Reassurance!
Posted , 4 users are following.
Hi, so, I dont know if I am over reacting but maybe some resassurence would be good too.
Im 17 years old and Im short, just over 5ft, and I weight 42kg. I have this desire to be skinny and be the smallest out of the people I know or see because I feel this is right due to my height.
I track my calories and make sure i dont eat over 1200 a day. Whenever I do eat something I dont think I should I feel guity and regret eating it. I weight myself all the time and feel annoyed at myself when I have 'gained' weight.
I guess it got a bit more serious because I have havent had my period and I found myself to be very constipated last weekend, which is when my period was due. I still havent started my period either, could this be down to my eating?
I am also going away in the next week or so and I know there will be lots of nice restaurants, one of which is an American one, which i know has a lot of calories, and im already planning to eat the healthiest thing on there and then that can be it for the day. I want to eat what I want and not put on weight but I just dont know how to do it.
I akso believe my mind is very weak, I cannot handle my stress and i am increading nervous all the time, to the point I would have a panic attack. I have been to the doctors about this sort of thing but nothing seems to be happening, it has been getting better but as one gets better another gets worse.
Any advice would be lovely, thank you!
1 like, 3 replies
Inmate88 katy48083
Posted
Hi katy48083. I have a complex eating disorder. I have anorexia nervosa but it also links in with my OCD, depression and paranoid schizophrenia.. so its very complicated! I am just over 2 years without a period. For me I actually see it as an advantage to not have the hassle and discomfort.. plus I never want kids.
Anyway. When we get to/below a certain weight we stop ovulating. Along with other reasons, it's also our bodies way of telling us that we arent healthy enough to carry a child, so it stops pregnancy from becoming a possibility. Hence no period. This isn't health of course, but it is normal so it's not 'just you' and yes its becuase of your eating. I'm not medical, but this is what I've been told by my entire psychiatric team.
I know you'll realize this already, and I know it doesnt bring any comfort - at least it doesn't to me.. but I'll say it anyway. One actual meal wont cause you to gain fat, so try and enjoy your american meal!
You would notice a difference in the scale of course because the food is physically in your body. Just like you'd notice a difference if you stepped on the scale having not eaten the meal, but instead you're holding the meal still on the plate. The scale will still go up becuase your body has the physical weight of the food upon it. I hope that makes sense to read!
I constantly remind myself of this when I eat, in the hope that one day it will sink in and comfot me. No joy as yet! I only eat three food items and they are very healthy, but still my mind destroys it's self worrying about it.
katy48083 Inmate88
Posted
Hi!
Thank you so much, I definitely like your presepective over the scales and the food, i'm certainally going to try and use that one!
And youre right about the one meal stuff, its so difficult to get your head around once your mindsets changed...but hopefully we can all achieve whatever it is we want to achieve together one day!
I wish I could offer some help back but I'm just so clueless about all this stuff! Maybe sometimes its just nice saying these things out loud to others so you feel like youre not alone!
I wish you all the best for the future and if you ever felt you needed just to tell somebody something, Im all ears!
Again, thank you so much!
katlouise1989 katy48083
Posted
The above post is spot on particularly about scales.
Katy - i've sent you a private message.