Suicidal Feelings For About 48 Hours

Posted , 8 users are following.

Hello,

I found out my ex girlfriend is in love with her boss (I know him and his family really well) on Thursday and is having an affair with him.

She met me for coffee and told me this - I'm in bits.

I've had the worst summer ever as we split at the end of May as she told she was seeing someone else.

I haven't moved on at all.

I'm now in a very, very dark place and want to die.

My daughter is asleep next door and she is the only reason I am alive at this moment.

Does anybody have some advice?

I've been on the phone to the Samaritans this evening and they helped but it's only temporary.

Thanks

2 likes, 12 replies

Report / Delete

12 Replies

  • Posted

    Andy, please, an ex girlfriend is not as important as your daughter!  Get your priorities straight!  There are sooooo many women out there who would jump at the chance to make a life with you and your child.  Get out of that dark place fast.  Who else can you call??  You are going to have to get busy with some activities that is for sure.  Let the ex goooooo.  Do not meet up with your ex anymore.  Go in a new direction and let yourself be open to new people and fresh ideas.  Don't you know that "breaking up" or splitting, as you say, is something all of us in the world have in common??  You can get over it!  We all do!
    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hi Andy! Sorry to hear you're in such a dark place! I tend to get suicidal thoughts in the evenings and I combat them just by trying to be distracted, so I listen to relaxing music to help me sleep, or look at random things on Pintrest. I also have a quote stuck next to my bed which says "if you ever feel lke giving up, remember why you kept holding on", which in your case is your daughter. You're one step closer to freedom than you were yesterday. Emotions and feelings of hurt and sadness will go away eventually, it just takes time, but then I understand when you feel suicidal you just want the thoughts and feelings to go away ASAP! Just think, you didn't commit suicide yesterday - you beat those feelings, and you can do it again smile 
    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Dear Andy,

    I am so sorry to hear how much you are still suffering at the moment, it is really the worst feeling in the world... it is also hard because you must be trying very hard to hide your sadness from your daughter. As others have already said she has to be a priority for you now, as dreadful as you feel, imagine how your daughter would feel

    If she lost her daddy to suicide, that in itself would be terribly difficult to accept when she is older but as a young girl her life would never be the same again, dads all

    Of them, protect and cherish their children..

    Have you no close family or friends that you feel able to open up to? Also have you

    Told you doctor how difficult you are finding life at the present time ( time really

    Does heal, although you cannot imagine that at the moment ) please, please try to

    Get some help as soon as you can, for YOUR OWN SAKE, you really must try to end

    Or at least cushion your anguish....

    I wish you all the luck in the world, be kind to yourself ...Hugs to you, DEIRDRE x

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Sounds tough, but this is just a temporary blip. People do get over it and meet new partners. Sounds to me like you have a strong sense of responsibility towards your family and they care about you. Suicide leaves a void in other peoples lives, but your problem will get better. It would be such a tragic waste of life so I urge you to get some professional help. Imagine how you'd feel if you knew you'd meet somebody else tommorow and fall in love. You've still got plenty of time for that. Plus a relationship isn't everything, a person's happiness comes from within. Try looking into mindfulness and meditation. Meditation, when done properly, causes so much calm and happiness. I know this myself because Ive felt this. When you have a suicidal thought, try imagining putting it in a box and on a shelf, let it go like it's a cloud passing along the sky and out of sight. It's a very permanent solution and there's no reason to rush. Maybe put it off a few weeks. Tell a family member or your go exactly how you feel. Everything. You can make it!!!
    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hi Andy, you posted on the Anxiety forum also so i have replied to your post there, please read.
    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hello again,

    This morning at 6am, I called up my parents to cover for me as I drove myself to the hospital as I was on the verge of committing suicide.

    The hospital were great and even though I was very emotional and distressed, they were very sympathetic.

    I have to go back tomorrow for an appointment with a psychiatrist and will be an out-patient at my local mental health centre.

    My mum is staying with me which is great and it's been hard to be around my daughter today as I am having to pretend I am ok.

    5 years ago my ex wife (the mother of my daughter who I adored) left me for her boss. That was a horrible time as my ex wife was brutal and wouldn't stop until she saw me defeated.

    Roll on 5 years and my ex girlfriend has done EXACTLY the same thing with her boss so you can probably see and understand why I am upset.

    I am now 40 years old and my thoughts are very negative since Thursday.

    I have told my ex girlfriend I can't see her anymore and the stuff that is still at my house will be returned to her by my friend on Saturday ....she says she cares for me but doesn't love me anymore. I am crushed and crying my eyes out writing this fact.

    I'm not sure where my life is going really and at this moment, depression is bringing me down.

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Andy, I am glad you are receiving help and you have your mother to support you. You are doing the right thing by getting rid of the ex girlfriend out of your life, you would never be able to trust her again. Concentrate on your own mental health. You owe it to yourself and your daughter needs you. Forget women until you are in a better place. Counselling and talking therapies may help you, explore these tomorrow. Once you build your confidence and self esteem you will become stronger. Good luck for tomorrow. We are all here for you on this forum so keep in touch for support. 
      Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Thank you Elizabeth.
    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Dear Andy, I am so very sorry that your life feels so very sad at the moment, you did the right and courageous thing to go to the hospital to get help...

    Life must seem very bleak at the moment and every single minute of every single

    Day must be hard to get through...please do not give up hope, I am sure that you

    Cannot envisage ever feeling happy again, but I am really certain that you will and

    That you deserve to.

    Keep on reminding yourself that your daughter needs and loves you very much x

    And that her life would be devastated if you ever harmed yourself. You will be in my thoughts, please, please take care of yourself... very best wishes to you. Deirdre x

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Thank you Deirdre.

    It's certainly been an awful week.

    To be told by your ex girlfriend, who I have done everything with over the last 4 years (very intimately) that she is in love with a guy I know, is nothing more than

    the biggest kick in the balls ever.

    She told me she loved me at the beginning of May only to leave me 2 weeks later.

    To be honest I'm sick to death of worrying and thinking about her as I've ruined my summer....I've hated every minute of it as I don't eat, don't sleep but simply pine for her return.

    I'm devastated.....the girl I'm still in love with has told me to move on as she only cares for me now.

    Thanks again......I hope my life turns around from tomorrow.

    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Been there and dose hurt, but please don't go down that path been there also I joined op wth a couple of groups also I had 2 children to think of but I soon learned to love my self and really thought I was a good guy, I so learned that there also was women in a similar position, my life turned around and I re married very happy 20yrs plus.

    Live life Alexander.

    Report / Delete Reply

Join this discussion or start a new one?

New discussion Reply

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the forums to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the forums are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the forums is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.

newnav-down newnav-up