Stuck in a rut I can't get out of, I've been here before.
Posted , 6 users are following.
Hi everyone,
I've been low many times before, but most recently (past 18 months) I've been the greatest I've ever been.
However, I've been having some health issues which may be fine but the doctors are doing check ups to find out the problem. This has sent me on an all time downer. A family member has had minor health issues too, which has plunged me further.
Today I noticed a friend I haven't spoken to for several months has deleted me on Facebook (I know that sounds very childish) but it's zapped my energy.
I have zero motivation and feel like utter crap. I want to feel like I did previously but feel like health checks are holding me back.
If anyone resonates with this or has tips to snap out of this, they would be much appreciated.
2 likes, 8 replies
Amanda1703 orangterry
Posted
Hi. You sound exactly how I have been feeling , can I ask are you the one always cheering everyone else up ...I have always been the one to do that as masked my depression , now it's out in the open I also have lost ( friends ) because they can't pass their problems onto me so now I am off no use ....the way I feel at the moment , good luck to them , who needs friend that suck the life out of you anyway ...
main priority is to look after yourself , that's what I am learning ..I'm very low , but I would rather be low an lonley than low than have poeple suck the life out of me .
true friends will understand ...
take care
amanda x
amanda35274 Amanda1703
Posted
Hi mandy from a fellow mandy/amanda. Omg never a truer post!!! I only now as im getting older am realising quality above quantity. Its as tho the leeches emotionally bleed u dry and move on to the next vulnerable victim when there's absolutely nothing left to give... im now happier in my own company & in the company of very few than ive ever been. I need to put a little of my needs at least equal to everyone elses . Well good on u sweetie :0) bigg hugg xx
Amanda1703 amanda35274
Posted
Hi fellow Mandy / Amanda
yes its good shaking of the life sucking leeches , sadly there is sometimes pangs of guilt as you have always put other people's feelings first ...but as you say .ro love others first you have to love yourself ..when you have been dargged up feeling worthless and continue to do so in your adult life , that's when the sharks surround you ..now I am defo allergic to certain fish lol ...it will be a hard slog , but we are worth it hey
big hug back ...and keep swimming 
xx
amanda35274 Amanda1703
Posted
Aww so well put. Yes the dragged up bit definately made a huge impact on my mental health. Although u try to push it back it shapes u to some extent. Its made me be a good mum although my illness tries to tell me otherwise when the dep anx & neg thoughts rear their ugly head xxx im allergic to some believe me xx keep fighting too. Much love x
maria_1963 amanda35274
Posted
Many of us can relate to all of you , you are there far more for them then they are for you , i had one who defriended me then blocked me on Facebook early last year , i was there for her the first few months of 2015 when she had troube at her work so she resigned ( probably before she was given the boot as a colleague made a complaint about her ) an i was there through job interviews , appointments , etc then when i needed the help of friends the last 6 months of that year due to health taking a turn for the worse she was never there for me then early last year she kept dropping hints for me to take one of her cats who wasn't getting on with her other 2 but i ignored it , had my own cat who was used to be a solo cat so she dropped me , i felt such a sense of relief an don't even feel any sadness . Fake Friend is what i called her . you all take care an put yourself first an your own health first xxx
amanda35274 maria_1963
Posted
Wow thanks maria this post is uplifting xx i had all this over & over until this recent bout kicked in, ( thankfully feeling bit better)! & i just thought im definately 100% happier with less ppl in my life. I know the good ones & ive no eagerness to go on any new coffee mornings etc to belong. Im where i want to be. Big hugs from my lovely staffie wen i need them, occasional cuppas with the few TRUE friends i trust & love.. & being the best mum i can be :0). Hugs to u maria & all of u on here xxx
borderriever orangterry
Posted
In my case I feel I can feel low for my condition I have suffered for many years although they have been good with me and I can in some ways control my health problems.
What gets me is if something else comes along and bites me on the B-M. I then need to reassess my positions, shrug my head, and try and accept my lot.
Of couse I do not know how old you are, I would however suggest you try and move on if the diagnosis proves something is around and you will need to mae a few changes. In my home my bungalow has been adapted to my disability so I am lucky, that of course makes no difference when my Doctors feel there is something else to consider
With me they have a tendacy to say well there is something more to concern yourself, get on with it, do you need more rails etc
I understand how you feel, the older we get the long jump seems longer and the jump needs more preparation
Try and make a positive if you have a negative, I will be with Pax as He plays on the beach tomorrow, that is positive, my negative is in the afternoon, I am off to the Dentist, I try very hard to put the negative in a dark deep hole and consider Pax running on the beach
BOB
Amanda1703 borderriever
Posted
Sounds similar as it's pain that I thought made me depressed , so I tried to overcome itv..I have had my home adapted ...constant pain and lack of sleep doesn't help , I understand that, I am in my early fifties and on,y the last couple of years has my childhood come back to haunt me ...these things I need to help to deal with...I want sure if the chronic pain made me more Depressed or if being depressed makes the pain harder to deal with
any way ..kind thoughts to you
I always try to be positive but lately that's not the case , I have been put on anti depressants ( I finally gave in ) 7 weeks into them and I am not crying constantly so that is a positive ...
have a lobely evening