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Hi, my name is Olivia and I've been sick for 6 years. I'm now 19 years old. This is my first time on this sight. I'm hoping it will give me more hope and inspiration to keep pushing. I had a bad night tonight. I felt "good" when I woke up today. I felt happy. I usually attend Virginia Tech, but decided to stay home for a semester and go to community college so I could focus on my health. It all started when I was 13 and I got a cold. I've never been the same since...I don't remember what feels like to be healthy anymore. I got better over this past summer, getting up to about 70-75%. My first year of college ruined me and made me much much worse. I thought I was getting better, but I'm not. I feel trapped and like this will never end. I feel like I'm progressively just getting worse and worse with ups and downs. I have hope. I was supposed to go back to Virginia Tech next semester, but it seems like that won't be happening... I'm not sure what to do anymore. Do I get more tests done? Try a new specialist? Any ideas? Any hope? I'm lying in bed right, because my body is so exhausted. My heart is killing me, going in and out of episodes of something. I can't describe the pain or how I feel during my episode. It's hard to breathe. As if my sibconcious has forgotten to do it and it's literally difficult to breathe. I'm taking deep breaths, but each breath is exhausting. Does anyone else have this kind of pain/episodes?
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