SO DEPRESSED!!! HELP

Posted , 7 users are following.

i'm so sad about realizing i have suffered a prolapse. I'm only 23 years old, and i've only had one pregnancy. i dont know what to do, because i do not want to have surgery but i feel like im too far gone to fix through pelvic exercises. i feel so depressed, and embarrassed. image

does anyone have any advice or any shred of hope that i could correct this without surgery?

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11 Replies

  • Posted

    Please don't give up on exercises. I am an 84 year old woman who had four pregnancies year after year for 4 years, when I was in my twenties, and just a few years ago discovered that I have a prolapse. I went to a pelvic floor exercises Workshop where we were given a lot of exercises including the pelvic floor exercises and it has helped. I am now waiting to be given a pessary to hold everything in place.

    I was also given exercises for bladder control, and touch wood, they have worked, and I don't need to use pads any more.

    Go and see your GP who will refer you to a gynaecologist.

    The Workshop I went to was run privately, and there were many young girls there, so you are not alone.

    I don't know where you live, but if you Google it, you might find one of these Workshops near you.

    If these exercises worked for me, an old woman, they will work better for you, because you are young, and your muscles are in better shape.

    Don't get depressed about this, as there is a lot you can do to avoid surgery.

    All the very best and a happy New Year.xx

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  • Posted

    Hiya, sorry to hear you are going through this. I discovered I had a prolapse when I was your age and it was quite the shocker for me too BUT there are many things that can help before surgery becomes an option.

    First get the official diagnosis as once they do the official tests they will be able to assess the the level the prolapse is at and give it a grading 1-4.

    From there you will start a pelvic floor course with a trained nurse that uses a biofeedback machine to help engage your pelvic floor muscles. You use this every night for 8 weeks and see the nurse weekly to check your progress.

    If you want more children surgery will not be performed until you are finished having children as there is always the possibility of it happening again during childbirth and so the surgery would be pointless.

    Surgery is always the last option and the doctors will work with you to try any alternative before this.

    I understand how hard this is especially at such a young age but you will get through it.

    If you need to talk at all or have any more questions, feel free to message me.

    Rachael

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  • Posted

    Hi which country are you in? Was it a difficult birth or rapid when baby came out (mine was in uk but later at 35). Are you being affected much by it? I always had a low uterus but combination of birth, coil and infections from it, and some lifting necessitated two operations, the last 16 Dec.

    I would recommend you see gp asap and get referred to urogynae consultant. They can assess what you have found and suggest treatment. Some prolapses can be treated with pelvic floor exercises or removable pessaries. Unfortunately mine progressed from grade 2 to 3 so that wasn't an option.

    Be careful what you look at on internet too! There is good information on the bsug (british society uro gynacology) about prolapse and management.

    In the meantime if you do something which involves heavy lifting it may be worth reducing it until you see a consultant. Take care

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  • Posted

    I had my first baby at 25, which ended up with me having an episiotomy and forceps in theatre.

    a few weeks after healing from broken down stitches and a messed up perineum I also had a prolapse very similar to the picture. I had bladder (cystocele) and bowel (rectocele) prolapse.

    I saw my GP and a nurse attempted to insert a vaginal pessary to help which was painful and unsuccessful and ended up with my period being very uncomfortable and heavy after the attempt.

    I was referred for physio NHS which I was told I have next to no pelvic floor movement. I was given machine to help strengthen the muscles. did almost nothing as I had to return it after a month.

    i had private medical cover through my employer and it covered me seeing a private gynaecologists and the result was surgery.

    I thought at first it worked well however after recovery it hadnt done much at all and they also widened my vaginal entrance (despite no issues for me, as in no pain when having intercourse) and apparently tightened inside by removing scar tissue from my broken down stitches from episiotomy.

    a year after I ended up falling pregnant and having my little boy. I had surgery on the NHS late into my maternity leave and now my son is 26 months, I still have a prolapse no better than when I was 25, I'm now 29 with a pre schooler about to turn 2 and a toddler, so lots of lifting and the feeling my vagina will fall out any minute as I get a heavy dragging feeling.

    I can relate to how miserable, depressing, and embarrassing it feels, you are not alone. After pregnancy you feel with so much and feeling like your womans parts have basically had it is a horrible feeling as a young woman 😭

    I honestly wish I could tell you that after, GP, Physio and 2x surgery it would help but my reality is I cannot even wear a tampon and my husband is not allowed anywhere down there as would hate for him to see things as I feel hideous.

    I can reassure you that as time goes on the less I think about it but it is still a daily thing.

    You should defo see your GP as you may have a much better result than myself so try and stay positive.

    There are plenty of times that I think why me..

    all the women out there and of all the births all of my friends and family why am I the only one. Until I went through it and the more vocal I was the more people I realised also struggle and experience prolapse, especially young woman after birth when really your body should be at its youngest and strongest as in the "bounce back" and "your body is designed to cope with childbirth" I feel so angry when hear this as I feel like it's all lies and misleading for my experience.

    If your prolapse is visible then pelvic floor exercises will not do much at all, but still so them! But no they will not 'fix it'.

    Please try not to let the thoughts consume you as it is upsetting, if you dont want surgery you do not have to do this at all but seek the professional advice available starting at your GP.

    XoX

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  • Posted

    thank you all for sharing your experiences... ive felt alone, so it helps some.

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  • Posted

    HI there,

    Unfortunately we all have our horror birth stories to share ! I was only 18 years old and the incompentant Dr (who should have known better ) decided to pierce my waters when the baby was coming out of the birth canal . The baby rushed out way too fast and it felt like my guts were being pulled out! Since then I had prolapsed bladder prolapsed uterus , had 2 rectocele and cystocele sugerys ..,entrocele surgery , my urethra taped because a bladder suspension quickly failed and a hysterectomy for prolapsed uterus . It took me 20 years to get something done at first because the same doctor embarrassed me a few months after it happened and I just went in my shell.

    i am now 60 years old .

    So my advice to you is go to a GP as soon as you can and be open and persistent until you get referred to a good gynaecologist who will examine you thoroughly and get the surgery you desperately need. I wouldn’t muck around with pessaries etc . I went down that road to but it always ends up in surgery anyway ! Of course pelvic floor exercises are good but it won’t fix the problem if it’s too far gone. So don’t worry just keep persisting to you get the help that you need and I’m sure you will.

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    • Posted

      thats honestly pretty shocking bc i had a VERY quick birth, i pushed through two contractions. but my daughter was shoving her whole arm out with her head, and maybe that also contributed, as she tore me pretty bad. i hope to get it treated as soon as possible even tho i dont have much hope unless its surgery i feel. thank you so much for responding

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    • Posted

      Oh I'm so sorry if I scared you with all that!

      Im really sorry that youve had such a difficult time . I just want you to get help asap . As I mentioned I waited way too long because of an inconsiderate Dr who caused the issue .

      Re any future surgery .. do you have anyone that can help at home with any lifting of your child and heavier chores that you won't able to do for quite a while?

      That certainly is the big issue afterwards to make sure your surgery is all okay .

      Im looking forward to your progress with this . Keep us posted so we can know how your going with it all .

      ps The gyney will tell you to bear down when he examines you so make sure you give it your best effort so he can see and feel your prolapse cause sometimes it all slips back be your your lying down on examination . I had to go to a woman gynaecologist once because of my uterus prolapse and she very kindly examined me while standing up on a little step because others couldn’t find it lying down

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    • Posted

      Oh.. thats not good Jenny!

      I had finished having my family so the solution that was offered was a hysterectomy .. so yep it worked .

      I certainly hope that you can find help with yours .

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  • Posted

    you are still very young and the chances are kegels and pelvic floor exercises will work for you, go on you tube and search for DR BRI she really is good at explaining all about prolapse .. i have done my own research for help and exercises as in england there is not a lot of support thats why i have joined this forum also dr BRI Has some really good talks with other pelvic floor experts, michelle lyons is another expert to listen to... you are not alone lovely lady.....

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