Please help me DIE Peacefully.....

Posted , 12 users are following.

It has been more than 3.5 yrs since she left me, but I can't stop missing her every moment and thinking about her. She got married to someone else around 1.5 yrs back and I know there is not even a 0.0001% that she will be mine once again. I cannot live without her and I keep thinking about her ever moment. I just want to DIE at any cost, I don't want to live anymore. I have turned out to be a heavy drinker in the last couple of years and have undergone a number of CBT sessions but it didn't help. It has been more than 3.5 yrs since I last saw her/spoke to her......Please let me help DIE so that I am free from the PAIN forever.

1 like, 15 replies

Report / Delete

15 Replies

  • Posted

    Well, logically, no one on here is going to help you die. This isn't a suicide site. Not openly, anyway, though people are free to send private messages.

    I suspect the reason you're posting is that you don't really want to die at all. And that's a normal way to feel. What you really want is to find a way of recovering from your pain. You say you haven't been helped by "a number of CBT sessions". I'm wondering how many, as CBT is quite a long process. It's also possible that you didn't see the right therapist for you. And have you been on medication? I'm not normally one to suggest this, but I'm wondering whether you've been prescribed anti-depressants. They can be very effective, though it often takes several attempts before you and your doctor find the right one for you.

    By the time we get to middle age - and sometimes much earlier - almost all of us will have suffered some kind of devastating loss, so I'm sure everyone reading your post will sympathise with your pain. The difference is that you've somehow managed to get stuck in your grieving. I'm guessing this might be due to some underlying mental health problem which needs to be addressed if you're going to recover.

    I'm also wondering how old you are, and how long you were with your partner before the break-up. Sometimes when we're very young, it can be harder to get over the loss of a first love.

    Please consider going back to your doctor and discussing this again. And please be careful about ill-considered suicide attempts. The human body has an extraordinary in-built urge to survive. I'm speaking from experience, as a former nurse who's seen people inflict unbelievable damage on their bodies (including several who even shot themselves through the head) only to survive, but in a pitiful state.

    You do have the ability to recover from your loss somewhere inside you, but it's going to take some hard work on your part to activate this ability. I wish you well on your long road back to health.

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    I am SO sorry you feel this way!! It sounds like you have unresolved grief/pain and you really need to see a therapist ...You need to let her go so that you can go forward in your life. Perhaps you will meet someone new! who will make you happy but true happiness comes from within and you really need to focus on your future and forget about the past or it will weight you down. If you feel suicidal please call the psych hospital. They will help stablize you 
    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    You have to keep busy even though it is hard. It is still early stages yet.

    You will keep thinking about her but if you mix and socialize you will meet some nice people and who knows how many ladies you can be friends with. that will stop you dwelling on your ex.

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    You can live without her but you don't want to...right? I know exactly how you feel! I thought I would die when he stopped talking to me. I went into shock and just wanted to die. I thought I'd never survive it. It's been three years since we stopped seeing each other and I'm finally beginning to get rid of the things he gave me because it hurts too much to look at them. I never thought I could ever give those things away. I understood that doing so will allow me to let go. It has been one of the hardest things to overcome. I don't think I will ever completely get over it but I can live my life and know I told him exactly how I felt. He choose to walk away and I finally had to accept that. I still hurt but I no longer want to die. I allowed myself to go through the pain. I finally accepted it. I learned that not truly accepting was holding me back from healing. I'm not healed but I am finally at the stage where I want to live. Don't give up on yourself! I want to at times but I fight it and remind myself that other people love me.

    I became very depressed and anxious when he left. I then got on meds that had bad side effects for me and became extremely depressed and anxious and during this time agreed to go back to my ex... a man I do not love but the father of my son's. I am beside myself and now feel like I am stuck with no way out. However, i am still fighting and I am trying to find a solution to the predicament I put myself into. This partly happened because I didn't want to live without the man I fell in love with. My point, we make mistakes we later regret because at the moment, we didn't want to live. Don't do something you may later regret or take your life for someone who does not love you. You deserve better than that. I hope anything I've said helps and that you see what a precious person you are and that you'll find love again. I'm holding on to that and take it just one day at a time. You matter and I know your family and friends would be devastated if you ended your life. XX

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      By the way, i started on meds that now I am feeling numb with no emotion. Know that with medications, it's trial and error but eventually you find the ones that work for you. Just keep fighting to get better. Even with no emotion, I know I have to. Let us know how you get on...
      Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    I don't know how to help you die, but I know how u feel. The first time I saw sue, not her real name, it was as if Chinese gongs went off in my head. I know this was the woman for me. After dating awhile she began to agree. She was everything a friend and lover could be. But we got separated for a while pursuing higher degrees. She met someone else. For a while I stayed in the picture but sue ended up marrying him anyways. That was 35 years ago and my heart has always keep her close to this day. I have moved on and started my life with " heather". We have two adult children. but if sue ever contacted me I don't know what I'd do. What I cling to is her happiness. I truely love her and want her to be happy. I know she has lead a good life with her husband and they have two kidd. After this many years married she must be happy and for that I am glad. One thing, even if you try to innocently contact her to say hi is that she will probably figure your stalking her. I chased sue down several years ago and sent her a letter. She never responded. If she is happy why would she risk contacting a old flame. All it would do is split up marriage,

    In short I have felt your pain for many years. Wish her the happiness you wanted to show her and take solace in knowing she is happy. You will be able to move on with your life if you do. U will always have your love for her but it is time to let hat go

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    See death....it's not running away from life...it's not people who are scared wants to die...I seriously feel..one who seeks for death is the one..who have been strong for a very long time...and now it has reached the peak

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    I feel like you too but no one will help. But not for a person you can find another women. I know you must love her and it hurts like h*ll. But you can get better give it time. This is a old post I hope you're still alive and with a new girl.wink 

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    I'm sorry your so sad and can see how devastating it is to you, you can pm me if you want

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    My son suicided five years ago. I live alone and have become an alcoholic. I have ptsd which most people don't recognise. I live in horror, dream horrific dreams, and wake up in horror. No one and nothing can take it away. My family are p****d off with it. They have segregated themselves from me. I have no place in this world anymore. Pain is my life from morning to night. I blame myself. I have no place in this world anymore. I have tried to end it but have botched it up. I know I no longer fit in. I drift from day to day in excruciating pain. Please I need help to end it. 

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi deborah 26924

      We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologies for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.

      If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.

      Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.

      If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.

      Kindest regards

      Patient

      Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    I lost my son to suicide. I live alone. I cry myself to sleep, have horrible nightmares, and wake up in despair. No one can help. I think assisted suicide would be a nice way to get the peace I need. I have been drifting around in pain for years. If they do it for a sick body, then why not a sick mind. 

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      deborah 26924, they don't understand. I know exactly how you feel but the truth is, people who haven't been through anything similar will never understand- no matter how much they try to give advice. Almost all these advice-givers will- if they ever go through anything similar- realise all their advice was meaningless & are among the weakest of us all.

      In the meantime, they live their happy lives dealing with relatively small problems by comparison, not able to relate to those in constant pain. It's a fact of human nature unfortunately.

      Report / Delete Reply

Join this discussion or start a new one?

New discussion Reply

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the forums to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the forums are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the forums is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.

newnav-down newnav-up