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Post Hysterectomy 2 years on still depressed I can’t have more kids

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ashleigh70271
ashleigh70271

Basically this is my story and advice I’m seeking. I have one child to a previous relationship that was toxic. Met my husband to be when my daughter was 9yrs old. I am now 35. I then started with really bad health issues caused by huge fibroids covering my entire womb which resulted in a partial hysterectomy at the age of 32. I still have my ovaries but no cervix or womb. At the time I was advised there was no other option after trying every option out there. I was told if there was 1% chance I could fall pregnant I would Miscarry so basically that was my advice to have surgery. I went through with it being told it was a simple easy op that wouldn’t take long to recover and would get rid of all my health problems. So wrong I had a traumatic op my womb was wedged in my pelvic bones which explains the excruciating pain and op that took 4.5hours leaving me in so much pain. Because of my age the nursing staff treated me awful giving me very little pain relief to the point I nearly fainted 3 times from the pain. I took over 6months to recover to the point I could actually walk then it took another 12 months to regain my strength. I have since 3 years on still feel so depressed and suffer with really bad anxiety. I have had so much regret and feel so empty and lost that I can’t have any more children. It breaks my heart so much to see others around me be able to have several kids and I can’t. This has caused problems in my current relationship. I love my daughter who is now 15 more than life itself and she would love nothing more than a sister or brother. I have recently found out through research there is a possibility because I still have my ovaries I can still have a child through surrogacy. After research I see this option is some what impossible in my situation we are not minted and money isn’t readily available. I am falling to pieces as I so much want to be a mum again and want a big happy family the family I never had. Can anyone relate or give some advice on how to move forward with this pleases. 

1 like, 3 replies

3 Replies

  • liz18527
    liz18527 ashleigh70271

    Posted

    That’s a tough one, I’m thinking after 30 is risky, but in your case it seems as though, you would be fine having past 30. But you have ovaries but not a womb nor cervix, I think that wouldn’t conceive. Look to adopt or foster, many children need good parents and stable home. Stay strong but keep researching.
  • lynda20916
    lynda20916 ashleigh70271

    Posted

    I'm so sorry that you're going through this.  Your illness, surgery and recovery were truly traumatic.

      

    You have a family, people that love you, your current relationship and a daughter, but you're choosing to focus instead on what you decided long ago would make you happy.  Your fantasy of what life should be. And it appears to me that you are putting your energy into depression and regret. Is that how you want to spend the rest of your life?  

    Only you can answer that question.  

    We are all born into the facts and circumstances of our lives.  We have experiences that test us, sometimes beyond endurance.  The evidence of which is found on this site.  It is up to us to decide whether to accept our lives and the moments of happiness and grace that we are given.  xx

     

     

    • ashleigh70271
      ashleigh70271 lynda20916

      Posted

      Not sure if you got my last reply as my internet played up then. This is the first time in my life I have done this on a chat site it’s so nice to talk to people in the same boat who don’t know you. It helps thank you xx
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