New Gyn/ not Happy, Your opinion?

Posted , 16 users are following.

Okay LS Friends, I need your council. You may remember my mentioning that my  Gyn took six biopsies and then left the practice 3 days later, before I had my results. I went on my planned vacation with no treatment plan, treated myself homeopathically with Emuaid Maxx and Emuaid, joined your forum, changed my diet and got things under control. Got home 5 weeks later and went to her partner who was left in the old office. I was not thrilled that it was a man, but he seemed nice, read my test results, seeemed knowledgable about LS, discussed diet changes, other possible treatments including the laser, prescribed Clob, wanted to test my hormone levels and thyroid, etc. and asked to examine me to eatablish a baseline. I finally said okay and he examined me and his nurse was present as he took a picture with his cell phone, downloaded it into my chart and deleted it from his phone. He said that woman Dr tend to codfle their patients and are too emotional, so maybe a male Dr would be better for me. I had complained about clitoral pain, so right before I left he said to tell my husband we had homework to do ( oral sex) and tell him next time if it hurt at all. 

I went back a month later to get the results of my blood tests and all was normal except low testosterone, so he prescribed a cream to slowly raise the level.  His nurse said he would not be examining me because “ the Dr is sure his treatment is working fine”?? At the end of the appointment I told him I had two areas of concern. 1 was my rt labia was now significantly smaller than my left. He said “ how do you mnow it wasn’t always like that” alot of women have two different sized feet and breasts, maybe your labia is too” I replied that I have been inserting tampons since 8th grade and they were def. not like that before. Then he said “ so what, what do you need them for? They serve no purpose. Do you think your husband cares if you hv them? All he cares about is a warm , wet hole to put it in. That’s all men want- a warm, wet hole. You got one of those right?” I was flabbergasted and didn’t even ask my second question. I went put to the front desk to make a 5- week appt. but the more I thought about the more upset I got! I felt objectified and realizedc a Dr should NEVER talk to a patient that way and a MAN should NEVER talk to a woman that way.  I finally told my husband a few days later and he was so angry and wanted to punch him in the nose! I made an appointment with a different female Dr, had my records transferred and cancelled my appt. with him. 

Am I over- reacting? Am I too sensitive due to this topic or is this Dr out of bounds??? Your thoughts?? 

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  • Posted

    So maybe draw him a picture of why a labia matters; how about " You have 2 holes to breathe through so what if your nose disappeared? Your wife probably doesn't care about your nose anyway. Would you you REALLY need a nose?"

    He's so clueless and my heart really goes out to you.

  • Posted

    Hi I don’t normally post on here much but felt I had to reply to you Karen .. I’m in Scotland and we tend as a nation to put up and shut up rather than sue. ..but my God the way that Dr spoke to you is quite frankly shocking !!! It’s totally unacceptable and his age has nothing to do with it. Arrogance does. I’m pleased to hear you intend to report him... more power to you !! 

    Also ... we are all allowed an opinion but to have fellow female sufferers on here argue about legal process is ... to be totally blunt ... disappointing.  As if we don’t have enough to suffer with this hellish condition ... let’s all stand together and continue to discover ... help... and advise 

    Stand tall Karen you were not over reacting so don’t doubt your inbuilt gut feelings ... they are NEVER wrong 

    Best wishes to you from Bonnie Scotland 

    • Posted

      just a short comment OkPeeps..... I wasn't making a legal argument - that is my whole point - I have been making a compassionate humanitarian, spiritual growth process plea - for all concerned.      

    • Posted

      Greetings OKpeeps! 

      To you and all the wonderful responders, I just want to go on record as saying I NEVER mentioned taking legal action so I’m not sure where all the controversy came from?? I was merely asking everyone’s opinion on if I was over- reacting and if you supported my leaving his care/ practice. 

      I do intend to write him a letter outlining why I peft his care and I may still file a complaint with the Texas State medical Board, but not to seek legal action against him, but to hv it noted in his certification records if/ when it happens again,  to establish a pattern of behavior. 

      As a Board- Certified Therapist myself I am held to a very strict code of Ethics and I expect the same from my counterparts. 

      I think we, the USA, as a countey are sue happy and that was never my intention. 

    • Posted

      Karen - I think you are doing the right thing to leave his care and to explain your reasons why. I also think his attitude should be reported to the medical board for the reasons you outline, not to try and lose him his job but as Nancy is saying to try and educate him and others in his profession. There should be a consequence to him for his inappropriate language.
  • Posted

    Karen, Yeah, I dont think he should lose his job over this, which might happen if you go ahead with it.  I would think a letter to him should be enough.  People say daft things at times, make blunders,  and remember you thought he was wonderful on your first visit.

    I wanted to ask you something, you said the following..

     'His nurse said he would not be examining me because “ the Dr is sure his treatment is working fine”??

    were you disappointed that he didn't examine you and felt that this was yet another failure on his part, because honestly I dont see anything wrong with him not examining you again..maybe your anxiety over your LS made you feel like he was being neglectful...dunno but something else to think on.

    I would sleep on it.

     

    • Posted

      Hi Guppy, There are two parameyers at play here, he could hv been seem as neglectful for not checking the disease progress after a month, but the issue at hand was hos unprofessional / inapprpriate conduct with regard to the sexually explicit comments. 

      I never said I wanted to persue legal action, I do mot want to ruin his livelihood, but I do think he needs to be aware of his misguided comments and avoid them in the future. 

  • Posted

    Karen , NO you are not over reacting!!!! I went to a male Dr. for a bad yeast infection and also that i had trouble having sex cause it hurt, and he too just when he walked in really loud said " so you want to have sex Do YOU? " like if thats all i wanted...made me feel so low and embaressed ..didnt go back to him...i like woman Drs. better...but like i say if they dont have this they dont care....what do you think of the cell stem surgery...i hope you are feeling better...im glad your husband has your back....right now i have like a little cut and its bothering me some but the Emuaid is really helping...i cant wait to go see the vulva specialist and see what she sees and how i am doing ..i have been using the olivie oil for moister but i didnt put it on more often and i was up and down real busy and thats why i think i got dry and i got cut...this is a real nitghtmare..all the time and it doesnt go away...i just pray...hope you a good janie

    • Posted

      Hi Jane, I just wanted to mention that the cuts you are talking about have nothing to do with dryness.  The 'paper cuts' are an unfortunate symptom of LS and most of us get them at some time or other.  I tend to get them in the crack of my butt.  Just thought I would mention it.

    • Posted

      I didn't know that Guppy that the cuts in the crack were LS.  I used to put Gold's Medicated Cornstarch Powder there.  Helped. When I got that I think my LS was in remission on my lady parts.  

  • Posted

    Karen,

    I don't feel you're overreacting at all! This doctor has said some extremely inappropriate things to you and in my opinion, should be reported, if you feel you want to. He's been rude, insensitive and unprofessional. If he talks to patients like that on a regular basis perhaps he shouldn't be practicing medicine.

    If you're in the UK you can report him, I think via the GMC.

    You're wise to switch to someone else.

    • Posted

      I went back to my forner, fale Gyn, talked to her about it all. She said age can’t twll me what to do, but she is on the peer review board and they do investigate every report. She said he will not lose his practice, one complaint would never do that- but it may make him think before he speaks again. I will also write him a personal letter explaining why I left, why I felt uncomfortable and ask him how  he would feel if it had been his wife, daughter or granddaughter? I don’t think he would hv spoken that way to them....

      I hv an appt with a Nationally known vulvodyna Clinic March 28, 2019.... soonest appt I could get! Going to hv some furtger endocrine testing And food allergy testing to get to the root of WHY I got  LS. 

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