about our and other such mental issues, I also had an understanding girlfriend (now Fiancee) who knew diddlysquat about such matters, but decided to get involved be my home nurse and read the posts here. Which brings me to the important matter of this forum and I don't think anyone can over state the importance and wonderful feeling of being here and how much it helps with our recovery. One time you are crying for help, the next, you are hearing others cry and help them!

    In the early days of my (work related stress) illness, being signed unfit for work and taking Cita for the first time, I was somewhere I had never been before. It was fuzzy, hazey, I felt sick and I had some side effects that I could have done without, but I stuck with it - how? Just did! I let go and let everything happen and would be found wrapped up in a duvet downstairs not wanting or being able to do anything. My Dr and the amazing friemds here helped me through, you cannot do anything but let go and go with it. Not all of us get the same side effects, nor the same intensity either, what is lucky for some ain't for others, that's just the way it goes. I never thought that I had anxiety, for example, then here I was advised that Cita causes anxiety to be able to treat it, possibly panic attacks and shortness of breath are included too. Anyway, I gradually came through, not that I can remember how long it took as everything was all new to me and seemed to be hitting me at once. Like I said, I took advice here and just went with it because, when I was concerned about anything or thoughts came to me I came here and posted these (no matter how silly I felt some were) and I got all the support, advice and answers I needed.

    There was and still is, one more matter I dealt with and that was me! Through all the crap I managed to decide to do my part in my own recovery. Afterall, my Dr, my Fiancee, a few friends (see below), my daughter and all the lovely people here, even those that don't get it quite right all helped me so, I thought I should try (and it was hard) to do something for myself. I have changed my lifestyle, gave up smoking, cut out daily drinking (to get by) and now have the odd bottle of ale at weekends and we go out perhaps once a month to catch up. I am now vegetarian (which was a challange, but one I enjoy as I love cooking - and I ain't  talking "nut roasts" possibly Yuk, but definitely boring!) which has helped my body and mind become fitter over the months, especially as I had a couple of actual health issues that needed hospital treatment and an op. Of course, when I started last year I did go through a period of thinking there was different things wrong with, but the Dr put me through tests etc, and proved I was ok! There was also a period of multiple vivid dreams that I went through however, I was advised here, to try changing when I took my dose, which I did. Initially I took it in the morning which I gradually moved up to tea time (as it was not good for me during the day) so when advised to move it up to just before bed time was not a major problem. I found, for me, taking it then meant it worked while I was asleep and the dreams dropped to perhaps just one a night. That was much better!

    Friends! Interesting how I found out that at least 50% of those friends I called "aquaintaces" were just that and nothing more. My true friends and that other 50%, even if they didn't understand what I was going through, stuck by me. In fact I have found out that there are many that have or are suffering from modern day issues and I didn't know. So, definitely, nothing to be ashamed or worried about.

    Finally, I removed myself from the thing that made me ill in the first place - work! I am now semi retired at 58, not signed fit for work yet and when I do I'll get a little part time job. We have and are managing, the lifestyle change has helped a lot, but a little extra cash will always come in handy.

    So, "Welcome to the Club" keep posting, keep reading and keep believing things will, eventually, get better and don't rush anything!

    Best Regards,

    david

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    • Posted

      Wow brilliant post David! Reading through was inspirational and your post will help many of us here. It's definitely helped me this morning. It's given me renewed hope xxx
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    • Posted

      Hi David,

      Thank you very much for your very inspiring reply, it really helps to know I am not the only one who feels this bad because in my mind I think I am only person who ever felt this pain inside and no enjoyment in any part of my life!! and complete fear!! I hope I will recover like you and be able to help others who suffer with this nightmare x

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    • Posted

      Good Morning Nicola,

      We are not alone! Funny, everyone looks to the stars and wonders if we are when someone near by is. Whatever happens keep the positivity levels up!

      Regards,

      David

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