Should I trust when I've been so hurt?

I could not place wen this attack happened, and if te two friends had anything to do wit the rape. I can however understand how your Mother and yourself must feel and that needs addressing with a course of treatment so you can talk out the attack

Did you report the rape to the Police. This would seem to be an important thing to do.

Are you married or not, can you have children or not and why do you feel unable to adopt after a rape ?? I cannot understand the reasons if this is so.

Please talk to your GP regards your PTSD and if now still possible explain what happened to the Police, you need a facilitator to help you move on, your GP and Social Services may help you move on. You are not a bad person you need to understand the people who attacked you needs to be jailed

BOB

Hi border river, my appointments were cancelled to allow my physical health to pick up, but my named doctor is useless at supporting what I'm trying to do as she will only offer me anti depressants which I don't want at all.  I need her to do something but non chemical, which is why I've spoken to other health outlets about ways to cope. I have written to my counselling service providers and the person who runs it is yet to contact me back.  There are things they can do, but it's now clear my doctor needs to support me, but without chemicals as in general my ibs won't cope with this and I don't usually suffer from depression as I've asked before, the depression I have is due to the ptsd and in my mind if I can get to these counselling sessions that really will help, but it's how I do it.  Let's see what my doctor says at my next face-to-face appointment in a couple of weeks time.  Sent to border river, damn computer!

Hello, Sam,

I'm very sorry about your troubles, and that you had to become one more victim of the worst of human beings, a thing which, as you have found, destroys the ability to trust.

It is natural that you feel that way. That which hurts or saddens us, we do our best to avoid in future, and part of that avoidance is in never trusting anyone again. I know that from experiences of my own. But does not trusting people to keep ourselves safe from further harm or unhappiness mean that no one can be trusted? No, it doesn't. Just as the existence of worthless rapists doesn't mean that all men are bad.

So the thing to keep in mind is that it is wise and instinctive to distrust, but that good people do exist and might enter your life one day, and show by their behaviour over time that they can be trusted. Even then you would still be wary of believing in them, through fear of being proved wrong. But that wouldn't mean it's going to happen.

Step by step a person can earn your trust through how they treat you, how they speak to you and so on. It isn't a matter of being able to turn on your trust of people again like a light-switch. It can't be. You've every reason not to trust people. Our brains are geared for that, for our safety and survival. But don't think it means you'll never find a fine person who will show you just how good some people are. There's every chance you will.

Paul