PRegnant Alcoholic

Posted , 9 users are following.

hi

my partner is pregnant and an alcoholic. She also suffers anxiety and depression. she is getting herself drunk nearly every day and i dont mean tipsy, shes totally legless. when i confront her about it she gives me a whole sob story and im fed up with it. if i have a rant at her she sometimes self harms. she current getting mental help through the nhs with DBT and trauma therepy but those appointments are months apart.

im petrified for our unborn child and our 14 month old that is left in her care while i am at work. im soo close to calling it a day and telling her to go but i want to help her so we can remain a family for our child and future child. im scared whats happenin to the unborn child. and scared of how i will cope as a single father if i do decide to tell her to walk.

Any advice or info would be brilliant?

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8 Replies

  • Posted

    very difficult this one far is she in pregnancy, second it seems she has no control because of her illness, my advice is never confront full face (i have severe mental health problems) cook her, a meal and just talk to her, i am not saying don't ask her but even mentally she thinks differently like me to how questions are put to her, show support to her rather than judge her so be calm and make her feel special, but before she got pregnant was she drinking, no matter what she needs you to understand and with the appropriate help all will be fine ok.

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  • Posted

    Hello,Both my late parents were Alcoholic s.I suffered as a small child & has severe Anxiety.My Mother died when I was just 18 .So very awkward.Make her a nice meal,& sit down & talk to her.You don't want your baby to have severe health problems,neither does she.So she needs to stop.She needs help & support from you,& all those that care for her.Explain to her that each drink she has is going to injure your baby.Please get help before she really hurts you or your baby.Regards Amanda h

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  • Posted

    Hello,

    This seems like a very difficult situation and I can moreless relate what is happening to you as my father went through the same thing with me. My mother drank the whole time she was pregnant with me (beer not hard liquor) but she had already been an alcoholic for about 20 years. She passed on her alcoholic gene to me, and unfortunately I think this is something your child will have in the future. Is there some way your wife’s family can take care of her while you are at work? I know this sounds restrictive but not giving her any money at all to buy alcohol or anything would be a way of controlling she doesn’t drink while you are not there. I think therapy and an intervention at this point is the only thing that can stop her from drinking the rest of her pregnancy. Extreme situations call for extreme measures. She isn’t just putting herself at risk but also your baby. My father divorced my mom 3 years after I was born because she was putting my life in danger while she was drinking. My father was 58 years old when I was born and he raised me alone his whole life, and I was so blessed to have the best father I could ask for. No one taught him how to raise a little girl alone, my mother raised my older brother and sister but they also went to boarding school due to my fathers work. I was the first child he raised alone until I went off to university at 18 years old. I know it won’t be easy but if you have to take charge and raise your kids without their mother, you will be saving their lives too and giving them a bright future. In the mean time please seek professional help with the help of her family and yours. If rehab is not an option because it’s expensive then please restrict her financial freedom and have her monitored when you are not there, so she cannot buy any alcohol. I’m really sorry you have to go through this, but remember your children go first, and if she cannot be a good mother it will be her loss. Don’t make it your kids nightmare. Xx

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  • Posted

    Hello I can relate alcoholism has been in our family for as long as I can remember. My dad was a mean alcoholic who always took it out one everyone especially my mom. She finally left which I don't blame her one bit! My brothers and sisters grew up being alcoholics also I lost 2 brothers and 1 sister to alcohol! Now I have 4 grown children 2 of which are alcoholics. One of them the youngest who is 31 yrs old still lives with me continues to drink on his 2 days off. I'am feed up and I'am no longer tolerating his drinking. I finally told him he drinks I'am packing his stuff and kicking him out! So far it's working he's going on 2 weeks sober! S o shaking things up helps making hard for them if the drinking continues is the best thing u can do. I know it's hard to throw them out but the bad behavior has to stop! My son has never gone one weekend without drinking ever..but I truly feel in my heart that tough love works! You we don't deserve it..well take care and hope to hear a reply....................gina

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    • Posted

      Dear Gina, I found you via the reply to the 13 year old you just replied to and you certainly gave good advice. I have read and replied to 1000s of people the last 5 years here and never heard of someone with so deeply embedded problems and death related to alchohol. You could and would make an amazing guest speaker! You are still alive and now struggling with you son althougk he is sober for some time. 6 weeks ago he had been sober for 2 weeks and i am really curious to know if he is still sober. Best of luck to you. You are an angel😃 Robin

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  • Posted

    You have to be strong and supportive. Sometimes the side effects and withdrawal symptoms are so strong and potent that the baby needs to be hospitalized at least for the first few weeks after birth. This condition can be life threatening. If possible, go for a treatment and it is advised to continue the treatment as sudden stop can cause life threatening withdrawal symptoms are dangerous for both the mother and the fetus.

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    • Posted

      Pamela, just wondered why, after only recently joined the forum, you are resurecting old discussions by random replys.

      It would be good to hear how alcohol affected you, and how you recognised your problem. What sort of treatment did you have.

      I think your input would be far more beneficial, than baffling people with medical terminology. I must admit i had to google desmethydiazapam lol!

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