Social Anxiety

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Hi im 27 and I've been dealing with social anxiety, depression and few other mental illnesses. I'm feeling very sad and alone. I grew up in an mentality and physically abusive household. I was the outsider in my family. But as I got older I still have no family support. A when I try my father tries to take over my life and say mean things to make me feel bad about myself. I think he does because he knows he will get to me. It's hurtful because I need the support of living family members. Except my husband who I have lived with since 17 yes. He travels and can be gone months at a time. We only speak 1 maybe 2 times at night. When he's home we are so good with eachother but when he's gone my anxiety is worse then ever. I can't sleep I feel paranoid. I have dreams of spiders every night that constantly wakes me up. I'm a full time student I'm the nicest person I like to help everyone. I try to make friends at school or anywhere I go but I just feel there is somthing wrong with me. I feel stupid when I talk as I can't put sentences together I feel my mouth is moving weird. I feel that's all wveryone is paying attention to me thinking I'm weird. I only get along with my children and niecewho is 9 yrs old. But I'm starting to wonder if my life will be lonely because I try to be a social person?

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  • Posted

    Your going through a tough time but you are among friends here

    You did'nt say if you were on medication talk to your doctor about it and

    consider therapy.

    Go and get the help you need and deserve

    Stay Strongcool

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  • Posted

    Hey there,

    Sorry to hear about all of this, Mindy.

    Do you have a therapist or a counsellor or someone who is trained to help?

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  • Posted

    Do you see a therapist? I think it would help you. You have some issues with some toxic family members that need to be addressed so you can get to a place where you can let that stuff go. A mentally abusive person, a narcissistic person would never be able to raise you or teach you love and it doesnt seem you understand that yet. You will never get the love or approval from your family you are looking for and thats okay because you have your own family now but therapy would be very useful. Being social whilst carrying around anxiety is a challange so dont gets down over it. Its lovely to spend time with your children. Im sorry your husbnd has a job that requires such an intense amount if travel, that part stinks. Most travel a bit but not months at a time.  Maybe you can join a club as you noted your a full student. Best to try and meet people in the same boat as you a full time student and has children that way the activities can include everyone and its easier.
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  • Posted

    You're very strong to be able to not have your husband around a lot, especially with anxiety. Sounds like you've been through a lot. I definitely suggest counseling.
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