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Previously I have posted, about my intense guilt, sorrow and mourning that my Bipolar directly caused. Thank you for your responses and kind words. I attend all my appoinments, been med compliant. Still in excruciating depression, everyday. I can't wait to go to bed so the sadness can be lifted while I sleep. Tired of my shXXXy mental health and not a drop of a normal life has been extended. My aspirations are gone.
I told my doc after September, I am claiming my right to die.Told her of my plan and just need the details. Scared but really relieved.
Not a believer, tried it on my knees for years.
No one answered and if Jesus was such a good guy, he would want to help people. Just my heartfelt belief. For those that believe, I am happy you have comfort.
After divulging everything to my doc for over the past month, she said I will send you for CBT. Done that before, and a workbook is not the answer. She could of tried yet another round of different meds. She is a really nice lady, but has a heavy caseload and watches the clock alot.
My support worker of a year, has not been providing scheduled times to work with me.
Continual support, eventually erodes. I did talk to her but her retorte is she is busy and people with higher needs come first. My doc didn't like her response either. Looking for a new one but here it takes over and a half to get a new case manager.
Tired, frustrated, lonely and hopless. I call the distress center every week or so I can feel like I have friends.
Anyone else out there who would like to share?
Moderator comment: I have edited this post due to the swearing. These are open forums so as per the T&Cs please do not use offensive language in posts otherwise they may be deleted.
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