Raging Hormones

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I had a full hysterectomy 6 weeks ago and have found that over the last few weeks i have had some terrible mood swings, One minute I am fine, the next i am crying uncontrollably and the next I want to hurt someone ( both physically and verbally). I have also found that the person I want to hurt most is my partner as I feel he has been very unsupportive. When I start saying unkind things I can hear myself saying them but it's like I cannot stop myself from saying them. As yet I have not discussed or been offered any HRT and initially wanted to see if I could find an alternative medicine for it. At the minute I feel so depressed that am I at the end of my tether and really dont know what to do. It seems that everyone I talk to just doesnt understand how I feel (and whilst I appreciate until they have walked in my shoes they dont know how i feel) and they keep telling me to snap out of it or sort myself out, as if I can help how I feel. I have an appointment next week with both the consultant and doctor but just want to know im not alone and if anyone who has experienced these feels can offer me any advice. 

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  • Posted

    Argh, Amanda, I remember that phase well. Hit me within weeks of op and got progressively worse over the next 3-4 months. Then it lifted. No HRT. However, I wasn't able to save the relationship. Bf was reasonably supportive, but I did a runner and moved out. We never recovered from that. So my advice would be to accept that you're going to feel like this for another 3 months and work out how you are both going to survive it. It's really just another part of the procedure: you've had the physical pieces removed but now you have to cope with the emotional "removal." If I had my time again, I would have written a letter to my bf that set out my emotional state and that asked him to give me six months grace as I recovered from the emotional side of the operation. I would also ask the same of myself! No big decisions, no beating myself up. Just a lot of "one day at a time" type  of approach. 
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    • Posted

      I actually wrote him a letter telling him how was feeling which he read, whether he digested it is another matter. What I really want is him to hold me and tell me I'm doing great and that we'll go through this together. However, instead he's throwing himself into work and working away a lot. I really wish they could live a day on my life to see how it feels. I'm not looking for sympathy i just want support, love and encouragement. 
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    • Posted

      Ah, the difference between what we want and what we get! So it seems to me that you need a plan B to go with the Plan A (which is that he changes into a Hugh Grant/Prince Charming hybrid and holds you tight biggrin Take some time to consider what you need to do to get you through the next six months. Where can you legitimately and safely get that support, love and encouragement until your partner manages to handle his fear (it's fear) and step up?
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  • Posted

    oh, and Amanda, society seems to think that we shouldn't be p*ssed off about anything in life, let alone having most of our insides carved out. We DO have a right to have bad days, to voice our dismay, to throw the odd remote control. You're not going mad, you're just reacting to your situation. Cut yourself some slack and stay away from the "pull yourself together" brigade. 
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