Physical Intimacy lessen peri symptoms ?

Posted , 6 users are following.

Hi,

    I was just wondering about the difference going through perimenopause

with a spouse/partner compared to alone,if being sexually active actually 

lessons the symptoms to a degree.I've read that being intimate can be beneficial in helping to regulate periods so I'm thinking there must be many more benefits I'm not aware of.My spouse and I are apart for months at a time due to work  so I don't experience it myself ,there's a lot of switching on and off with the physical intimacy.I imagine if understanding and closeness continues the transistion would be easier than alone also.Just don't know.

I know I look and feel much younger and energetic and positive when together.

  Thanks in advance for any input smile

0 likes, 14 replies

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14 Replies

  • Posted

    Everyone's different. Some women lose libido for a long time while going through perimenopause/ menopause, while others don't lose much at all. It's good that you enjoy having the closeness with your husband. Also, if you still have periods your hormones are keeping things going, it really transitions when you're entering menopause. This when some women experience the need for less intimacy and low libido. An organic proper diet seems to help reduce those effects. But so does cutting out sugar and caffeine.

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  • Posted

    Morning fairywren, I have to say that I am very lucky that my partner is amazing, we are still intimate and I definitely think it helps, maybe it's all in my head, but I couldn't imagine not having that and going through this as a singleton.great to here that when you do see your partner you feel younger, energetic and positive, have a great day, x,

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  • Posted

    Being apart like this with my husband has ruined me and caused an increase in depression and anxiety. I almost stopped controlling myself. Unfortunatelydue to stress and obesity my husband lost his libido and I suffer greatly because of it. I am even considering cheating on him. I cannot live without sex, right now with all the symptoms of peri it seems it is the only positive and enjoyable thing that there is for me.
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    • Posted

      Life and happiness shouldn't be about sex.  It should be about love, devotion and loyalty.  My husband also is not interested in sex due to obesity.  With my perimenopausal symptoms I don't want sex anyway.  I have had 2 and three month long periods.  I am a christian and think a lot about heaven and how one day I'll go there and all the problems of this world won't mean anything and how they shouldn't while I'm here either because this is just a short time in my life's journey. 

      ?Life's short, stay true. 

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    • Posted

      I think sex is an important outlet if our libido is still intact. It releases a lot of 'feel good' chemicals in the brain and I've talked to women who say they got thro menopause with a glass of wine and sex! Many others don't want sex at all of course. Neither is right or wrong. I do think tho, having an affair will only add to your stress, you may even lose your husband if found out. Can you talk to him about 'helping' you have an orgasm even if he doesn't want one?? Or can you cuddle him for physical contact then fix yourself up?? Not ideal, but maybe an alternative??

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  • Posted

    Thanks all for your replies,I'm Christian too and recently married after 11 years of not being sexually active so the gift of showing love physically is important at present.It is bonding and healthy when it's possible.

     Dear anetta it would be worth it to go to a councillor on your own even ,you do already have something very precious even though it mightn't feel like it.I know what it's like to a degree,but my man's words in type even mean way more than sex and I keep myself for him .It's a big sacrifice .Romance is important , in the old sense of the word .Maybe getting to know your man all over again through messaging and letters,at 48 it's a good time to kind of go over our lives so far.Send each other music links you like,remember stuff from when you were young.Love letters to help you reconnect.

      I know my libido is greatly affected by my spouses interest in me as a person,praying has helped me be keep positive and keeps imagination at bay when we are apart for months at a time- he prays me too.Eating healthily is amazing!Getting out and exercising when s******y frustrated is wonderful.

       I'll see if I can google anything about the topic ,there's probably not much smile

       

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    • Posted

      There stuff out there that helped me a great deal. It basically showed how to stimulate your hormones by simply placing your hand over it, like your ovaries and your pubic area, no fondling just sending love energy to activate your hormones and keep your intimate life active. I found it really works. You can find them on yt, there are even some funny ones.
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  • Posted

    I am a Christian myself. After years of being an unselfish person and giving everything, literally everything to my husband and child and my mother I realized that I was affected by the stress of living apart the most. In fact I show MS symptoms,and have a problem surviving. Sex is the medicine. I know because I have read extensivelly about it. I started failing right after my husband started abstaining from sex. Now my menopause symptoms are so huge I no longer understand whether it is MS or menopause or severe depression. My husband used to get sex whenever he felt like it in the past, ads a loving and obedient wife I was complying always. Now that I need it he believes it as an excess!! he is just selfish, overeats as a result of life stresses and because he likes to eat and probably also lost interest in me. This does not ean that in a year or two his hormones will not kick back in and he will find another woman, it is actually very possible. I do not consider going out and lookiung for somebody to have sex with as cheating, I believe I owe it to myself to keep my sanity and life. My depression is  of suicidal type, unfortunatelly. I dont think my husband really feels for me because if he did at least he would try.
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    • Posted

      I think, dear Anetta, that it sounds that there's a lot more going on in your marriage than just the lack of sex.... Lots of anger ( can drive depression), lots of frustration. Let me ask you, do you love him? Do you want to stay with him? If you do, having an outsider (a counsellor) can give you both a new perspective and strategies to heal your marriage. If you do not love him and he is treating you badly,....well, life is too short...do you need to start anew with a new partner? I know a couple of you girls are Christian and that may not sit well with you, but if your health is suffering that much I think the worst thing to do is stay the same...it's obviously not healthy.

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    • Posted

      I agree with Lisk. Also, why would your husband lose interest in sex? Is he a diabetic? Does he have any health issues? Medical conditions can also lower your testosterone. Why have you not discussed this. Also, how much older is your husband?
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  • Posted

    All I can say Fairywren is that I lost my libido years ago and then last year, it came back and my desire for sex was amazing. My husband got ill in 2011 and up until 2016 we didn't have sex because it affected his ability. Thankfully, after talking to him, he said he'd felt similar about things but hadn't said anything as he didn't want to upset me. He's a very thoughtful guy, bless him. I'm happy to say that our sex life is doing well, with a few hiccups given my husband's disabiity and my hormones but I feel a lot happier. 

    I feel younger and lucky to feel this way. We're all different though and what suits one person, won't suit another so we have to go with how we feel and try what is right for us as individuals.

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