Olanzapine/ zyprexa withdrawl , Please help....Anyone!!
Posted , 5 users are following.
i was diagnosed as " late developing bi polar" in 2008/9.
Twice I have tapered down to the bare minimum of this horror drug.
i must be honest here ; when I came off completely I was flying high, but in my mind at least this was because the drug held me down in severe depression. It was like letting the genie from the bottle....having had cut I was told to allocate time for my own enjoyment instead of being such a dreadful drudge.
So I smartened myself up, and got my interests ( cameras bikes and golf ) back on board.
Again I admit I was high. I could speak like a long time friend to a stranger on a train. I asked a 70 plus lady to dinner at my golf club.
i slept for 5 hours and fired off in all directions for the other 19!
So there is definitely a problem with me, but no!!! I am not bi polar.
A bit of head ball, perhaps. A schizo, perhaps. A mad man, no, I don't think so.
i had a breakdown in early 2008 due to an idiot who is employed as a line manager; this is where my troubles began.
There followed 6 months of anxiety and zero sleep. I mean ZERO.
Then I had 3 days in hospital when I was unconscious; not in control of my body in ANY way. A humbling experience.
The man from my local mental health centre said I had had a delirium.
i suffered extreme paranoia and hallucinations even after I managed to get discharged. I couldn't begin to describe the horror and torment, not just for me, but for my family too, of those two weeks.
That's enough background. 12 months ago I was prescribed 15 mg of Olanzapine and I have been left to sink. During that time I tried to make my exit from this mortal life with a 9 inch chef's knife and several plastic bags. The main reason for my cowardice with the point of that blade was this simple thought...if this fails I will just injure myself, put others to trouble but most importantly of all I would certainly be locked up in the mental hospital.
Freedom is something I treasure above all else.
In September 2017 I was given an ultimatum " take the drugs or be locked up"
My GP was on the panel with this decision.
So here I am stuck with it, whilst most correspondents are "coming off" the crap.
iI will finish by saying that I have never been a problem to anyone other than myself, except that I can be arrogant when high. However, I have always leaned that way. I have always had an excitable character combined with supreme optimism - even when things have been really tough. At my age, 69, you do live through some bad times.
I don't care who you are or what you do; please take 3 minutes to give me your thoughts.
As for everyone else looking through this topic; my advice is simple....
zyprexa/Olanzapine ....Ugh Urgghh.
1 like, 16 replies
apu91247 melvin11
Posted
Hey Melvin
I don't think you have any mental illness.Start tapering slowly from 15 m.g of olanzapine and settle at 2.5 m.g.
At lower doses you will feel much better and normal.
melvin11 apu91247
Posted
Hello apu91247
Thank you so much for taking the time to reply.
I dared not publish how low I have tapered down to already , in fear that the mental health authority find out and I end up behind a locked door (my greatest fear), as freedom is all I possess that's worth owning.
On New Year Day we shared a lunch that I found horrid ( I am pretty much a veggie but eat fish), after which I vowed to myself that I would never eat food like that again. Naturally I ate the meal out of politeness to my daughter who had prepared it but it was M&S steak pie. Later I confided to her that it was like a tin of dog food with a thin pastry topping.
From that day I have catered for myself. I read a book about nutrition and found ways that I could get my " 5 a day" with things like frozen or canned fruit and vegetables. Most importantly I stopped skipping lunches.
My diet vastly improved, I now sleep like a dead Angel for 5/6 hours and wake refreshed and ready to start the day. Also I don't drink beer EVERY night, though after toiling all day I do enjoy a beer or 3. I should also add that I made a change with my sleeping habits. I went back to sleeping au naturelle as I always used to and have an over blanket set on low for the night. Bedtime is delightful once again; although I am a single man and getting on in years, there's nothing quite like the feel of a fresh warm bed to stretch out in. When I think back I had many nights where I woke in the night with sweaty pyjamas, yuk.
On about the 12th of January I felt myself slipping back into depression. I was cold and lethargic and as the c/h boiler was on the blink I sat about till 11.30 am.
Feeling really down at the prospect of perhaps another 12 months of depression I suddenly got myself busy with simple tasks and lo and behold I felt the clouds lifting from my head - like magic.
Other than that morning I have honestly felt terrific. Happy, balance industrious and healthy. Life could not be better and I am grateful for it.
The authorities think that I take 15 mg and I hate living a lie , however I do take the Olanzapine every night before bed, just not in the quantity I am supposed to!
Feel free to write your thoughts and be assured that I am very grateful for them.
Regards, Mel
apu91247 melvin11
Posted
melvin11 apu91247
Posted
During that time my mind transported me back decades and I “saw” into the future. It was truly horrific. I saw myself causing catastrophic destruction; I believed that we were under nuclear attack. I could write a book about it.
When I regained consciousness I could not believe that we weren’t at war and that I hadn’t caused a radiation leak from the hospital.
On exiting the hospital I was put onto high strength anti biotics to fight a tummy bug and that is when I had the paranoia and was completely fixated by my own imminent demise.
One day I lay on the settee convinced that all my family were in the house having travelled up for my funeral.
At night I was sure that gas was being let into the house and I experienced what I can only describe as the smell of death.
Ever since I have been treated for bi polar.
I am not afraid to say to myself or anybody else that I am mentally ill because if people say your nuts, it sticks!
I have ALWAYS been high voltage; fun to be with. Cheerful in the driving rain - that’s me.
I have always left the misery for those that want it and all my life I was arrogant enough to state that there’s no such thing as depression.
Now I have had my share of it I have mellowed a little and perhaps changed my mind in that. However; I firmly believe that my depression is down to one thing ...Olanzapine.
Cheers; thanks for writing to a lonely old man x
apu91247 melvin11
Posted
melvin11 apu91247
Posted
It’s of some comfort to know that you are not alone in this world and I have read every word written on this site in the subject of coming off Zyprexa.
To me it is just a dumbing med.
I can imagine the shrinks saying “ just give him Olanzapine and that will keep him / her quiet”.
A chemical cosh and no less.
I believe that the human body can overcome anything; as long as it is nurtured, and nourished.
Right now I have a great sense of well being and I wish I could pass it on or share it with my nearest.
Have a great day; later I will look at your post/s closely and share my thoughts with you xx
sarah24378 apu91247
Posted
I do think we need to remember we are not doctors !!!
melvin11 sarah24378
Posted
Hi Sarah
i totally agree with that statement. The consensus of opinion on this site is almost unanimous that Zyprexa is an awful drug that is difficult to come off.
i am certainly of that view.
whenever I have contributed I have been at pains to point out that we are all different: what might work for one person could be catastrophic for another.
i can't deny that I was heartened by a stranger saying that I was not mentally ill. 3 doctors, including my own GP had a different view:- either take the prescribed medication or be hospitalised against your will.
That was pretty tough to take, even for a hard man like me.
So, no we are not doctors but we are all humans. When we give our time to help each other it somehow reflects the goodness back into our hearts and minds. Quite simply, that is why humanity and tenderness flow through the faces of the Dalai Llama, Mother Theresa and the Madonna... You must know people who have the same unselfish love.
Evil people in contrast often wear an evil countenance. It's as if the innocent look they were born with is destroyed by wrongdoings.
i can only aspire to be in the good group; surely nobody actually wants to be evil.
Thank you for writing and be assured that I accept my unwellness until the doctors give me the all clear.
My view is that I am a bit crackers and always have been. I do not believe I am bi polar, not for one minute.
Cheers, Mel
kate85501 melvin11
Posted
I too agree that olanzapine is a horrid horrid drug that I wish no one would take or get stuck on. I have been off zyprexa (10 mg) for 2 months and am feeling much much better. I feel like I have gotten hold of my personality again to about 80%, anxiety and panic attacks are being held at bay, and the last of the symptoms I am still struggling with is insomnia. My friendly suggestion if you ever get off the drug cold turkey like I did is this (I am not a doctor, but this is working for me currently), take it day by day, exercise! every day or as close to every day as possible (this is key), eats lots of food that will help detox your system and support recovery and healthy body (ie. acai, chlorella, lots of nuts like walnuts, pecans, cashews, almonds, vitamin c, magnesium, omega 3, yogurt, etc.), try to stay away from the doom and gloom posts that can heavily discourage anybody trying to get off of zyprexa.
I am getting more hopeful as each day passes off this drug and I feel like I'm getting closer to being 100% off psych meds completely. I am in the boat of people who believe all psych meds can be detrimental and almost feels like a trap in a way, but I also have heard people benefitting from certain psych meds so I will let you decide. As for me, I was diagnosed bi-polar to which I disagree with such little evidence and history or proper diagnosis. I had a nervous breakdown which led me to do a stupid out of character deed that ended me up in a mental hospital for a few days where I was force fed abilify and zyprexa. I am angry they gave me this against my will or knowledge, and the journey out of this hell hole has been one that has tested me mentally, physically, spiritually, and psychologically.
I hope and pray you will have success coming off this drug if that is ever an option for you. Hope and love.
melvin11 kate85501
Posted
Hello Kate
Am I being sexist if I say that it seems most contributors are females?
is it that real men don't talk about it? Well I am very much a bloke and certainly not ashamed of anything. My base line persona I am afraid is " a bit cocky, can be arrogant at times" Ah well, we are all different.
Your email to me reveals some common ground; I too have been forced to take the s h one t against my free will. Fortunately I never got locked away. We are both diagnosed as bi polar and Olanzapine is a "one fits all" drug.
It kills your personality.
It piles weight on your body
It takes away your joi de vivre
Eventually the downward spiral leads to reclusion
At the end of last year I had given up all hope. I went from being a multi talented multi tasking man to a helpless moron.
i skipped more meals that I ate.
i lost all my pride
After January 1 I pulled myself up from the brink. Helped by a book on nutrition I have since enjoyed my "5 a day" and take pleasure in preparing nice , nutritional meals.
My life feels well balanced with healthy pursuits of golf, cycling, and I am back muti tasking to keep my old house in shape.
Your words were a source of inspiration.
Many times I have felt alone with my problems.
Only people who have experienced mental illness can understand.
All the high brow doctors I have consulted have been sympathetic, but honestly, they don't get it! " Take these one a day" (and to hell with how you feel about it)
You and I do understand and one day we will look back on this chapter of our life as an insignificant blip.
Already the the sun lights our days and warms us. Together vincera!
keep happy, Mel
kate85501 melvin11
Posted
hi Melvin,
I can relate with you more than you think..
"It kills your personality.
It piles weight on your body
It takes away your joi de vivre
Eventually the downward spiral leads to reclusion
At the end of last year I had given up all hope. I went from being a multi talented multi tasking man to a helpless moron.
i skipped more meals that I ate.
i lost all my pride"
Yep, sounds like a little what I was like on this drug. It is a personality killer. There's a Bible verse that says, the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy. (John 10:10, the 2nd part of that verse gave me hope, but I had to keep repeating it over and over again...)
Sounds a lot like what Zyprexa did to us in a way I think.
Another verse I kept having to repeat over and over when I was in dark moments coming off zyprexa was this, "I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the Lord has done." Believe it or not, it helped me out of despair a few times.
Whatever your belief system or faith is, I hope you will be strong and full of hope and be encouraged that it can be done. I am a work in progress and I hope that at the end of this dark tunnel I will be able to report positively and help others by encouraging them with my story.
Hope, joy, and love.
melvin11 kate85501
Posted
You surely will be an inspiration to many.
if just one person can win, we can all win.
The only losers will be the pharmaceuticals who profit from our grief.
i don't have any particular faith but I do have faith in fellow men and women. The minority that perpetrate evil are self ordained losers. Only those of a good heart know the joy that it brings.
Sleep well, I am off for a beer, cheers 😇
kate85501 melvin11
Posted
Melvin, I have some optimistic hopeful good news. My supplements from neuro genetic solutions just arrived and it came with a book titled "How to get off psychoactive drugs successfully" which is full of valuable information backed by science and I for the first time in a long time feel very hopeful that I will successfully fully recover from zyprexa in a relatively short period. I do not plan to go back on zyprexa or any other psychiatric drug at this point, but the book and supplements are mainly targeted towards anyone who is trying to get off any psychoactive drug and is still taking any of them. There are good easy to follow taper plans included with the supplements and I'd suggest you give it a look.
I will keep you posted on the results as time goes on.
my continual best wishes and very best to you Melvin and anyone reading this.
with hope and love
apu91247 kate85501
Posted
melvin11 kate85501
Posted
My best wishes for continued success and I hope to follow in your footsteps.
Have a great day xx
Ally01381 kate85501
Posted
Great Positive update