the most terrible depression i have had

i dotn know how to cope......i have appoitnment to the neurologist because now i have an issue with trigimenal (? in english) nerve , and i really feel bad, i dont know how to cope and go there, i think and dream every night, each time i have to go out as i ave no strengh to eat, to walk,and i dont know how i can cope with the appointment , i have to make a electromyogram but my eye is blurred i am dizzy , paralyzed on the right side and on top on that severe depression and ear issue....every thing at the same time, i dont want to go because i am physically exhausted....ptsd and so on , i am really emotionally exhausted, frightened, suffering , i am sorry for my post.....cymbalta is making my body more tired and off balance and right side more sleepy...just in the bed as suffering is too much. i dont know how can i have the strenght to cope really, eel alone, my mother is not very understanding and hyperactive, so hard to deal also with her anguish, alone no friend anymore, thank you

Myt not be the same but u have friends now. Here for u. Im going thru lots of physical problems which i know are affecting my mental health to a degree but trying to sort them one by one xxx thinking of u big hug ;0)) xxx

thank you amanda, yes having physical problems at the same time is terrible, depending on the personality and the strenght of each one...i try to sort them one by one but no improvement for the moment.....i wish i can take those nerves , the head in the dustbin and buy a new one!! have you had physical problems?

i wrote you back to your post....this is my second reply.....i have read your story ,  a part of the story you wrote..yes it is hard....i have been through many many difficult things also, i am 37 years old, had to fight alone, i am not a silly person, the only thing i can tell because i dont have self esteem although people tell me i have everything but i have been living very very hard life and being always a good person and welll educated.....yes going through pbs but i cant figure out really how i can have the strenght to cope and do things, as each little movement costs me energy as i have my head feels like i have been knocked down by a boxer, it does not leave me, so if it is physical or psychic i dont know, i even look miracles healing by God on the net on youtube just to dream a bit...so silly but....it is like i woke up in hell suddenly , i cant accept it because it is not palpable by anyone, it is so incredible if the psychic can break physical body, if so it is anguishing as we are alone in this .....willing to do....yes willing but.....just want to be cured of suffering, at least physical one .....so difficult a thing all these....

Hi ann yes, gastric reflux disease always worse when mentally unwell. Had gallstones that was agony for 18 months now its been removed so much better. Finally having relief from 23+yrs of migraines just now on a new drug regimen. Have a disc bulge & degenerative disease in the neck & lower back causing bouts of sciatica and trapped nerves in the arms from bone clusters in the neck. On top of that after 3 yrs of dental treatment root canals bridge put in & removed due to peridontal infections im still in the pain i was in after that & 2 extractions. They now think its tmj jaw disease/ prob after all. But hey ho if i was a horse they wuda shot me by now xxx

Anne

Sorry I have not got back sooner, I was out this morning and did not get your reply. I have read your two posts now.

If you are in Chronic Pain and you feel you are unable to cope ask your GP if Physio or a Pain Clinic may help you control your upleasent conditions. I have been in my condition now for over thirty years, I was retired from a very good job in 1987 and have not worked since, I am now pensioned and restricted what I  can do, I suffer Reactive Depression and associated Anxiety and take Narcotics to get through my days.

Anne there are ways and departments in the NHS that can help you, the Pain Clinic opened doors I had never known existed and that did help me accept my Pain and associated conditions. When we are ill and the condition lasts over a long period, we all need something positive to help us control all our negativity. Even a CPN can help you and you would be suprised what can be on offer to help you.

I was about your age when retired and it took the wind out of my sails

We had just got married and I had also been told my condition was genetic and it would be unadvisable to have children at least a triple wammey that really knocked me sideways. I had to move on and I began a new unsuccessful writing career

You doctor is there in partnership with you to keep you well and help you live your life. See if He can pick up on the internet and help you

Always Here

BOB

I at 43 bob have only just found a good dr for the 2nd time in my life its wonderful and has made an immense difference to my life in the last few months. Not all doctors are in partnership with us, maybe u have been lucky & for that im thankful.. hoping anne has the same as it makes wat feels hopeless possible. Good luck to u bob & anne xxx

you are a strong person....

thank you bob, i live  in france no such thing here! i have asked already, people are narrowminded in terms of helping people disabled, you have a hospital for pain and a psychiatric hospital for mental issues like in the 50s....a nurse comes everyday 10 min to talk and i have money to take taxi to go to doctors but no real people assisting you , i mean yes, a psychiatrist , a psychologue but not free , therapeutic flats are for really disabled people and you can wait two years to get one, it is more body sensations and exhaustion the issue, i am med sensitive one med is good for depression but far worse for my inner ear problems and so on.....people are here to help but for the moment no improvement...i am afraid i have asked th doc to chang from cymbalta to citalopram, afraid again to change meds, i have appointments for ear issues but with the med chang i have to delay it again , i wish i can cure depression and cope with other issues but each try is a failure....i dont know why , because i chang meds often, but what you i do if the meds is either too stimulating,either sleepy and  vertigo....th doc told me what is better for you but none of this two possibilities i like....so when i have a med i begin my vestibular rehab but after a while i cannot tolerat the med so i change so my inner ear is worsening each time i change and so on...they told me they never seen someone changing meds like this (antidepressant) .....thank you bob and amanda  for reading me, sorry , i rarely talk like this ...i needed to.

Wow i dont see myself as strong. Except for when im holding everything in so my daughter can rely on me. But thanks for saying so anne. My daughters in france now hun with school. Xx shes back tomorrow nite but ive not had to kp the pressure cooker of anxiety closed so its been a bit easier to cope although ive missed her lots xx

Anne

You need to talk, we are here

BOB

Here to listen anne xxx

thank you bob, i appreciate a lot peole like you . today go to the neuro, i developed a nevralgia on the face and eye, want to put my head on the wall as it makes my nerves and anxity to the roof, want to met God and shout at him from this cruelty....

thank you amanda, i need you two these lat days really to talk , i need it

Anne good luck with your appointment !!

Have a good chat at the Clinic

BOB

 

Aw bless u. Hope ur appt goes well xxx

thank you , i went to the neuro, explained everything, told me nothing, did an lectromyogram on the leg only although i complained about my eye and brain...i have to wait two months now for an MRI and i wait for an opthalmo in one month , want to see a neuroophtalmo hav to wait 6 months....So nothing new to cure this for the moment

The waiting lists are all endless at the moment xxx sending ya g.well hugs xx

yes ....a clinic doing every checking would be perfect

Ohh wouldnt it just xxx

Waiting times for appointments are terrible at this time and no-one needing help can do much about it Anne

At least you can come back here for a chat if needed

BOB

thank you Bob

Bobs right its bedlam just now xx kp chatting. Here for you xxx