Nightmares of the person who assaulted me keep reoccuring
Posted , 3 users are following.
Okay so please don't think I am crazy because I literally have no one to talk to because everyone thinks I'm crazy...
So occasionally I get nightmares of the days I was assaulted, and I feel like I am reliving them. I will often wake up screaming and not being able to breath and I feel like I am re living everything all over again. However, recently has been really bad. I've been having reoccurring nightmares of 2 different things.
First nightmare: I'm continuously walking down the same hallway and on both sides to me periodically he'll appear and say things to me or try to grab me and right before I wake up, there's an exit sign on top of a door and when I open it there's people laughing and calling me a liar and just all around really bad things.
Second nightmare: I'm reliving different scenarios that I was in with this person.
I've been having a hard time going threw my day to day activities without being overly paranoid of everything and everyone, and being lost in thought.
Could it be the high possibility of me being triggered to recent events in my life? Or is there just some underlying thing going on within the nightmares that I really can't put together.
Sorry for the long message...I'm just stuck..
0 likes, 13 replies
sam18386 shadow1616
Posted
Oh shadow i am so sorry. I know how you feel! You need to get help for this yea can't do this alone. See your doctor and ask to see your doctor about PTSD or cptsd, the difference is PTSD is what you've heard of, c PTSD is to do with childhood abuse. I wish you luck, PTSD is vile! Get as much support as you can possibly get. I wish you luck, keep me posted and i'll chat to you if you want!
shadow1616 sam18386
Posted
Hey, thanks for replying! And, I'm always up to meeting new people, so thank you 😃
And, I do see a therapist but she doesn't believe my PTSD gets as bad as it actually does. And my family doctor will only refer me if i posed a threat to myself or others. My family either chooses to ignore my PTSD, push it away, say it doesnt exist, say im lying, or all of them. I feel trapped and alone because everyone thinks im over exaggerating the extents of my PTSD and it really frikin sucks 😦
sam18386 shadow1616
Posted
Aw bless you, i have threatened to jump a few times through really ill health, my doctor is listening now!! You may need to see a younger doctor as they are so op to date about PTSD, the old fashioned ones aren't. Have you tried a company called rape crisis? They're brilliant and there should be ond in your area, either that or a PTSD counsellor. You need support and if you doctor won't do it, take someone with you to another doctor that will. I know exactly what you mean about family, mine swept it under the carpet when i was 19, just rowed with each other and then insisted i saw no-one about it. I was shattered. At 45 i still am (hence the counselling). Don't leave it get some help somehow! Good luck, it's a tough road but essential.
shadow1616 sam18386
Posted
I am looking and the closest crisis center is over an hour away 😕 Stupid district stuff!!!
sam18386 shadow1616
Posted
Ob dear where do you live then? Ask to speak to rape crisis. They're the best bet and good luck.
sam18386 shadow1616
Posted
Ob dear where do you live then? Ask to speak to rape crisis. They're the best bet and good luck.
shadow1616 sam18386
Posted
I live in Levittown, PA.
sam18386 shadow1616
Posted
Not being rude but just thick, where's that?
stephen92626 shadow1616
Posted
Hiya Shadow, I think I know what you talking about, I had a abused childhood, and I'm 49 now, and I still have nightmares of things that actually happened, and weird mixed up nightmares like you said, and people think I'm crazy too, I've tried All sorts of medication but nothing has ever stopped them,
shadow1616 stephen92626
Posted
I'm not really allowed to be on medication for my mental health issues (PTSD, depression, and anxiety.) I have to many health issues and allergies so my doctors just gave up. I've been actively looking for someone who will actually listen, but it's really hard and it sucks. I can't even talk about it with my family because all they do is shrug it off and tell me I'm over reacting and it's "not that bad". Then the guy I was with a few months ago (we were together for a year but then I broke up with him because he was abusive.), he told me I needed to learn how to get over myself and my issues. Like it's not that simple and I wish people realized that and actually cared to listen to other people. I joined this group because I knew that I could find really nice people like you and @sam18386, so thank you guys both for listening and caring it means the world 😃
sam18386 shadow1616
Posted
Hi shadow, i know what you mean and how you feel. See your doctor, not to get medication but see a PTSD counsellor. You need support and now. If you're desperately stuck don't forget about the Samaritans. X i'll pray for you.xx
stephen92626 shadow1616
Posted
I tried to xplain myself to different people and doctors year's ago, unless they've been through the s**t like we have, they just don't understand, I give up trying to explain 10-15 years ago, I am on medication, lots of it, or I really ouldw be crazy now,or in prison or dead.The people who we want help ffo have only read books about people in our situation, unless or until they personally feel what we feel, THEY NO IDEA,,I don't have words to describe how felt as a child upto 14-15 years old
Fear was a good day to me. Hope you get a good listener, I've just bought myself a blank book, and started writing my memories down,
stephen92626 shadow1616
Posted
What is the star 3 symbol beside my username please anybody??