Struggling to get out and about again.

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Hello, I'm new here and just looking for some chat about similar experiences and some advice really. I've suffered with anxiety/panic disorder since I was about 13, alongside PMDD. I'm now 29. I had been managing very well for a while before christmas and finally felt like I was living a "normal" life for the first time in years! However, I moved house, started OU, got a new job, was commuting to my old job, and I burned myself out! On boxing day on the hour drive home I had a massive panic attack. Right in the middle of the journey I pulled the car over and just had a meltdown. I was right in between my home town and my new house and I didn't know what to do with myself. I managed to get to my new house eventually and ever since then I've really struggled to get back out driving. I'm signed off from work (bad timing as I was due to start my new job last month!) and I've been aiming to get back to the area of the new job to get the confidence up with driving that journey but I'm still struggling to get any further than about 5 miles down the road and I'm getting frustrated/worried that I might not be able to get any further!

Does anyone else have similar experiences? And, if so, do you have any advice for me?

Thank you so much x

1 like, 4 replies

4 Replies

  • Edited

    Hi Caitlin,

    I was once in a car accident, and then after that whenever I drive I get panic attacks. It is awful. I think once our minds does something, it keeps doing it and it's hard to break out of that loop. I tried going to therapy for this, although we addressed some other things and then I ran out of insurance money to cover my sessions. The main approach they would have done is slow exposure therapy. It can be as slow as first sitting in your car, not even driving, just being calm and relaxed. Then starting short drives around the block. And slowly building up from there. It sounds easier than actually doing it. But if you work with a good therapist, I know they can help. I was also diagnosed with moderate agorophobia, so I totally know the fear of not being able to go out and about. I'm thinking of trying anxiety meds, not just for this, but mostly some breathing issues I have been having Hope it helps you to know that I totally relate, and understand how debilitating this fear can be.

    • Posted

      Hiya, thank you for your reply!

      I'm so sorry you had to go through something like a car accident, that must have been awful and I can totally see why that would put you off the driving! Well done for working to overcome that fear though!

      I have been working with a therapist since last year thankfully and she has been great, although this dip in the last couple of months has really knocked my progress with her, we are gradually building it back up. We have been talking about the slow exposure therapy recently actually, and so even just sitting in the car - as you say - until it feels comfortable again, is a bit of progress isn't it!

      I tried meds a few years back and some worked, some made me feel a bit worse, it's all about finding the right ones for you I think. I came off meds completely for a good 3 or 4 years there but I was really struggling after this panic attack after christmas so I decided to give some slightly different ones a go, and I must say they have worked really well. I was always told by my doc that I couldn't take beta blockers because I'm asthmatic, but my new doctor here agreed to start me on small dose to see if it affected my breathing and it hasn't - thank goodness! So far so good! C x

  • Edited

    Hi Caitlin,

    I completely understand, many many years ago I had a panic attack while driving, it was such a terrifying experience that I didn't drive more than a couple of miles from my house for years and years.

    Some years ago I did group therapy and I adressed all my fears and phobias.

    Regarding the driving I will tell you how I did it. I gradually built up my confidence. I would do the couple of miles every single day until I felt confident about it, then 1 more mile or the next town, until I was ok with that....it was very important for me to have my phone on me and someone to call if I got very nervous. I would either pull over or call on hands-free. It was not a fast or easy process but I made it my priority because I needed to be able to drive.

    I now drive everywhere and I usually enjoy it but if I sometimes get a bit nervous I just breathe, talk on the phone or pull over for a few minutes.

    Let me know if you have any questions. You can do it x

    • Edited

      Thank you SO much for your reply and fantastic advice!

      I'm such a perfectionist in a lot of aspects of my life and I think what I've been doing is just "challenging myself" to do too much! Breaking it down into smaller journeys definitely sounds like more "bitesize" drives could be the way forward. I think as well, because driving has been the main priority to me for the period I've been off work, it's almost become like a chore? Like "ugh I NEED to go a drive" and I don't get the same buzz about it if I manage the journey.

      Thank you again for your'e encouragement and kind words. C x

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