Supporting a depressed person

Posted , 4 users are following.

I think my boyfriend is depressed.

We've been together for just over a year, however now it is long distance, and in that time I've seen quite a big change I'm his behaviour. In the beginning her was always smiling and when I look at him now he is just miserable. He spends all of his time after work/weekends in his room and complains when anyone asks if he wants to go out. He always claims to be tired, even though he sleeps most of the time. When we talk he moans a lot and never says anything positive about anyone, nowadays this includes me.

I understand that he's been through a lot- he didn't have a very good childhood and both his parents are dead. He's said in the past that I'm the only one there for him and I feel as though can't let him down even though I have lots to deal with myself. I feel like he's dragging me down with him and don't know what I can do to help him when he doesn't seem to want my help.

Can anyone help me?

Also, should I tell him I think he is depressed?

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4 Replies

  • Posted


    would he go to GP if you suggested it,I know men feel embarrassed to think they might be depressed but it hits anybody young old rich or poor female or male,it has no boundaries.You must talk to family or friends for support.

    You can always come on here to have a rant we all understand,and somebody will always answer you.

    Take Care


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  • Posted

    42 YEAR old male, married for 16 years and when my wife came to me with that very statement, "I think you need some help I can't give you, I think you ae depressed or overwhelmed or something."  i thought she was nuts but after couple more weeks and gradually worsening  symptoms, I knew I had to do something.  I couldn't sleep at night, wanted to sleep in the day even at work, cried at drop of a hat, lost interest in everything including sex.  I think that might have been the deciding factor for her..  Maybe just a brush at the subject would help.  Tell him you want to be there for him but not sure you know what else to offer.  He may open up.  Good luck.  My gp did a lot for me and I was better in a coupld of monthes.  I still battle it now but I know how to tell when it starts to creep back up and know how to handle it a little better.  
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  • Posted

    Hi meg

    i do think you should tell him that you think he is depressed otherwise it will just get worse for him unfortunatly, it may be hard for you to do this but it's only for the best. Maybe get an appointment whith his GP and offer to go with him. It's a start anyway so see how it men find it hard to admit they are depressed, they see it as a weakness but that's not the case

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  • Posted

    Hi Meg,

    you are right. He is definitely depressed but you must not let it wear you out but try and let him do his thing.  Is he on any medication for this?  Maybe that would change the situation a little bit for the better.  But it will take time.


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