Struggling dealing with physical intimacy and HS

Posted , 4 users are following.

I'm 22 years old and I've had HS since I was 7. It started in my groin before it spread to my chest. Then when was 14 I started getting them under my arms as well. I had an surgical excision on my left and right armpit when I was a teenager leaving to huge scars. I have recurring cysts and sinus tracts and typically get 4-6 cysts a month. (The HS also makes it difficult to shave because that'll usually cause me to get 2 or 3 cysts.)

I've put off most romantic opportunities because I'm afraid of the physical aspect of a relationship. However, I have a possible relationship on the horizon and I'm kind of terrified. I've had HS for what's essentially been my whole life, and it's really effected the way that I view myself. I only started really opening up about the physical extent of the disease with my close friends and family 2 years ago. I'm embarrassed to talk about it in detail. I feel like my entire body is covered in lesions, gross scars, and puckered and discolored skin. I don't want anyone to see that, let alone someone who I want to be in a relationship with.

I don't know when's a good time to bring this up in a relationship because I don't want to jump the gun and tell him too soon, but I also don't want to shock him when it looks like have an STD. 

0 likes, 3 replies

3 Replies

  • Posted

    I have those gross bumps and scares I tell my husband all the. Time I feel gross. And my doctor won't do anything except give me 8 different kinds of meds that don't.work right now I have 6 boils and in a lot of pain

  • Posted

    Every HS sufferer feels your pain and you are not alone. Not only the scarring and pain but the very bad malodor of it all is quite depressing and our quality of life index is very low. Remember though it is not contagious and you have to do your very best to find out how to control your particular stage of it. Everybody case is different, some have it worse than others. Also I feel the first person to come up with a dating site for HS sufferer' S to find other sufferers is going to do well. God speed & Happy Holidays

  • Posted

    Sorry your going threw this. Have you tried seeing a naturalist my daughter has hs she got tested for vitamins and minerals and it showed she was dairy intolerance and her magnesium was very low since addressing these and taking pro biotics she's in remmision. I hope this helps you .

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.