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I have been diagnosed with anxiety and agoraphobia, along with depression. I've started low intensity CBT with the local talking therapies team which I am finding to be of little help and so the doctor had prescribed 50mg Sertraline.
I Took the first tablet first thing the following morning and got several negative side effects throughout the day, but tried to push on through it. It was unpleasant but I managed right up until night. Shortly before going to bed I felt completely spaced out, out of control, and then a little later full of suicidal thoughts. I had never felt truly suicidal before and this was a very scary experience for me. Obviously, I didn't take any more of this, but it took 3 days to get back to normal and have it properly out of my system.
Saw my GP again who didn't sound surprised, and offered me sleeping tablets to deal with the feelings, agitation and frustration I had at night. I declined, not wanting to really take more of the medication that left me in that state, and especially not to combat what were now in my mind as bad drugs, with more (unnecessary) drugs.
She now prescribed citalopram 10mg tablets. I've been told to take half (so 5mg) the first day or two if I want to ease myself in slowly, and then after around a week or so to up the dose, taking 2 tablets daily to put me on 20mg, which she will then give me 20mg tablets on repeat prescription in future.
Citalopram is another SSRI, and from what I can tell, not very different at all to sertaline. Obviously I am terrified to take it after what that did to me, and feel like even if I take 5mg - which I know is a very small dose, that if I have an adverse reaction again it has such a long half life and I just have to suffer that hell again for a few days to get over it.
I Truly do want to get better and know that I need to take medication to do so, but is another SSRI really the answer rather than trying something else? Is there anyone else who has had a similar reaction to one that can say they either had the same reaction to the other, or even better to say they had the same reaction to one, but another actually worked really well?
Finally, is there any advice to help me get through this? Assuming this stuff doesn't leave me feeling like I am having a battle with my body to even stay alive, I have read enough to know that the first few days to a week or so are quite unpleasant, so it would be nice to know any tips to help make it a little easier on me if there is anything like that to help at all.
Thanks in advance for any help you can offer!
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