Son seeking help for dad

Posted , 4 users are following.

Hey. Im gonna be straightforward with this one because I dont want to share a very long, weird story about my family. Lol. So basically my dad, who's 55yrs old works for a cleaning company at this time and his schedule is pretty whack for him. He works for only 4 hours and 30 mins. That's from 3am to 7:30am. And my mom doesnt seem to want to let him sleep on her bed that's supposed to be theirs. Yup pretty weird right? But the problem is, my dad is having a difficult time to get sleep by the time he is home. He sleeps in my room and on the floor. And I find it difficult now to move around and do stuff since he's there and I dont want to wake him but I dont really do important things because its my vacation. So like everytime he's sleeping I gotta be a ninja. I just dont want to tell him to sleep somewhere else because might get him depressed (i think he's basically depressed but just hiding it, ugh). But when he sleep, it seems to be very light because even though I'd be the best ninja as I can, he would still wake up and then have a hard time to sleep. Heck I probably wake him up by just breathing! I know the place to sleep might be a factor of his sleeping problems but he just tells me thats really how he is with his age, which I don't really know If it's true. I even told him to go see a doctor but I don't think he will. Still gonna try to convince him. I just want to know things from you guys for now on what he must do to get at least a good sleep. Maybe quit the job and get one that would be good for him? Pretty hard to find a job as an immigrant(plus old age) sheesh. Well thanks for reading! Hope you guys have something to say.

Ps. He snores occasionally too and Im pretty sure thats one thing that messes with his sleep

0 likes, 6 replies

6 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi

    I'm also a light sleeper and the slightest sound will wake me up until I found my life savior ie good pair of ear plugs that really help to block most of the sounds. Now I don't even know it when it's raining or thunderstorm outside.

    It really helps.

  • Posted

    I'm more concerned about you than about your Dad! You're obviously still quite young if you're living with your parents.

    It doesn't sound as if your Dad needs advice on how to sleep. No one can be expected to sleep well on the floor in a room where someone else is moving around - however ninja they are!

    Have you tried sitting down with your parents and talking about how all this makes you feel? I'm just wondering whether you have any brothers or sisters you can discuss it with as well. I'm really sorry for both you and your Dad. You're both obviously going through a hard time. But I think you're going to have to have this one out, difficult as that might be.

    • Posted

      Yeah I've tries sitting down with them but I just couldnt speak up in a way that they'd really listen. I also have a sister who's studying in another city so I thought it wont be a good idea to get her involved cuz it might cause her to fell like she has to go home. It's difficult to talk to them too cuz they're full of hate. All I hear from my dad is my mom's attitude, bad decisions that I don't even know if I should believe in. And all I hear from my mom is how bad my dad's lifestyle is. My mom has to work here in Canada btw for us to get here too and we were separated for 14 years. my dad, sis and I just got here last year. It's a pretty weird transition but gotta face it and probably do something about it. 

      aha I dont really want to go into full detail but thank you for your concern smile 

    • Posted

      Oh, you're really going through a bad time, though sadly you're not alone in that. Many young people have to struggle with their parents' problems. I know I did. My parents weren't immigrants, but I can promise you there are plenty of other problems in the world!

      I think it's really kind of you to protect your sister like that, but try not to take too much on your shoulders. I honestly think the only practical course of action is to keep your head down and do as well as you can with your studies till you're able to get away from home. That's what I did. I'm not suggesting you abandon your parents, of course. You'll always have some responsibilities towards them, but you're a separate person and you have to live your own life.

      I'm wondering whether there's anyone outside of the family you can at least talk to about this. A school or college counsellor maybe? I don't know what's available in Canada, but most countries have some kind of "kids line" you can call into anonymously, just to talk things over and get some practical advice relevant to your own area. Most of these lines will accept calls from people into their early 20s.

      I can't offer any practical suggestions as I'm on the other side of the world, but if you just want someone to talk to anonymously you're welcome to private message me whenever you like. Click on the envelope icon under my avatar. PMs on this site don't expose the email address of either party.

  • Posted

    He may have sleep Apnea and that can make it tough to get rest. He should see a sleep specialist about it. Make sure the sleep doctor is a good one, look up their credentials. There are a lot of bad sleep doctors out there.

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