need help

Posted , 7 users are following.

hi all i am 43 and it has just been confirmed that i am deffinatally going through the menopause. i am not copeing with this well at all. it is completally unexpected and i am completaly devastated. i have two beautifull children that i am extreamally proud off so not wanting any more children, but this has come as a shock to me. i have a doctors appointment in two weeks but that seems like a lifetime away. i am struggleing big time with this and need help to cope. i know it comes to us all but i was not prepaird for this att all. any help and advice extreamally greatfull.i normally turn to my mum for help, compfort or advice but as she died last year dont't have her to turn feel completally alone. please HELP as i am strugleing big time thank you

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18 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Allison

    whats going on exactly? What are your symptoms? Have you seen a doctor?

    How can I help?

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  • Posted


    theres plenty of supplements that ease symptoms, I can help you with what they are..

    lots of nice ladies on here too, so let us know whats happening, how your symptoms are affecting you exactly ..

    jay x

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  • Posted

    Hi Ali,

              I know exactly what you mean, it just comes from nowhere (well so it seems). Dreadful time for a woman. This site is great, you'll get superb support on here, and advice to suggest things which will help you. Vitamins, exercise (i personally think this helps, I realise you don't feel like it) but I am persevering because I know that it energises the body and mind, I can't do what I did before which is so frustrating so currently I use Mr Motivators video. I am so sorry about your Mum, take care of YOURSELF at this time, do things you like, I am thinking about you. We will try to help you get through this wink

                                                                                         Mrs Merm

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  • Posted

    hi all thank you for your replies.

    at this time the physical symptoms are not extream, head aches are getting progressively worse, afew aches and pains in alsorts of different places. not realy sure what to expect. i have googled it but not realy much from real people. it all seems very generic and seems to me that its more than likely written by a men who has no idea how emotional and physical affects of the menopause affects a woman.

    i do have another appointment with a female doctor in a couple of weeks which seems like a lifetime away. i'll try the vitamins. which ones should i get multi with or without iron?

    right now i dont know what to expect, i know every woman is different and what happens to one person won't necessarily happen to the next. its just a scary time. the worst thing for me right now is straingly the emotional side of it, i think im still in shock over the whole thing. i'm completally devastated. im sure you all have felt the same as i do so don't need to tell you how i'm feeling and all the irational thoughts thats running around inside my head. gggrrr. i do exercise quite a bit but dont realy feel like it now just want to lock myself away untill its all over.

    thank you for your support

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  • Posted

    Hello Alison ,I'm sorry your mum has passed.i was 31 when my mum died ,hit my menopause at 48 ,I understand how you need your mum ,this is a confusing time ,felt lost when mine began ,

     looking back I'd now wished I'd spoken to my mums sisters ,but i was away from my home town ,that was a big mistake not asking them about my mum and her menopause .

     Hope you get answers ,do say what they are .once known the help will be forth coming .Lots on site are in same boat.xx

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  • Posted

    Hi there, likewise, I am 44 and suddenly felt really weird two weeks ago.  Spaced out, forgetful, anxious.  Just weird.  Doctor hasn't confirmed it's perimenopause as I have a previous oestrogen problem, but reading entries on this site ang general googling, I reckon it probably is.  I understand how you are feeling, the realisation of getting older is very daunting. You might want to think about some kind of therapy if you think that might work for you.  But like many others, I have found great comfort in the support from this group, as I am sure you will too.  Hang on in there xxx
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  • Posted

    thank you Marlene and bubbins.

    yes i have found compfort in you all. i think the shock is starting to were off a bit now. i'v had a good old fashoned bottle of vodka a big bar of chocolate and a B***** good cry. which i think i realy needed.

    i have no one around me that i feel that i could talk to about this.  so i am extreamly happy that i stumbled upon this sight as i know if i need to vent i can do it on here and would be completally understood and not judged for it as we are all going through the same thoughts and feelings. well that is if thats allowed. am i allowed to have a rant and vent on here if i need to???

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    • Posted

      Rant and vent as much as you want ,we've all done that still do.hope you've had good look through the post,that helps you get perspective on things,that's there's loads of females feeling exactly the same,

         Look up om this meno site Jay on site put up 67 symptoms  to menopause ,gob smacking read ,think it was just couple weeks ago 

        Come back anytime ,were always around okay 

        Go get good nights sleep.xxxxxGod bless 

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    • Posted

      Brain fog was on the list Jay ,Hee Hee .you are bad on the 67 .

         Hope your mouths better ,weather was hot here today could have been Spain .Midnight here ,2 .30 in Spain 

          Soon see what the Scots want ,won't ever be the same again between us even if it's a No vote.Brits got long memories .Couldnt see why a Scot living this side of the border didn't get a vote ,but a non Scot in Scotland could .Mind boggles ,don't call that fair playing field ,think that Salmon thought they'd come back with a no vote .ah well leave them to it now ,whatever the outcome ..xxxxx

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    • Posted

      hi marlene 

      good morning 😊

      laughing this morning... What i was trying to say..

      if ladies want to find the symptoms of menopause the actual discussion is

      named 66 symptoms of menopause ( the main heading) 

      have a good day marlene 😃

      jay xx

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    • Posted

      Hi Jay hope Alison had good read on those symptoms ,another on this road ,but she will feel lot clearer from reading it .Its what I do on my TT site ,there a mind of info on tinnitus and the probs we get from that condition .Godsend they've been for me since finding that site .

        So anyone with meno Tinnitus go look on Tinnitustalk

        Forget what it's like to feeling normal .How many on these sites saying this self same thing .

        Weather here Jay is low in pressure ,not good for ones allergies .

        See Scotland got the No vote ,won't forget that Salmond bloke or his side kick whatever her name ,he looks sly ,a right snake for Scotland .My opinion .xxx

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