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Sertraline Relationships and Side effects

Posted , 4 users are following.

rich98378
rich98378

Hi All

This is my first post on here so forgive me for any rambling.

Im in my 40's Male  and suffered  with anxiety most of my life.  Infact looking back since from the age of 12. I could never stand up in class and speak without going bright red and sweating.  

I had panic attacks when i started work about silly things like talking to people even to the point of panicing when i had to enter a petrol station to pay.

I didnt understand what was happening (no internet back then)

At the age of 25 i took a long haul flight and had severe anxiety and panic attacks for the 12 hrs on a plane. I see a doctor abroad who gave me some sleeping tablets and valium for the flight home. I have flown many times since then but only by taking valium.

At the age of 30 i brought my first house split up with my long term girlfriend after 10 yrs and my mum developed cancer (in the space of a month) i went down hill rapidly and went on prozac. Haveing spent 14 yrs on prozac went from one bad relaionship to another. In the end moved abroad to try and start a new life. 4 Weeks in my mum passed away so i moved back home.

Started a new relationship which didnt go well and ended up being beaten up and put in hospital by her ex.

Stayed single for two years now i have been in a relaionship for 3 years which has up and downs along with her two children which are not the best behaved.

In some sort of madness 6 months ago i just stopped taking prozac at 40mg a day and went cold turkey. Actually felt great for a little while.

Then things went from bad to worse. Im now been on sertraline at 50mg for a month and a week at 100mg. Im also on 60 mg propranolol to help with the racing heartbeat. I also have diazepam (which i have for flying) which i take 5mg when i really cant cope.

Things dont seem to be getting any better, im questioning my self weather i want to be in a relationship as the slightest little thing seems to set of a panic attack.  Spent the night at my own home last night. Woke up at 3am sweating and having a panic attack racing thoughts going through my head cant cope cant cope want to run away (doesnt work ive tried it before) Im scared to go back to my girlfriends house (even though she has just text while im writing this) in case the kids  play up (when i mean play up one has been suspended from school twice in the last week and has been self harming) I feel like i just want to run away from everything.

I try and focus on the plus things. I have my own house, im not in debt . Dont even have a credit card and Im self employed. But the racing thoughts never seem to stop Grhhhhhh. I was hopeing that after 5 weeks on sertraline i  would have seen some improvement. But after last night im having my doubts. :-(.

A big thankyou to anyone that has managed to read all the above post ( i  know it does go on) 

If anyone is thinking of coming of there meds follow the damn instructions. and Dont just stop.

Thanks All

 

3 likes, 18 replies

18 Replies

  • Nancerella
    Nancerella rich98378

    Posted

    Hello rich98378: I am new here too. Thank you for sharing. I have been on the same meds you are for the same reasons. I know you will get good information here from folks better qualified than me. I just wanted to say hello and encourage you to keep trying to find your answers. I'm currently working with a naturopathic physician to find supplements to heal my brain chemistry without the drugs. It is a long process. We are considering neurotransmitter testing. It's a urine test that shows the level of your neurotransmitters. I'm wondering if anyone else here has had that done? Don't give up!
    • rich98378
      rich98378 Nancerella

      Posted

      Hi thanks for your comment. Just gritting my teeth and trying to get through it some how. Would just like to feel normal without taking a piece of valium now and again.
  • DYSLEXIC
    DYSLEXIC rich98378

    Posted

    you have situation depresion you have  moved fom 1 bad place to another , meds may not help , you need to get your life order . meds only work if your ill ,
    • rich98378
      rich98378 DYSLEXIC

      Posted

      Point taken about getting my life in order. I just can't seem to deal with situations. Apart from leaving my partner to deal with the problems on her own . Other people seem to be able to cope with relationship issues without turning into a mess.

      Thanks for the reply

  • DawnDedee
    DawnDedee rich98378

    Posted

    Hi Rich,

    Welcome Rich! You have just connected with a great forum with

    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee

      Posted

      Sorry Rich, you received an incomplete message because my cell phone battery went dead.

      As I was saying, you have found a site with people who care.

      My feeling after reading your post feels like chaos. And you seem to be trying to stabilize with romantic relationships. I too have done that in my past and it turned out for me as it did you, failed relationships.

      I noted that you are thinking about staying out of relationships and I agree with you. Time to yourself to work on you, work with yourself concerning grabbing a hold of and stabilization through the use of psychiatric medications and therapy, meditation and self awareness, inner reflection....what ever you think will help you.

      I hope the best for you and keep us posted so we can support you!

      💛 Dawn, USA

    • rich98378
      rich98378 DawnDedee

      Posted

      Many thanks for your nice post. I just have to put it into practice. I obviously think a lot of my girlfriend and have tried to be there for her. I know she loves me and understands how difficult it is for me. She also is on a 100 mg of sertraline struggling with cope ING with her teenage daughters problems .

      I Feel like I'm abandoning her when she needs me most especially now with the easter holidays. But it has left me in the mess I am in and cannot cope. So I have to build up the courage to tell her and I know this is going to destroy her. This is another one of them racing thoughts going through my head. I'm calmly writing this as I had a valium and zopiclone. I'm not very good at hurting people. Yours is a loverly post and people on here have been very helpful.

      Many thanks Rich x

    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee rich98378

      Posted

      Hi Rich .

      You sound like a lovely caring sensitive person. However each of us has our own burdens to bear. Let me tell you my story.

      In 2005, my three young granddaughters needed a home. Victims of severe abuse and neglect by my own daughter and her husband. When the opportunity presented itself that could allow me to take custody of them, rescue them, I jumped at the chance! Eventually I adopted them.

      At that time I had been married for one year to a man I had already been with for 13 years. My granddaughters were ages 14 months, 20 months and 5 years old. Family means everything to me and but not to my husband and he was not blood related to my granddaughters.

      He gave me an ultimatum, "if you keep the children, I WILL divorce you." I chose the children. His choice hurt me beyond belief, but we had both made the best choice for ourselves. He divorced me in 2007 on Valentine's Day.

      Life happens Rich. People part and move on all the time. Perhaps Easter is not the best time to break the news because a holiday conjoined with a break up is misery. I now despise Valentine's Day!

      We all have to make honest choices for ourselves. We have only one life to live and the time we spend with anyone is an investment. I regret my 14 year investment into my ex husband.

      Just food for thought.

      Take care,

      💛 Dawn, USA

    • rich98378
      rich98378 DawnDedee

      Posted

      Thanks for the post. Wow how did you cope with all that I shall never know. Being given a decision to abandon your grand children.

      I have split with my partner this morning as I really couldn't cope with everything that's been going on. Felt really bad about it. Still don't feel any better, now just feel guilty. Time heals I know. Just that empty and sad feeling and the panic is slowly kicking in.

      Just hoping the tablets kick in soon. I'm not allowed any more diazepam. I Have a few left . Don't know why I can't cope with anything other people manage just fine and have gone through a lot more than me. I suppose only time will tell. Thanks for sharing you story x

  • natalie99981
    natalie99981 rich98378

    Posted

    Rich give it another few weeks really didn't see much improvement till the 7 week mark. Have you gone to talk to someone ? Might've worth a shot.I did find that walking and listening to YouTube clips about getting rid of racing thoughts etc really helped me and type in things like how to rid negative thoughts or how to think positive.

    I no longer take any of the Valium which for the first 6 weeks I did haven't even thought about it and now when I go walking I listen to music lol so the meds have certainly helped me ...

    • rich98378
      rich98378 natalie99981

      Posted

      Thanks for the reply. I know I should give it more time just had a really bad night last night and thought I was losing my mind. Have taken half a valium tonight and still sweating . Thinking of making an appointment with the doctors next week and see if he can recommend someone to talk to. To be honest not very good with expressing my emotions . Then I found this forum and couldn't stop writing. Thanks for your support and taking the time to reply
    • kellii50
      kellii50 rich98378

      Posted

      hi rich, sorry to hear your going through a rough time, like myself i was in a realationship that i had to break of i felt bad for hurting him as i also feel awful if i had to hurt someone plus i still had strong feelings for him, it did get easier as i started to plan things for myself and what would be best to help me in life, the more i hear things about him i know i done the right thing that was almost 2 yrs ago it has flew past i am much happier now and over it. about the racing mind (i call it the hampster wheel) the sertraline does help but it takes weeks to fully work i take 50mg, i hated the mind racing it kept me awake over the stupid of things i had no control over it i still have it but not as bad as iv learn to live with it, dont think about or worry about what meds you are taking just take them try to forget about them and accept that they are part of you get on with your day, try not to worry to much about your partner if you break up she is not you and will get over it better than you think, keep talking to people dont feel selfish its now about getting youself better . best wishes
    • rich98378
      rich98378 kellii50

      Posted

      Thanks for your reply. I did bite the bullet and split up with my partner this morning. Felt really awful about it. I still have strong feelings for her and feel guilty as I know she's going through a rough time to. To be honest she was understanding and said it's to much for anyone to cope with and didn't blame me and told me to get on with my life and to stop blaming myself for not being able to cope. I'm sure the texts will eventually turn nasty but hey ho. I like the hamster wheel analysis made me smile. Thanks for your kind words it means a lot x
    • Digsby
      Digsby rich98378

      Posted

      Hi Rich,

      My marriage of 20 years ended in divorce a few years back when my wife met someone else. It came out of the blue and nearly destroyed me but I did come to accept that it was the best (for her if not for me). I'm now in a relationship with someone who doesn't understand my depression at all (even though she has suffered in the past and her daughter does). The hardest thing is when there is love and affection in a relationship but daily life is overwhelming for whatever reason. I too compare my coping skills (or lack of them!) to other people. But we are who we are. A lot is to do with genetics and our upbringing (however happy or sad it was). Factors beyond our control. You wouldn't want to live most other people's lives - however great they may look on the outside, we all hold up a mask to the world. We all develop different ways of coping. Mine seem to have broken down somewhat in the last few years but that doesn't mean that we can't find new coping skills - it will take time and practice. Counselling may be a very good idea. It's not a sign of weakness. You would take advice from a good friend (or a stranger on a health forum!) Health professionals have a wealth of experience and know what really works because they see lives transformed every day. In the meantime you will find lots of free help online with those anxious thoughts, self-esteem issues, etc.

      It's a brave step you have taken to give yourself some space. You have not run away from your girlfriend and her children. You have given them space and yourself as well before the situation got too destructive. There's no reason why you can't be supportive from afar. My girlfriend is a lot more supportive via email/text than she is in person(!) I'll leave it there mate cos I'm rambling now but please don't beat yourself up. You are doing your best to get your head straight so that you can be a better person in the future. But you are who you are and that's ok at this moment in time. Don't place too much pressure on yourself. Learn to be gentle with yourself and compassion for others will come with it.

      Let us know how you get on. There is a way forward and you will reach your goal!

      Digsby

    • rich98378
      rich98378 Digsby

      Posted

      Thanks for your reply. Deep down I know I have done the right thing. Now its just sticking to it. Easier said than done. We have split up before on more than one occasion and always end up getting back together. I'm struggling with guilt at leaving her even though neither of us has gone of with someone else. We were friends before we started going out and have a lot of friends in common. I'm happy to be a friend to her but not in a relationship. I can be more supportive if I'm not in the situation. If that makes sense. Most people say you should cut her of completely. Move on and get on with your life. Not easy as I'm still having panic attacks each day and night. Grhhhh hoping the sertraline will kick in soon just to make life a bit easier. I'm not after a miracle just some sanity lol
    • kellii50
      kellii50

      Posted

      Hi rich, glad your taking steps forward, your partner sounds like a nice person just hope it dosnt turn nasty but if so just stay strong and dont bite, remember you are not responabile for someones actions but you are for your own, hope the med helps you when they settle down just keep getting advice and chatting with people, good luck
    • rich98378
      rich98378 kellii50

      Posted

      I didnt bite when I got a couple of not so good texts and she apologised. It was me that ended it and I feel so bad about it. The hamster wheel is spinning again lol. Have another appointment at the docs tomorrow. If I take any more tablets I'm going to start rattling. At least I made it to work today but got another day of tomorrow. Talking on here is great. It takes my mind of things for a while. I'm just wishing the weeks away now until hopefully these tablets start working... Thanks for the message
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