Not sure if I’m depressed again or if it’s a comedown?

Posted , 4 users are following.

I’ve been feeling really bad recently but I keep on trying to act like everything’s okay but it’s not, I do drugs pretty much everyday and i know itll make me feel worse at the end but its good whilst it lasts, I was diagnosed with pstd when i was 14, im now 18 turning 19 in a week, ive stopped taking my medication and going to my appointments in the last 6 months, im almost 19 shouldnt i be able to handle my own emotions by now? I recently moved out and have been living on my own for roughly 4 months, my friends came round the otherday and were very judgemental of me and how ive been living since i dont shower or do my laundry, i havent for months just given up with everything, im scared to tell people how i feel and I’m scared of spending my life alone. I don’t feel loved or cared about so sometimes I take extreme measures to make sure people do, or I just do things as a release it’s hard to explain I guess I just have all this stuff built up inside and I just get this feeling that I need to do something like overdose or maybe go on top of a car park roof and that’s the only way to get rid of it but I don’t want to die I just need clarification that people care I guess.

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5 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Beth, I'm really sorry that you're struggling with depression, when you say that you are taking drugs everyday can you be more specific, is this specific medication prescribed by your doctor or as in recreational drugs.

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    • Posted

      Hi Beth firstly realising that you have a problem is half the battle and their is only one way to feel better and that's to seek help to overcome it, lots of people will tell you that smoking pot is OK and that it's not addictive, tell that to the ones who cannot give it up and who sadly in many instances it can cause severe depression and in some psychosis which is life shattering.

      I would make an appointment with your doctor and tell them exactly how it is affecting you, I'm sure you would benefit from counseling and appropriate medication to help you recover.

      Do you have close family you can talk to

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  • Posted

    Let me make it clear , WE ALL SEEK VALIDATION , we do in different ways , as humans our good deeds and helping others is all we lived for , till the capitalism marketed everything , put a price on everything and de-valued good gestures that give us warmth for doing good deeds with no monetary value, eg if i offer to help change someones tyre my reward is seeing them drive after ive done so, if that person offered to pay me for the gesture , i would be offended and its gone, u feel alone because everybody is under the spell nobody has forgot who they are and y they exist, dont give up and let em win , enjoy your own company sometimes, there ain't much left in this f ed up world , as google reads my replies so i cant say much , stay strong

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  • Posted

    HI I totally understand why you take recreational drugs as many people need a crutch in their lives. It can be drugs, alcohol, smoking etc. These all make you feel good in the short term but in the longer term they just make your problems worse and can destroy lives.

    It's much better to try and sort your issues out even though it's painful having to deal with difficult emotions and feelings. My advice is to go back to your therapy and also on meds as this is a much healthier way to live. You have a long life in front of you yet and you want it to be as healthy as possible.

    As for other people I suspect you are a 'people pleaser'! Many folk are drawn to those who help them but funnily enough are nowhere to be found when you need them. Have a look at your circle of friends and discard any toxic people. You need to pay attention to your own needs, this will set boundaries and will draw in people who are willing to give as well as take. x

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