Nostalgia/hyperawareness
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So lately I have been really emotional thinking about my past, like my childhood and every time i think about it I cry. It makes me so sad that I am getting older and so are my parents. I get this pressure in my chest every time I think about it. I think its because i miss being a child and living with my parents, & I want to relive those moments. I think about how when the time comes when they are no longer here that I wont be able to bear the pain. I have also been feeling way to aware of my existence that it makes me nervous. I'm so confused on why i am feeing this way because I have never felt like this before. Sometimes I think about how I'm just a soul in this body, like it doesn't feel real sometimes. i really don't know how to explain it but i get scared of being alive but i think about death a lot and it scares me. I get super emotional when I think about people in my life that one day are going to die and i just sit and cry and that's all i think about for the rest of the night. I used to be super social but i am home everyday and i am in my head 24/7 constantly thinking about my surroundings and life and it makes me cry. I don't know what is wrong with me or why I am feeling this way.
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