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Posted , 7 users are following.

mami5
mami5

I feel so lonely, empty, worthless and hopeless.  Can't stop sleeping during day, got so bad my GP has banned me from driving incase I have sleep apnoea.  Turning into a stir crazy hermit stuck in the house not able to use my car.  Some new year 2016 is going to be!  Can't see the point carrying on anymore.  Life is such a struggle.

2 likes, 22 replies

22 Replies

  • simon8173
    simon8173 mami5

    Posted

    Hey Mami5, life is a struggle but we keep on fighting!! Anybody can just give up but it's the fighting depression that sets us apart. We do this together, in the knowledge that we are here to support each other. Hang in there buddy 👍
    • mami5
      mami5 simon8173

      Posted

      Thank you for your reply.  BPD is making me more suicidal, can't get rid of all the negative thoughts. x
  • angela43016
    angela43016 mami5

    Posted

    Hey you, it's awful isn't it?  You are sleeping due to the fact that you are prob not sleeping at night. Why should you be worth any less than anyone else? Sometimes we measure ourselves against other people and we shouldn't, they may appear to be something but we are all human and should not be thought of by what we achieve rather than what we are! Maybe they are jealous of the nice person you are x
  • fee25
    fee25 mami5

    Posted

    Hey mami5, 

    I know where you're coming from, I too cannot stop sleeping - I literally can sleep for 17 hours at a time, it feels awful but I'd rather sleep than deal with life! 

    Could you start going on little walks to get yourself out? You could walk to the shop to get a paper, walk around the park, or just walk to walk. When I get particularly bad I walk to Asda, it's about a two minute walk so I don't feel overfaced but it gets me out and moving so however short, it can be a nice break. 

    You're definitely not worthless and you're not alone, you have friends here, everyone is here to support you xxx

  • patricia44773
    patricia44773 mami5

    Posted

    Oh, Mami, I  am so sorry.  I don't feel that you are getting the right help.  I feel so angry that you are still struggling so badly. 

    Please just hold on and don't do anything drastic, you don't want to hurt those boys, do you?  You are a lovely person, stay hopeful please.  You are special to me.

    Patxxxx

    • mami5
      mami5 patricia44773

      Posted

      Hi Pat, so sorry to worry you all the time.  Im getting DBT with a very good psychologist and group every week.  It is very hard and painful though.  Unfortnately life is still a struggle for me.  Axxx
  • lattifa7777
    lattifa7777 mami5

    Posted

    Hello mami5, are you on any meds? If so how long have you been on them? I'm having a dip too, but trying real hard to fight it, keep going to ur Dr I'm going tomorrow. Your worth a lot to me too, because your human like me and feel the same way I do. Please please try and get out for a walk.

    X big hug

    • mami5
      mami5 lattifa7777

      Posted

      Hi, yes I'm on ad's, been for ages.  Will try phone CPN tomorrow, thank you. X
  • mami5
    mami5

    Posted

    Why is life so hard?  Found out today I can't have transport to continue my DBT therapy because it's not in an NHS building!!  It is held in a community building instead to minimise stigmatisation. It's just not fair.  Both psychologist and CPN say this therapy is the right one for me and want me to complete the course, but don't know how?  I can't afford to pay £54 a week to continue.
    • patricia44773
      patricia44773 mami5

      Posted

      Oh Mami, that is so terrible, surely there is some way round that.  I am so, so sorry.  £54 .....that's ridiculous, nobody could afford that.   Everything seems to be against you at the moment, but things will change, just hang on in there, you are doing your best.

      P

    • fee25
      fee25 mami5

      Posted

      I have heard many success stories from people attending DBT! It is absolutely ridiculous that they are not giving you simple help with transportation etc. I'm really sorry to hear about this mami. 

      I don't think they always manage to grasp how hard it is for people with depression to get out at all, let alone spend what little money we have on getting out to the places we should be entitled to for help! 

    • fee25
      fee25 lattifa7777

      Posted

      Dialectical Behavior Therapy, it's supposed to be the top category of CBT for people with a number of mental health issues (Bipolar especially). It's basically CBT (cognitive behaviourial therapy) but they have adapted it to meet the needs of people who experience very intense emotions. I haven't had it myself, but I have heard a lot about it.
    • lattifa7777
      lattifa7777 fee25

      Posted

      OK sounds good?? I'm still waiting for cbt, I hope it helps?
    • fee25
      fee25 lattifa7777

      Posted

      Hope you're not waiting too much longer! CBT is very helpful, having it myself at the moment and very glad I started going
    • lattifa7777
      lattifa7777 fee25

      Posted

      I need to ring them, I really hope it helps, I don't want it to make it worse
    • fee25
      fee25 lattifa7777

      Posted

      It can all feel a little overwhelming at times, it can be an emotional process but you have to work through the bad to reach the good. You will feel a big weight off your shoulders once you unload and they will help you to see the world from a different perspective, good luck with it Lattifa, I hope it helps you xx
    • mami5
      mami5 lattifa7777

      Posted

      Hi lattifa, DBT is a very intense therapy designed for those suffering with Borderline Personality Disorder, which I have.  It consists of 2hrs group therapy and 1hr one to one every week for a year.  It does contain some elements of CBT as fee25 said.  It is not an easy therapy to do, but my psychologist and CPN are adamant that it's the best therapy for me and I only hope I can continue with it.  Could be my life saver as it's suppose to give me skills to stop self harming and overdosing.

      Hope you get your CBT soon and that you find it helpful. xx

    • lattifa7777
      lattifa7777 mami5

      Posted

      Thanks mami, I really hope it does work God willing x
    • fee25
      fee25 lattifa7777

      Posted

      I'm not quite there yet, but my GP is referring me for specialist PTSD counselling for when I finish my current lot of CBT. It's a slow process I have to admit but just take things day by day and you will get there xx
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