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I will make this as short as possible. I'm still struggling with accepting this disease. I have very little support and frankly scared to death on how the rest of my life will be like. I have been in horrific pain for the last month and due to the lack of access to good caring medical professionals I am left pondering on the willingness I have to fight for what little I have in my life. I hate hearing the comments people feel obligated to express such as "it will be okay", "your not alone" "be positive", etc. I am a recovering drug addict (have years under my belt) so pain medication is a hard topic and I try my hardest to do without. I see nothing but a burden left to those I love. Not contemplating suicide at all but realize what this may sound like. Running away and being a burden on myself or others that may want to help is my struggle today. I don't want a life of pain, or feeling a burden to those I have left.
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