New relationship freakout, caused relapse?

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Hey guys,

...it’s been a while. I’ve actually been trying not to post on here- as it’s like admitting that I’m struggling again! 

Actually feeling anxiety as I write this! 

I last wrote on here in April/May when I went through a stressful period and decided to increase my dose from 20 - 30 then to 40! (Big mistake!) lol eventually I went back to 20 and my body seemed to balance itself out... all was good- went on holiday, felt good... happy days!

Recently, I got into a new relationship- it’s been 2 and a half months. I really feel strongly about this person and I’ve started stressing, you know how it goes constant ‘what if’s’. It’s making me ill, can’t keep food down, constantly anxious, stressed, tight chest, headaches. 

Prior to this, I had felt fine and only been taking my tablet every other day, sometimes not taking it for days at a time. Felt absolutely fine. Then, at the beginning of the November I panicked and thought- what if I get ill while this relationship is new?! Ever since, it’s been a downward spiral... anxiety attacks, panic that I know is unwarranted... but it feels so real. 

So since then, I started taking 20mg every day again, have been taking it again for about 8/9 days now and still feeling absolutely crap... really worry how this will affect my partner as he is so lovely and I feel he doesn’t deserve this as he’s had enough to put up with! 

Do you think this could be related, to me not taking my tablets and then starting regularly again?

I honestly feel like switching medication... as this is the second quite bad blip I’ve had since being on it...

Or should I give myself a while to adjust to taking them regularly again? 

All advice welcomed and hugs to everyone!

Louise

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4 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi

    You say you were doing really well on 20mg , there’s your answer , stay on 20 , it’ll take a while to settle down but it will.

    Be honest with your fella , he won’t run off if he knows and can understand.

    Take care 

    Matt 

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    • Posted

      Thanks Matt,

      Just read your previous discussion- good to know you are feeling better. Really gotta be so careful with these meds- but just have the confidence that the brain will balance out once again... like it always does! *rolls eyes* lol

      Getting there gradually... smile

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  • Posted

    Hey you. Sounds perfectly normal in the sense that the side effects you are talking about go hand in hand with starting up the meds again.  You have been here before though, ride the wave which will get bumpy but know that in a few weeks you will be back to the good old you. I have been on and off it 7 times in 20 years and each time I get the same horrific side effects for the first few weeks.  But its worth it in the end.  Stick with it and Easy now . Mark
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    • Posted

      Hey standup- thanks for your comment! Thanks smile it’s easy to worry the meds’ are ‘pooping out’ lol

      Yes you’re right, always worth it! Will be taking them once a day from now on... especially through the winter! D:<

      Thanks again! 

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