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This is urgent! Okay so a brief history.... so I've suffered with depressed for as long as I can remember and last summer I was diagnosed with it officially and I've been on 20mg Prozac ever since. I've been getting better, I am better than I've ever been but the same cannot be said for my boyfriend.

My boyfriend has BDD and depression and last night he attempted suicide. As I am writing this he is in hospital. Doctors say he will be okay but no one is going to help him. He has an appointment with some people from CAMHS tomorrow who are visiting him in hospital. But I know he won't take any medication they offer him and he believes he is hopeless. Nothing I say or do ever helps. I am a wreck, I know that if I get as bad as I was before the prozac kicked in I will kill myself in a heartbeat, and I love my boyfriend. I know I won't survive if he dies. I need some advice, what do I do? I'm tearing myself apart :'(

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  • Posted

    I'm so sad that you are going through this.

    Its good that you know what's going on and you are getting professional help.

    Talk to your medical professionals and hope they will navigate you to the right course.

    Don't give up!

    Keep us posted.

    Good luck!

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  • Posted

    Really sorry to hear about your boyfriend. I'm in a different situation my husband has left needs help but won't get help, the worst thing is he works in Mental Health, his boss told me she can do nothing as he's an adult with capacity. Can you sit in on the appointment, is there anyone you could talk to so you could tell them he won't take any medication? Why is no one going to help him? Not admitting they need help and refusing meds is a man thing. I know exactly where you are coming from, everything I have tried does not and hasn't helped. You have acknowledged you have depression and taken steps to get medication and help he has to do the same. I have a long history of mental health issues, having had anxiety attacks and agoraphobia, I took Seroxate for over 24 years, I got off the meds eventually. My husband has signs of clinical/major depression with mixed anxiety and I feel helpless, at this moment in time believe it or not you are much stronger than he is, you can only help him if you stay strong. I'm proof you can do it. My friends are asking how I'm still standing, you are stronger than you think and having experienced depression as I have done for yourself makes you a stronger person. I know you love your boyfriend very much, I'm here for you if you need someone to talk to.
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  • Posted

    Thank you so much Jackie you hit the nail on the head. Why is it that men don't feel as comfortable talking about their feelings and getting help as much as we do? He thinks that if he asks for help he isn't as strong anymore, but I believe the opposite. It takes real strength to admit that you need some help and to stand up and ask for it takes balls. His excuses for not taking the meds are the side effects but the really nasty ones are so rare! He just won't listen.

    I'm very sorry about what you're going through with your husband though, it makes me so sad to hear of others misfortunes as well. But it's nice to know that I'm not alone, so thank you smile

    And Hotovaga thank you for being so kind, I will try to keep you posted. He has said that he would like to make a pact with me, that if he doesn't kill himself I have to promise that I won't do anything stupid either. I made that promise and I would make it a thousand times over if I had to! I just hope that it's enough.

    Thanks guys xx

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  • Posted

    I really hope your bf lets you sit in his appointment with him.Maybe you could look for couples counseling too?Im in my 6th week of extra help counselling & I have felt that dark feeling of despair & utter frustration.Yes ive had that sit on a bridge & a stranger just sat & talked to me-I realised I eeded help.Always people on here will help.
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    • Posted

      Thanks, basically he made me a promise that he wouldn't kill himself as long as I didn't, and I promised him that i wouldn't. And the next day I went to the hospital to pick him up and he stayed with me for the week before going back to his house. I really didn't want to leave him though because I'm so worried that on his own he might be more likely to do it again. He says that it's just getting worse and worse and that the doctors can't help him. He has given up before he's even tried and I don't know what to do 
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