No support from husband

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Well, all you who suggested we go to counselling, I tried and I was told he wanted a divorce, after 28 years, isn't it nice to know as soon as you're not good for anything anymore, you're just thrown out like a piece of garbage.

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8 Replies

  • Posted

    Oh that's terrible but it does show you're better off without him. Lots of love and good luck for the future x
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  • Posted

    so sorry Bunnyhugger. after 28 yrs investiments, one would hope for better.  in my experience in (running support groups for  people with ME/CFS) I observed, that generally speaking the men left when ME arrived but the women, generally speaking, stayed with their partners.  i'm afraid , i have to say that it'snot always the partners who dissappear but also those people whom you thought were your stedfast friends. 

    hope it gets easier for you.

    c

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  • Posted

    Oh no! How awful i darnt say what im thinking and feeling right now. Poor you. You must be feeling heart broken but honestly, you deserve better.

    Hugs for you 

    Sue x

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  • Posted

    Well what can I say.....

    I went through similar. My marriage of 24 years came to an end in Jan 2015.

    Tbh I feel it was nearing the end anyway. However over the 3 years prior to split have been the hardest 3 years as this is when I was diagnosed with cfs and fybromyalga after a long bought of glandular fever.

    Throughout that time I had no support from my husband either. He has actually since confessed that he thought I was making it all up. He just couldn't get it or understand why I had changed.

    I don't think partners can cope with the emotional and physical changes you as the patient go through. It's very sad and often it's hard enough to deal with yourself so its naturally going to be more difficult for a partner.

    I feel that I have been made to change my lifestyle by cfs and it controls me (which I hate) but it has changed my personality and created another person which I have had to try to except.

    All I can say is you have to do what's best for you and you only....

    Xx

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  • Posted

    Sorry to hear it, talk about shallow after 28trs,  dont know how much is selfish and how much cowardly, some people are like that. l hope you have support from others near, and you sound like youve a fighting spirit and in time can think stuff you l can make a decent life without you, Good luck for future. 
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  • Posted

    That's really awful. I'm so very sorry. I hope you can find support somewhere. Posting in this forum is a good step because we understand.
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  • Posted

    I think the worst part of this illness is that it has the effect of totally changing our lives and relationships. I know there's no-one in my family who understands my illness and I've had it for very many years and I'm now very much alone with it both in terms of close relationships and socially, as all my friends have disappeared too.

    Until the medical profession get to grips with this illness I think this situation will continue. People tend to relate to illnes the way the medical profession and society tell them and of course even the medical profession can't agree on what's wrong with us.

    It will eventually change but in the meantime I suppose we are on  our own, as a group and the more support we can give each other, the better.... It's just a shame that we can't be more militant and stand up for ourselves but of course with this illness, we just haven't got the energy... :-)

    .

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