Partner due for surgery...what should I expect?

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My partner is due to have his decompression op in a few weeks. We have no clue what expect with regards to how long he'll be in hospital, how likely is it to be successful, what he'll be able to do when he gets home & how much care is he going to need?? We have 2 young children & I don't know how I'm going to cope.

I have read lots of horror stories on here about the op not working & people ending up worse! I'm terrified of what the future holds sad((

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  • Posted

    Hi, No easy answer on what to expect, there are a lot of different out combes all I can tell you is about mine. I had my surgery 12 months ago. I was in hospital for 5 days and off work for 7 months. Yes it was tough and for the first few months I had very bad vision and was totaly fatigued sleeping 18 hrs a day. I am a lot better now work full time, drive and have very little pain compared to what I read about on some of the postings.

    I don't want to get your expectations artificially high but mine was a really good outcome and yours may be too. He is going to need a lot of love and support and for the next few months you will be the most important peron in the world to him. I am sendling you as much luck as I can and hoping it goes well for you too.

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    • Posted

      Thank you so much for sharing your experience. It's good to know that there are people out there who have a good outcome. Did you do anything in particular to help your recovery or just painkillers & good genes?? Fingers crossed he has a relatively 'quick' recovery. Thank you
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    • Posted

      I think the sleeping was my bodies way of dealing with what was happening. I got up and walking as soon as I felt up to it and managed a short walk every day even if only for a few minutes. I did not do much else  I could not read or watch televisnion, I spent a lot of time as a sofa bear. I had a few visitors but to be honest I could only cope with them for very short periods.

      I did very gentle streaches to keep my neck moving and stood up when I could. When I was beginning to feel better after 5/6 months I did try weeding in my garden and completely over did it which put me back a couple of months so watch out for wanting to do too much too soon it is not worth it.

       

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  • Posted

    Hi there

    My husband had surgery in oct and has been battling with duroplasty patch leaks since then. He has had to have two more surgeries (1 in feb and 1 in March). Fine my post from approx 1 month ago on here and it will explain everything. He doesn't regret having the surgery as the symptoms from chairi are gone we are just battling to get the leak fixed.

    From a caregiver point of view he was home within 48 hours but that was very early and normally it is 5 or so days. His headaches were extreme and we had to keep the house as quiet as possible as his hearing was very sensitive. We made a temporary bedroom in our dining room so he was ground floor as he wasn't allowed to climb stairs or drive for 1 month.

    Please feel free to add me on Facebook from one caregiver to another we could be support to each other smile my name on Facebook is Mandy Wickens

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    • Posted

      Thank you Mandy, it's good to speak to someone in the same kinda position. I will def add you on Facebook 👍🏽 Our house might be a bit of a prob as its small & the bathroom is downstairs with bedrooms upstairs.

      I hope your husbands doctors get to the bottom of the leaks soon & he is making a full recovery

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  • Posted

    Hello, as stated evert case is different. For some they return and resume normal activities in a relatively short time, others , perhaps the ones most commenting on here, have problems and take a long time to recover. Thats one of the reasons for this discussion site.Some recover and carry on as "normal" after a few weeks, some like me a few months. Unfortunatly the only advice that can realistically be given is take it as it comes. Love and care are the best help for people recovering from the op. Sorry I can't be more spacific and I hope he is one of the fast recoverers. We are all thinking about you and your partener, best of luck.
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  • Posted

    Hi, is there anyone can help with the children or your hubby, after my surgery I needed help washing and walking for at least 2wks after surgery. You have been given good advice in here, as said every case is different. It took me about 2 to 3 months before I felt anywhere near going out on own. The operation itself is awful, and I was as sick as a dog every morning and dizzy, I had slurred speach to, but that's ok now. He will probably sleep most of the days, they make sure you can walk up and down stairs before you leave hospital. I think you won't really know how he will actually be till few days after op. As you can see on here all different but the key is rest and more rest. You will get through this but it will take time hun, wishing your hubby all the best for his recovery x
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  • Posted

    I had young children when I had my op, one just a year old. I was also quite lucky in that two of my sisters are nurses and they did loads of 'in house' research for me about what to expect, they couldn't actually be with me though as we all live 100's of miles apart. I was told to pay special attention to my health before op so I concentrated on a really healthy diet and plenty of fresh air and exercise. I was in hospital for 5 days. They send you home on strong painkillers which do just make you want to sleep and you have a very sore, stiff neck. The actual decompression operation has a high rate of success and most people seem to greatly benefit but there are a few who don't. It's rare to hear the success stories though because those people are well now and don't need to visit these forums! I know that I've never regretted having it. I found that I couldn't tolerate the children for very long so packed them off to mum for 2 weeks as my husband couldn't take any time off work to look after me or them (he'd just started a new job). I could manage the stairs - no change there, was able to wash and dress myself and could watch tv etc. My appetite was poor and i did feel sick for a while but I think a lot of this was due to the painkillers. I think I may have been difficult to be around as I can't stand people fussing over me so if your husband is like like me, just give him space (he'll soon ask if he needs anything). As you can see by all the comments, everyone's recovery is different. I wish you both a speedy recovery and don't forget to let us know how it goes! xxx 
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  • Posted

    Hello. I had my surgery 3 months ago. My brain was 10-12 mm outside of my skull. I was in the hospital for 2 days and then sent home. For the first couple of months, I had to sleep setting up. It was painful and I lost 2 weeks of my memory after surgery. It was completely gone. It may have been the drugs or just the trauma to my head. That was a little scary. However, I started seeing little improvements by the 2nd month. The pressure in my head after post op was completely gone. I have other issues, but my surgery wasn't typical. My surgery was supposed to last 2 hours, but when they got inside my head, they found that my brain was bleeding, which is not normal and that my brain was so swollen that it pushed outside of my skull. The surgery ended up being 4 hours. After surgery, my husband helped me bathe for a couple of weeks and made my meals. He helped me get comfortable so I could sleep (lots of pillows). I'm in my 4th month and it's getting better. I still have issues that keep me at the house. I have balance issues, memory issues (not as bad), speech problems, etc., but again, I believe that was from the horrible pressure of my brain pushing against my skull. I think the most important thing to remember, is to stay positive, especially for your husband. I know it sounds scary for both of you, but you guys can beat this. Lots of patience and lots of love. Don't let the internet scare you either. I did the same thing, but in the end, my surgery saved my life and it wasn't as bad as I had came to believe. Hoping the best for you and your family.
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    • Posted

      Hi, I had surgery 18 months ago satjjordan and like you I had speech problem but after couple of wks it was fine, they told me it was probably due to the nerves they went through, I couldn't do anything for myself and it was slow recovery. I had awful dizziness and nausea , I still take medication for this but not everyday, some days are better than others, but I'm working part time and making the most of things, it is scary and everyone recovers different, most post on here to help others and show that there is light at the end of the tunnel.and I think those who recover with no problems don't think to go on sites like this.
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