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Severe Anxiety- how to cope?

Posted , 3 users are following.

GravyLover
GravyLover

I am 21 and have recently been diagnosed with sever anxiety- not really sure how to feel about this. There is so much stigma that derives from mental health illnesses that I can't help but feel like I'm crazy- apparently that is normal? I have always been a worrier and a stresshead (as people would call me), however, since meeting my partner over a year ago things have got worse. It isn't him at all- it is me- or my anxiety I should say. In past relationships, I have always been worried that I'm not good enough, they will cheat, it's not working, they don't love me etc- I should probably mention I have also been cheated on twice by two partners. After my second relationship I took some time to myself, travelled, explored myself and the world around me and really became comfortable with who I was as a person- sure I could lose a bit of weight and exercise more but everyone thinks that right? Anyway, I met (and fell in love) with my partner unexpectedly and before I knew it all my worries came back. Since then, my anxiety has become worse- I don't just worry about the relationship, I worry about everything! Even when people tell me thoughts are normal I do nothing but panick. I feel guilty doing/saying things and for some reason feel the need to tell my mum everything! Even embarassing stuff- my current worry being 'I find same sex interaction more appealing- does that make me gay?' Even though I am perfectly straight and studies have shown this is perfectly normal. I have to tell my mum though right because I'm not normal? As you can see, my anxiety has taken the shape of a big dark cloud over my life and well, I hate it. I don't think anyone understands truly the effect it is having one me. I have just started cognitive behaviour therapy but if I'm honest can't see any hope in my anxiety decreasing- or is that my anxiety talking? I don't know! This is the first time I have actually written this down and although I feel silly and embarassed, I also feel like I can take a deep breath! Guess I'm just looking for some kind of discussion... help!

1 like, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • chris14174
    chris14174 GravyLover

    Posted

    Hi did your parents Worry alot.? I just feel anxious when I'm down and don't want to go out and don't want to speak or see anyone. I don't understand it at all again is this anxiety? Don't feel embarrassed there's alot of people just like you
    • GravyLover
      GravyLover chris14174

      Posted

      Hey, no not at all. Quite the opposite actually, I dont know my dad but my mum is fine- she actually calms me down alot. My worst days seem to be when I'm tired and miserable- like today! I haven't been sleeping either due to worrying, I'm lucky to get 6 hours a night which then leads to be being moody the day after leading to worrying leading to anxiety.. its a viscous circle! One thing I am learning though is that its okay to do things by yourself- it helps you find the person you really want to be without any added social pressure. I love bingo and although people may judge I sometimes just go spend a few hours there by myself! Or I watch a cheesy romcom by myself stuffing myself with fatty food just because well I can! I know what you mean though sometimes I think well maybe its just my anxiety.. I think keeping a good balance is crucial. Take time by yourself to spend however you want to spend it but also try and make the effort on some occasions to go out and socialise regardless of how hard it will be! I got invited to go out today but said no and I regret it now so I would say today was due to my anxiety!
    • chris14174
      chris14174 GravyLover

      Posted

      Oh that's great that you find ways to deal with it. I unfortunately am struggling to leave the house unless I really Really have to. I will but look a mess and can't even be bothered to do anything about it. That is really not me at all. Hope your anxiety calms down. I think mine be a build up of things. Work has been rubbish at mo.
  • yvey71138
    yvey71138 GravyLover

    Posted

    Hi .

    I was told I had severe anxiety stress .. That is going back over 30 years ago .. And it did get better through time .. Sometimes you just learn to live with it and learn to control it and meeting people who have went through it to brings comfort , you just become stronger and I had a good doctor who didn't always supply me with medication .. Talking is the best way to people who will listen or who understand .. But I have been ill recently and that has brought me great anxiety .. But I know worrying want help as it makes it worse as it can be a vicious circle .. So I know I have to make myself stop as now I am having other symptoms that will just escalate ..

    So guys I know it seems easier said than done .. But I know keeping a diary just writing things down then you look back in a month you see your anxieties getting less .. It might not appeal to everyone but keeping occupied and not dwelling on things to much .. It's training the brain to think differently ..

    Best wishes .. Yvey

  • ozzie1961
    ozzie1961 GravyLover

    Posted

    I am so sorry for you my freind ,

    you are so young and have a whole life ahead of you.

    I myself am 53 and have only had this dibiltating illness known as Anxiety for 3 years and I myself am aware of what triggered it in the beginning.

    When you mentioned , quote " my anxiety has taken the shape of a big dark cloud over my life and well, I hate it. I don't think anyone understands truly the effect it is having one me." I am thinking this is probably the illness itself telling you this.

    Anxiety for me is such an isolating disabilty that makes us want to believe we are so alone in our distress , where the truth of the matter is you nor I am alone in this.

    I totally relate to you anxiety of how others percieve us to be and for me its all about what my head tells me that person is thinking about me only causes me more distress.

    And I tend to get into a full cocktail of explanation while instead of simplifying the issue I tend to go so over board and over emphasize what is normally a silly little issue .

    But this again is my disability of Anxiety.

    It is a big dark cloud hanging over me, you described that very articulately and as for your feelings regarding same sex interaction I find you incredibly mature and secure in your own sexuality.

    I feel sexuallity has become so over emphasized as a world issue we have all forgotten to be human and tend to use issues like this to avoid other more important issues that we dont want to address in our lives.

    May your road to recovery and mine be fulfilling and real.

    May we find that inner peace and freedom in restoration and personal growth and all become better people first to ourselves and then to those around us.

    PJ

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