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Should I see a doctor?

Posted , 4 users are following.

chain_smoker
chain_smoker

Hey everyone,

Well I'm brand new here. Thought this would be the perfect place to spill out the contents of my mind and ask opinions. Apologies in advanced if this is a little long...

So basically I'm wondering if I'm "normal" or should get myself down the doctors...

A bit of background. My life has always been pretty good. However, my mother became severely mentally ill when I was about 4. My father looked after her a lot and so we were pretty poor. Few days without electric and that kind of thing but no shortage of love. We were a regular family.

Has always been in the back of my (and my older sisters) mind that my mothers illnesses could be passed on (we were told this years ago).

Well anyway, more recently my mother has passed away...a year ago now. And also my wife has had an affair, with a women! I spend a lot of time working away which gets lonely too.

So what I'm really asking I suppose is are all my negative thoughts something I need help for or just part of having a tough year. Let me list a few that concern me most (and I'm sorry if some of these seem silly)...

- I don't sleep even though I'm tired. I just can't bring myself to go to bed. I often fall asleep on the sofa because I'm just too tired to stay awake anymore.

- I am terrified of stupid things. My job, to the point where I avoid places. Waking my kids and sometimes facing people.

- Every so often I just want to run away on my own and be depressed. It's like I go in to almost a blank state.

- Lonliness

- Some reckless behaviour (which I don't really want to reveal on here)

- General constant tiredness, disinterest and nervousness.

- Constant eating.

- A bit of paranoia

- Negative attitude

I have had all of these for a long time, probably since childhood but more recently it has all become a lot worse. I've always felt like I'm a bit mad, but I'm becoming to be convinced of it as they get worse.

Now what is really holding me back is that no-one I know has noticed, so maybe I'm imagining everything? And I don't want anyone thinking that I'm making it up for attention or anything like that. I'm especially reluctant to see a doctor for much the same reason. If he says its nothing I will feel very silly and will have to explain to my family that I'm being an idiot...don't really fancy that.

I've done my research and it's like I've had most symptoms, but not really severely.

So...is it all in my head, or could it be something more?

Thank you for taking the time to read such an essay.

0 likes, 11 replies

11 Replies

  • a74156
    a74156 chain_smoker

    Posted

    I'm not a doctor so I can't say but I do tHANKYOU would benefit from therapy. You don't sound silly at all. You are tired stressed and have a lot to deal with as do a lot of people. Situations in life can get hard. We can go through some hard seasons and sometimes we just need some one to talk to. You'll find friends here. I also still think you should ask your doctor to recommend you to a therapist. Not because you could be mentally ill but because everyone needs to be able to talk to someone and who better than someone who can't share your secrets like a professional theripist. Hang in there. One step at a timesmile
  • gillian20097
    gillian20097 chain_smoker

    Posted

    Hi.

    I think the fact that you have come here with your concerns means that there is something defiantly to be concerned about so what harm is it going to do to reach out to your doctor for a little extra support.!?

    Anxiety and depression are as you say " all in your head" but I know where your coming from. Like you,I question my questions. Sometimes I think that maybe my medication is making me feel the way I feel and maybe if I came off it all,I'd be ok but I'm to scared to do that in case I'm not ok and go spiralling and have to start all over again.

    My mum or Dad never had any mental issues but my Gran did and my auntie does.

    If what you feel is steadily getting worse and more noticeable to yourself,then best to get to the docs and get it nipped in the bud...Even if it's manageable for you I still think you would benefit from a little chat with a professional xx

  • sarah86347
    sarah86347 chain_smoker

    Posted

    I dont think mental health is hereditary so I think you are safe there(just my opinion)

    I think you can attribute the way you feel to the situation. Even if nobody has noticed, the way you feel is the way you feel.

    Talking therapy like other people have suggested is a good idea! 

    • a74156
      a74156 sarah86347

      Posted

      Some mental health issues are genetic while others are not. It depends on the mental health issue.
    • sarah86347
      sarah86347 a74156

      Posted

      Im glad someone has a different opinion so we can have a good discussion. I dont think mental health issues are an illness, I think they are learnt so that's why I dont think they can be passed down. Obviously not learnt on purpose but people using coping mechanisms that arnt necessarily good for them and this becomes a habit. I think the brain is like a muscle, and the more you stimulate parts of it, the more strong and prevalent some feelings/thoughts become. What do you think x
  • chain_smoker
    chain_smoker

    Posted

    Thank you for all the replies. I'm shocked so many took the time to read all that smile

    I've never been too great at talking to people in any capacity really so talking to a doctor or any professional fills me with dread and embarrassment.

    I think I will try just seeing how things go. I'm quite strong and think I can pull myself through most things

    Thank you everyone

    • gillian20097
      gillian20097 chain_smoker

      Posted

      I hope you do. You seem to have a good handle on things so if you think you will be ok,then I'm sure you will smile

      If it persists though..don't hesitate to speak to your doctor.Why struggle when there is help out there xx

    • chain_smoker
      chain_smoker gillian20097

      Posted

      I know you are right and I don't even know why but I'm very nervous about a doctor saying "well you're going to feel bad, your life is bad right now"

      Suppose it is a pride thing. I dont mind something being wrong, but I don't want to put it out there if I'm fine

  • Aspinan
    Aspinan chain_smoker

    Posted

    Hi there, what you describe sound horrendous your obviously very resilient and brave. Until you go see your GP you don't know what he/she will say. You are in control so you can take their advise or leave it but you won't know if or how beneficial it could be until you search it or try it. A decent doc won't just say your feeling bad because of your circumstances especially given the symptoms your describing, you may feel bad but it appears to have gone beyond just "feeling bad", being terrified of stupid things isn't feeling bad, going into a blank state isn't feeling bad. All the cognative aspects can be changed through the help of a good therapist... Give it a whirl. 
    • chain_smoker
      chain_smoker Aspinan

      Posted

      Thank you. After a weird episode yesterday (literally feeling sick with fear) about going to work I've decided this cant go on!

      I love my job and I work in different places everyday so its silly.

      Contacted my doctors for an urgent appointment and got 26th. Dont you love the NHS smile

      Now all I have to do is pluck the courage to actually go and figure out what on earth to say when I get there...

    • gillian20097
      gillian20097 chain_smoker

      Posted

      Write it down. Sit down and think of all you are feeling and all you want to get across and then give what you wrote to your doc.

      Just say you wrote it down so you didn't forget anything.

      They are marvellous with these urgent appointments aren't they? My urgent appointment when I started with anxiety was 3 weeks away so I went to A+E and asked to see the crisis team xx

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