New man on the forum

Posted , 6 users are following.

Hello all

Just thought I would introduce myself, I’m Richard aged 38 married with 3 kids and seem to be one of the few men on this forum, but I have yet to be diagnosed with Fibro or M.E.

It started in June this year after a RTA, I went to the docs after the terrible pains in my limbs wouldn’t go, feeling tired and achy, depressed. The doc ran loads of blood tests and I was diagnosed with Underactive thyroid and high cholesterol.

I was a bit shocked at this because I’d never had anything wrong with me before, but I looked it up and thought, oh well sounds like the pills will sort me out and I’ll go back to living a normal life. But I don’t seem to be getting any better, in fact I would say I’m now worse.

I’m currently on all sorts of meds which include the usual, Levothyroxine, Tramadol, Amitriptyline and Simvastatin for my cholesterol. It’s a wonder I don’t rattle when I walk! (That’s when I can walk).

My doctor now seems to think I have Fibromyalgia or M.E, but like many on this site I’m having to go through all the tests, which seems to take time. The docs been really good and does seem to have some knowledge and understanding of this condition, after all I’d never even heard of it until he said that he suspected that’s what was wrong with me.

Looking back before the RTA, I had been under a great deal of stress with work and personal life but being wrapped up in it all, I think the adrenalin must have kept me going. I can now see that I already had some of the symptoms, feeling low, tiredness all the time, lethargic, loss of memory, emotional (I hate to admit this but I could cry at the most stupid things)

I just feel rubbish all the time, my legs and arms are the worse, aching constantly and I’m unable to sleep properly due to the pain being so severe that I can’t get comfortable. I can’t walk for more than 20 metres without having to stop and rest.

To date I am now waiting for an appointment to see a rheumatologist after being discharged from Physiotherapy and seeing at Orthopaedic surgeon who both said that I needed to see a rheumatologist and that they suspect Fybro.

I can’t believe how my life has been turned upside down in such a short period of time, 12 months ago and had lots going for me and was really active with walking my 2 dogs and running a paranormal group had a great job and family life, now all my spare time is sat feeling sorry for myself in pain and tired.

Work has been really good with me and understand that I can’t get up sometimes in the morning so have allowed me to work flexi time to fit in when I feel well and have made loads of adjustments for me so I can carry on working.

My poor wife has been great and understands that I feel rubbish and knows when I’m having a really bad day. However the worse thing is that I feel such a fraud sometimes. I seem to have bad days, then I have what I call wave days, these are days when I’m up and down. One minute I feel fine and think thank god I’m cured, (you know like just after a cold) but then the next minute I’m in great pain again.

I seem to suffer from the pain in my legs constantly which effects my walking, but I feel worse when it’s in my arms too, I can’t even hold the phone to my head on my bad days, all I want to do is just lay down. I then get depressed which seems to make it worse, so I end up going to bed and writing the day off as a bad one.

Anyhow, I’ll sign off for now has I seemed to have gone on a bit, just glad to know that there are people who understand how I feel.

Richard

0 likes, 113 replies

113 Replies

Next
  • Posted

    Hi Richard,

    Welcome to the fibro group. We try to help each other on our up and down days, Tess, Linda, Lindy, Di and Ses are all great supportive people to know. I'm Lizzy I have been diagnosed with fibro since Feb and I also have Lupus and an overactive thyroid.

    Well I hope you wake up to a good day today.

    I have been told the whole key to controlling this illness is to, avoid stress, pace yourself so that you don't do too much on your good days and gentle exercise. But of course it deosn't really happen like that, when you feel good you want to do lots and at other times you just have to do it even though you know it will make you bad.

    Sometimes our families don't always understand what we are going through which is why this is such a good place to come too.

    Take care.

    Lizzy

  • Posted

    welcome richard

    hey dont be shy to come on here cause ur a man, a guy i know from a while back has also got fibro so it does effect men to.

    im di, im married 26yrs.. 3 kids and suffer fbro, arthitis in knees, and in april had a very serous blood clot on my main artery on my lungs, so i am suffering more with the fibro at the moment.. like u have days where i wake up and think hey i feel ok..( please say this has gone) and by lunch time im back in bed as the pain has come on... im morphine patches and oral morphine for break through pain, amitypline 20mg. warfrin, gabapentine and paracetomal... life is tough and depression is hard to.. anyway i have introduced myself.. all the girls on this forum are very helpful, we all come on.. rant on about how we feel.. or tell nice stories of what we have achieved.. so keep popping on it will nice to speak wth u.

    to lizzy, linda, lindy,tess, ses, hope u all are well, at least the sun is out today so hope ur feeling bright in ur mood... gentle hugs. xxx

  • Posted

    Hi Richard,

    Welcom, like Lizzy and Di have said we are a friendly bunch on here, so just because you`re a man don`t be afraid of all us girls! I`m Linda 57yrs married, two grown up kids (still at home!) I`m my husband`s carer which is tough sometimes. Had to give up work just over a year ago as it was all too much. Like most of us when I have a good day I think this thing has gone away and feel a fraud but then it comes back with a vengeance and I`m back to square one.

    Chat again soon

    Linda

  • Posted

    Wow, thanks everyone for the welcome, I thought it was going to be one of those sites where no one replied for weeks, and look I got 3 in less that 24 hours!!!

    I've not had too bad of a day today! just ache all over, I hate it, I feel like I've run a marathon and not slept for days, even though I've not done anything over the weekend apart from sit and watch TV and sleep.

    I used to do all sorts and be going to different places, I loved the weekends, now I'm just so tired by Friday that I can't face doing anything over the weekend.

    I'm trying to keep working while ever I can, because I find I can cope with the pain better while I'm there, but some days it's just awful and I have to go home to lay down. Just hope that they'll always be this understanding, I can't afford to stop work because the mortgage is huge! This then causes me stress and the whole cycle starts again...

    The most difficult thing I'm having to get to grips with is that there doesn't seem to be a cure for it or no end to it. How do you cope with that knowing that you won't get better, I'm sure I'm in complete denyel over it all. I just keep thinking that this isn't happening to me and I've just got a bug or something..

    Look forward to talking some more.

    Richard

  • Posted

    Hi Richard,

    I know I am in denyel and so much so I am paying to see a specialist. The thought of spending the rest of my life like this is just a horrific thought for me especially as I have already got one life time auto immune disease to deal with.

    In a desperate attempt to get control of my life I asked my Gp to up my Dosulepin which is the same group as Amitriptyline to a dose that helps with anxiety & depression so I am now on 100mg rather than 25mg a night and my life has improved drasticly. Most of the pain has gone and my sleep is much improved. The days are much improved. I had to break the cycle.

    So is everyone enjoying the end of the summer? Did think about camping next weekend but then decided a family BBQ weather permitting was a much better idea. Less work. My eldest is going back to Uni in 2 weeks she has found a nice house to live in. My 2nd daughter collects her GCSE results on Thursday and has at long last agreed to go to the 6th form college we picked. What a relief. My son starts his GCSE when he goes back and my youngest will be in year 8. Its so hetic here in term time.The middle 2 want to take there Grade 8 music exams I have tried to put them off because its so stressfull.

    Take care all.

    Lizzy

  • Posted

    Hi Richard

    I am Tess and was told I had fibro last June but had been going backwards and forwards to the doctor for about seven or eight years with different things wrong with me. Was a relief to finally find out what I had.

    Then it came down to trying to live with it and along with all the other things that came with it. I take ampytripline in the evening and find that helps a little with the sleep. Some nights it doesn't seem to work. I also take coproxomol for the pain when I need it. I was sent to see a physio

    for about five sessions and he gave me some light exercises to do. I did think at first how was I going to do them. I have been doing them everyday apart from when we go away in our motorhome as not enough room lol. I do feel that they definately help with the pain and give me more energy. While I am busy during the day forget about the pain. Its only when I sit down and stop and have a cuppa the pain niggles me. It always seem worse first thing in the morning and last thing at night.

    I think when you are first told we all go in denial. I do wake up most days though feeling as if I haven't slept still and can't get going until after I have done the exercises and had a shower to loosen my muscles and wake me up. Just try not to look to far ahead and take one day at a time. I know it is not easy and think it is harder for yourself as like you say you worry about the mortgage. Normally the mans wage is higher than the womans in most cases and you need to try and work. I think it is good you are going to work as sometimes it can take the mind of the pain. There are days when I get really bad headaches and can't seem to function properly.

    Do keep coming on the site as men near the support as much as us women. Maybe more men will follow suit and come on and talk to you and us as well.

    Hope things do get better for you soon and you can find a way to deal with it on a daily basis.

    Linda, Lizy & Di good to see you all on and hope you are also doing ok.

    Tess

  • Posted

    Hi Richard

    Left a bit off my posting. Forgot to say I am married with 5 children, 2 grand daughters Molly and Sophie. I am 53 and also have arthritis and trouble with thyroid. Don't how mind came about but did have thyroid cancer in 1997 and had two had to operations one to remove my thyroid.

    Don't know whether the trauma of that set it off but never had it before my cancer.

    Well hope you get a good day tomorrow.

    Tess

  • Posted

    [quote:63ee4809c2=\"Squires\"]Hi Richard

    I am Tess and was told I had fibro last June but had been going backwards and forwards to the doctor for about seven or eight years with different things wrong with me. Was a relief to finally find out what I had.

    Then it came down to trying to live with it and along with all the other things that came with it. I take ampytripline in the evening and find that helps a little with the sleep. Some nights it doesn't seem to work. I also take coproxomol for the pain when I need it. I was sent to see a physio

    for about five sessions and he gave me some light exercises to do. I did think at first how was I going to do them. I have been doing them everyday apart from when we go away in our motorhome as not enough room lol. I do feel that they definately help with the pain and give me more energy. While I am busy during the day forget about the pain. Its only when I sit down and stop and have a cuppa the pain niggles me. It always seem worse first thing in the morning and last thing at night.

    I think when you are first told we all go in denial. I do wake up most days though feeling as if I haven't slept still and can't get going until after I have done the exercises and had a shower to loosen my muscles and wake me up. Just try not to look to far ahead and take one day at a time. I know it is not easy and think it is harder for yourself as like you say you worry about the mortgage. Normally the mans wage is higher than the womans in most cases and you need to try and work. I think it is good you are going to work as sometimes it can take the mind of the pain. There are days when I get really bad headaches and can't seem to function properly.

    Do keep coming on the site as men near the support as much as us women. Maybe more men will follow suit and come on and talk to you and us as well.

    Hope things do get better for you soon and you can find a way to deal with it on a daily basis.

    Linda, Lizy & Di good to see you all on and hope you are also doing ok.

    Tess[/quote:63ee4809c2]Thanks for the advice Tess and everyone else for that matter, just been to the docs this evening for my referal to the Rhumatologist, just got to wait for my appointment now!

    With ref to the mortgage, we had lived in a house for a number of years and the mortgage was tiny, only about 18 months ago we decided to sell and move to a bigger house so that we could move up the ladder so that we would be in a better position to buy our retirement bungalow near the sea in a few years time. So we're at the top of our pricing at the minute along with the credit crunch, we've also lost around £45,000 on the price we paid, so selling isn't an option at the minute either.

    I just wish I knew what I know now, the pressure wouldn't be on us as much and perhaps I could have gone down to part time for a while. But I suppose we can't go through life thinking what if! We'd never do anything. It is a massive worry for me though. Just wish I could turn back time and not have moved house, I wouldn't mind but I can't even get upstairs on some days!

    Oh well moan over for now, just hope the pains not too bad tomorrow so I can go to work another day.

    Take care everyone

    Richard

  • Posted

    Hi Richard

    Hope you are feeling not too bad today and manage to get to work. Just pace yourself. :lol:

    I have busy day looking after my two granddaughters aged 5 and 11 months. Does take my mind off the pain though when they are here.

    Take care!

    Tess

  • Posted

    Hi Everyone

    Tess hope you had a good day with your grandchildren and that you didn't get too wet in the storm. Plenty of rain.

    Linda are you feeling any better after you last few weeks?

    Lindy I hope life is treating you well and that you aren't working too hard.

    Ses hope you are Ok and that things have improved for you, I think about you most days especially when my children play up.

    Di I hope you are feeling a little happier and are begining to recover.

    Richard hope you managed a day at work?

    Well after yet another trip to the docs yesterday, I decided to make an early morning dash to have a liver function blood test. Got to the clinic at 7am (it doesn't start till 7.30am) to find there were 14 people in front of me. At that unearthly hour in the morning. Well I arrived home just as the window cleaner was finishing so I emptied my purse and he had all my money, as we were away on holiday last time so i owed 2 cleans. So no chocolate tonight sad

    Take care all.

    Lizzy

  • Posted

    Hi Lizy & Everyone!

    Poor you with no chocolate Lizy thats what keeps us going! There were a lot of people out early this morning for the test lol. Hope all goes ok with your test. Ses and Lindy like lizy said hope you are both ok and I also think about you both. Linda hope you are taking some time out after your busy couple of weeks. Di I hope you are getting better each day and feeling a little brighter. Richard hope you had a decent day at work! What is your job? Also hope you hear from the rheum soon. Think it took me about three months before I was seen. Each area is different though. He was the one that definately said I had fibro. They look for pressure points around the body and if you have I think it is more than eleven and above they say it is fibro. I had just eleven so only just scraped through. When I saw him as well gave me an steriod injection to also find out if it was fibro. If injection had worked would have meant it wasn't fibro but luckily or unluckily for me it made everything a lot worse.

    Had to go for a second time and thats when told them the injection hadn't worked. Gave me some things to try and help like gentle exercise and going to bed at the same time and getting up at the same time even if I was tired. Not always able to follow that one with family life lol.

    Was my gp who suggested seeing a physio to get some exercises.

    Take care all!

    Tess

  • Posted

    hello richard and all those wonderful girls

    like the girls said richard come on and at least us on here can understand what family and friends seem not to see..

    well mornings is a no go with me.. i now have carers coming in in the mornging to help me wash and dress(not much longer though as we cant afford to keep paying them) they come at 11 till 12 and im glad its later as i find mornings so so hard.. im on higher dose of morphine on my patch now but im not sure it its working as today my hands and feet have been burning and so painful even when i dont move them.. like all of u.. when i was diagnosed in sept 08 i kept thinking this will go and i will be different from the other fibro people but now i know im not.. it just annoys me that i have lost friends as cause they cant see my pain they just think i dont want to go up town dancing with them... its not that... its i just CANT. i just want to be normal, was told by doc.. she could put my patch morphine up but.... the next dose would make me feel sleepy as im on a high dose as it is.. but im still in pain so i take it nothing will help this and that upsets me... i really hope ur all well and not in to much pain... and thanks again for listening....

  • Posted

    Hi Richard

    I,m male and also waiting to see a reumatologist for fibro, hopefully soon.I started off with co-codamols, now on co-codamols,60mg morphine a day,temazapam,dosulepin.

    I have acid reflux,IBS,chronic back pain going all the way up,shoulder pain,neck pain,restless legs,sciatica and aches and pains most days and sleeping problems due to pain.I wake up exhausted most mornings,stiff as a board and feel best around t-time until about 8pm. I dont like Christmas etc as i get stressed about not being able to buy presents,shopping etc which makes my problems worse when i realy dont need to feel bad at this time.

    People rarely see me outdoors when i am bad so only see me when ok then i feel as though i,m a scrounger putting it on.I take gingseng,ginko biloba,st johns wort,green tea, bee pollen, maca(the plant) echinacea,horny goat weed,multi vitamins,cod liver oil and still feel under the weather most days.

    I dont think the reumatologist will be able to do much for me as i am on lots of pain relief anyway, but just to put a name to my symptoms will make me feel better without being made to feel wussy or a hypocondriac.

    Good luck Richard with the specialist.

  • Posted

    Hi Brian

    Nice to see another man on the site.

    This illness is so hard to deal with, this is a great place to come to for support on good and bad days. Nobody ever judges yoU.

    I have to go now as I need to get bread for breakfast.

    Take care.

    Hope everyone has a good day.

    Lizzy

  • Posted

    Hi Brian

    Good to see another man on the site! We all need support male or female. We don't just talk about Fibro! Talk about other things that might be getting us down or things we are doing. I hope when you do get to see the Rheumatologist you will finally be diagnosed with Fibro.

    You at least then feel you are not being a fraud and all these things are happening because of a condition you have. Other people don't understand how bad it is as to them we look ok.

    By the way I am Tess 53 and married with five children, two granddaughters. I found out that I had fibro last June when I saw the Rheum and he did pressure point test. If you read my reply to Richard you will know what that is. I also have arthritis, ibs, acid relux and thyroid troubles. I am like you have trouble with sleeping with the pain in my legs, knees, back and ankles. Luckily top half not too bad. I get off the sleep ok but always have trouble with getting back off to sleep with the pain. I had all my aches and pains etc for about seven or eight years before I finally found out it was fibro. Went from one doctor to another until I found a lovely doctor who took the trouble to listen to be and do all the blood tests to rule out other conditions and then sent me to see the rheum. He also sent me to see physio who gave me some gentle exercises to help with pain. By doing them it has made me feel a lot better as the endorphines when you excercise is like a natural pain relief.

    Do come on and have a rant or chat anytime. The other girls are all lovely and will give you the support you need. Lizy has already been on, but there is Linda, Di, Lindy, Ses who I am sure will pop on and chat with you sometime.

    Hope you don't have to long to wait until you see the Rheum.

    Take care

    Tess

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.