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Telling your sexual partners about LS

Posted , 4 users are following.

lauren33630
lauren33630

Hi all,

I've been seeing a man for a few months now. He lives in another city so we only see eachother when he visits every few weeks. We have had sex a few times now with no problem. When we first had sex my LS was in pretty good condition. I was using my emu oil down there and no really obvious white patches. Sex hurt a little only once - we didn't use lube and he is circumcised, so overall it was a success. I know in future we will have to invest in lube though.

My problem is that currently I am having a pretty bad flare up. I couldnt entertain the idea of sex atm because I am in torment down there however I am developing those small white patches in other areas and theyre now pretty obvious. And I hadnt told my sexual partner about it yet, because it wasnt a problem before. But now I feel like I am going to have to bring the topic up and this was something I was worried about upon diagnosis. He will be returning soon and I know I am going to have to bring the subject up with him, but obviously I have some reservations and worries.

Finding somebody who wanted to be with me still after me saying "Heeey... so i have this condition that is going to look pretty weird, probably make sex pretty difficult at some point and maybe eventually impossible one day. But im still a great catch!" I know I have more to offer a partner than just my vagina but I feel strongly that relationships need a positive and healthy sex life and I have to wonder how many people would walk into a relationship with LS. I know anybody who walks away isnt worth my time..but I think I need to hear some success stories of being accepted and maybe just some support incase I'm not! And maybe tips on how you told your sexual partner?

2 likes, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • kay70189
    kay70189 lauren33630

    Posted

    Hi I met my partner 4 years ago I have been struggling with LS for 6

    Months my partner has been wonderfully. There are some good

    Guys out there and I have read on other sites that couples have

    Managed to keep together just have to get creative. sex.

    It can work.

    • lauren33630
      lauren33630 kay70189

      Posted

      Thank you for sharing your experience kay.

      I am so pleased your partner is supportive in this and am encouraged myself not to let this interfere in my life.

  • suedm
    suedm lauren33630

    Posted

    Hi, as soon as.i was told about the diagnosisI told my sexual partner, he smiled and said, we will have to be careful won't we? The flare ups are not too bad, I ALWAYS have a moisturise on..DIPROBASE ... Prescribed for me... I wash everywhere with it and slap it on the undercarriage regularly, so a different lubrication isn't neede. However my gynae did say to use. ASTROGLYDE as it is non allergenic I believe. He is a very intelligent sensible man as well as being kind and gentle. Some friends are just TOO squeamish about any body function, so you need to know how your other hand will react. 

    Often as long as they enjoy being in an intimate relationship with you they know even bother to look at the nether regions. Obvious changes to the skin or open sores may well cause comment but variations in skin tone that mean so much to us means little to others...even if noticed. It is a good idea to say that you have fragile skin because of a stress related condition which is better treated gently

    good luck.. It is a Big Thing to us...perhaps not so big for others...stress is the biggest enemy...so don't get over worried. 

    • lauren33630
      lauren33630 suedm

      Posted

      Yes... i have noticed my condition is under best control when ive paid little attention to it. I am my own worst enemy in obsessing over bad things.

      Thank you for your kind words and your positive approach to this condition. I plan to tell him this weekend and he is a kind man so I am sure he will remain open minded and supportive.

  • jess07913
    jess07913 lauren33630

    Posted

    Hi Lauren, I was diagnosed with LS about a year into my relationship. I feel very lucky because my partner has been good about it. I keep lube close by and I take advantage of time when I'm feeling good. Unfortunately it has definitely lead to us having less sex overall because some days it's just way too sore.
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