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So anxious it's making me feel sick

Posted , 1 user is following.

pen1976
pen1976

Hi,

I have suffered with anxiety for years and my job doesn't help, my boss blames me for things that are not my fault and try as I might I just can't seem to get another job to get away!

Well it's back to work tomorrow and the very thought makes me feel sick and very teary, I just do not want to be there however I have to go as I have a mortgage and two children to pay for, I feel genuinely ill just thinking about walking through those doors and having to face that obnoxious, sexist, arrogant man, I have nobody to turn to at work as it's a family business and I just get a "you know what he is like, ignore him" response, he is even more mean to me when he finds out I have said anything, it feels like a vicious circle that I can't break, I don't know how to calm down, I know I won't sleep tonight!

0 likes, 9 replies

9 Replies

  • marlene21102
    marlene21102 pen1976

    Posted

    Hi does he do the bullying to males,unless they are young males.? What miserable human being ( put loosely) he is .What he needs is a dose of his own medicine ,just because you work for someone don't give them the right to do this to you,words fail me truly do.All to often this goes on,and people like yourself suffer this bully don't see it repercussions to his bad behaviour they never do.Do you live in UK ? As there are laws regarding this oik thats all he is, I've never had this done myself but have seen others who have years ago and some 40 years on they've recalled that time,like you she was a nice human being.

       Is there no one you can go see legally for advice,find out your rights first hand. If he thought for one minute this bullying was going to hit his wallet he'd be worried,he really must be STUPID or PLAIN THICK.

       So put your foot down and say no more you will let this go on.This ike will find someone else they always do. Don't let anyone put you down like this,go to job centre explain what you've said to this site, you've got children to watch out for and last thing they want is a mum or dad this unhappy,and with anxiety.sorry your being made to feel like this dreading going to your job, wait and see what others on site suggest  tonight maybe they've had this awful thing happen and how they dealt with it  Hope so  Good Luck

     

     

    • pen1976
      pen1976 marlene21102

      Posted

      I am in the UK, and yes, I have taken advice which usually means seeing the person in charge of the man that bullies me, however it's his brother and it never helps, I could leave on constructive dismissal but I can't afford to be without pay, or am too scared to risk it.

      no he does not do this to men, in fact most of the time that I have caught him blaming me for something is on an email to one of the male members of staff when he has messed up so blames me (I am his PA and have access to his emails)

      in the last company I worked for, I worked for a really powerful man who treated me so well and was always polite and friendly, this was a huge company, I work for a relatively small company and can't understand why this man is so mean, it hurts my feelings so much.

      do I risk walking out?

  • richard89308
    richard89308 pen1976

    Posted

    find another job first if you really feel that you have had enough of the situation.

    Sometimes it is better to just move on especially if you are involved in a family business.

    richard

    • pen1976
      pen1976 richard89308

      Posted

      I have applied for so many and never get the job or sometimes not even an interview, I will keep trying, thank you
  • marlene21102
    marlene21102 pen1976

    Posted

    He's the weak one not you,hard to walk out of any job these days.,there good these bullies and oh so sly.but believe me they know his character ,but keep a bully sweet they know it could be them next.Penn that's why they get away with it. Keep a diary on his remarks to you.there so sly normally say things when no ones around. Last thing they want ,there just little nobody's ,call them Billy no mates ,you've got every one here behind you ,Who's he got end of the day?

        Keep eye out for work elsewhere I agree. If any justice your come out the winner.

         How sad is he.? Stay watching for post maybe some one legally minded could do you a private post on this . X

    • pen1976
      pen1976 marlene21102

      Posted

      Thank you for being so supportive, you are right, he is a bully, I wish I had you with me at work lol! He does say things when nobody is around and he does belittle me if people are, I will give the diary a go, maybe see if I can get some better advice?

      i would be so grateful if there was someone who could give me legal advice, I really do not want to go in tomorrow, I'm filled with dread, chin up and battle through, I'm sure I can get another job, just hope it comes soon, and I feel bad for anyone that gets my job after me!

    • marlene21102
      marlene21102 pen1976

      Posted

      You just keep you head held high,get an attitude if you need to,yea I'd sort him out he wouldn't like me in his company,I'm always for the under dog 100 per cent. Not a decent way to treat another.never met him but I don't like the IRK that he is..how old is he Pen?old enough to know better. Couldn't get away with in real mans world.hence he's targeting you. Have you got close family near by if so go have word with them over this job situation

         As you say chin up your come out on top.promise  your way better than him your worth more remember that tomorrow x.

    • pen1976
      pen1976 marlene21102

      Posted

      In his fifties sixth divorce on the go! Lol total no mark to be fair, no I have no family, just me and two kids, I have no idea where my parents are or if they are alive, I'm nearly 40 and have no desire to find them! 

      I will ill try to look up tomorrow, thank you, you made me smile if nothing else, your tough huh! Wish I was like you xx

    • marlene21102
      marlene21102 pen1976

      Posted

      Sad your on your own dealing with this,On his 6th wife well no surprise there,he's got history hey wonder Why ? Bet they ran to, He's one of life's Jerks  I'm a former service wife had to be tough to get through that mostly raising my 2 children on my own period no family around me to for years Penn .so one has to stand there ground.people know not to mess with you.

          I'd certainly give him good run for his money.

      obviously he's not learnt much for all of his years .he will end up lonely old man way he behaves. Come on site lets know how your day went x

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