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Relationship anxiety

Posted , 3 users are following.

nicole12090
nicole12090

I've been with my boyfriend for 1.5 years. We lived together for 11 months before I went to college, so last september and then moved out this September 4 hours away from him. While I lived with him, I would get severe anxiety. He would go to work in the evening, and sometimes wouldnt come back till 2am. Usually hanging out with his brother in laws. I would start panicking and crying. When he would get home, I would be completely terrified and sobbing. He would do his best to help and calm me down. It got so severe that I would break down before he even left for work. That was probably the hardest thing in our relationship. We almost broke up over it. However, I got over that within a month or two.

Over the summer, I started getting more anxiety about his sister and 2 brother in laws, because they talked about my anxiety and said i was crazy, and just really mean to me and my boyfriend takes their side alot and hangs out with them.

Then he got back from 2 weeks being away, and i found out he was flirting with another girl through text and denied he had a girlfriend with another girl. He said he didnt do anything with them. But I get anxiety about it now and it makes me uneasy to think about and makes me not trust him as much because im always getting anxiety hes with another girl. But i dont think he is, my anxiety does

Now that I don't live with him, and i'm 4 hours away, I feel even more depressed and anxious. I can't sleep very well and I get severe anxiety if he doesnt call me once a day. This is unhealthy for me and him. I feel insecure and suicidal. I go home every weekend to see him. Except he's in florida with his parents to see his grandparents, and i havent seen him in over a week, and hes gone for another week. So i have 2 weeks to go theough classes until i can see him again. It's very stressful for me, and he doesn't really reply to me while on vacation, which is fine, but I can't help my anxiety. I break down the point where I can't function. I'm taking meds, and I'm seeing a counselor, but im not sure if its really helping. I miss him. I hate being away. I get so depressed and empty that I want to go back and pick a different college.

What do I do? I hate it in this new city, i hate school. I don't know what else to do.

0 likes, 3 replies

3 Replies

  • lisalisa67
    lisalisa67 nicole12090

    Posted

    This isnt about him love. You are experiencing co dependency.its part of an anxiety disorder you need to work on you. Then get into a relationship.
  • borderriever
    borderriever nicole12090

    Posted

    nicole

    If you are so unhappy and unable to trust your boyfriend, it will be making your Anxiety worse when you moved out and settled four hours away. Your anxiety is just making matters worse.

    The two of your boyfriends Brother in Laws calling you mentally ill will also not be doing your rlationship any good espeially if your Man actually seems to reinforce there feelings and this is not respectful and very disrespectful.

    Sad to say if you are still having problems with trust and He is not trying to placate your concerns you need to ask yourslf if the relationship has any legs over the short/medium term.

    At the moment He is on holiday and this may be a further problem for you and again all will be distracting your mood and make you feel ill.

    It seems it is you who is doing the running and He is not running by your side, going in the opposite direction. This period feel like He is subjecting you to a test of love with no obligation towards your concerns and fears.

    Have your CBT and see how this goes, it may be for your own mind you need to find someone else who will need you for what you are and not listen to tittle tattle.

    Relationships take two, not one running behind trying to always keep up Sorry.

  • phil76209
    phil76209 nicole12090

    Posted

    Ur too Gud for him. He doesnt deserve u. The flirting thing is a clear sign he didn't take the relationship seriously.

    If it was me I wud end it. Hav some self respect. Yes u miss him, but is it worth it in long term.

    I don't think he takes ur anxiety seriously otherwise he'd support u more.

    Relationships can really feed anxiety if there s problems in it.

    Hope this helps

    Phil

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