The only reason I haven’t killed myself is because I don’t want to go to hell
Posted , 3 users are following.
I'm alone my parents are gone. my siblings have their own lives. i just lost my job. I don't know if i will have a place to live in the next few months. I don't want to be a burden. all I have are my pets but I wont even have them if i loose my home.
I know there are others that have it worse than me. I feel like I'm just whining.
I sometimes wish i would go to sleep and not wake up. maybe get some insulin and overdose. maybe even carbon monoxide poisoning.
Truth is.... the only reason i haven't done it is because i don't want to burn in hell.....
Honestly i dont even know why i posted this... It wont change anything!!!
0 likes, 3 replies
mai71267 jane62127
Edited
Hi Jane . When i am 16 , i was homeless but i had parents. Just that i dont want to go home because i thought they didnt treat me well enough.
One night , i was pick up by a guy older than me, yes, he r**** me.
I felt like i wanted to die. But i didnt . Instead i turn to my religion. If you have one, but did not practice, i guess now is a good time. I am not very religious, but i try and man, it did give me a lot of comfort.
Now im 28 , divorce with the most lovable 3 years old..
im here to chat if u ever need anyone. pls dun hurt yourself.
jane62127 mai71267
Edited
Im not a church person but no one really knows what happens when u die. I just dont want to risk not seeing my parents again if there really is life after death. I read u post and i feel guilty for feeling as i did since u have been through so much worse.
i know that wasnt your intent. i am just so tired. It sounds silly but my dogs and cat are my kids. they r the only other thing that keeps me going. every night i go to sleep hoping not to wake up and every morning i wake up disappointed that im still here.
mai71267 jane62127
Posted
Hi Jane. I believe distracting yourself during times you have those thoughts is essential.
I used to just lie down in bed and waited for my time. But i wasnt feeling better so i get up and try to do something else.
I know its easier said than done, but you have to be stronger.
I dont find it silly that your pets is dear to you. I have a cat, and i couldnt think my life without it too.
Look at how your pets will feel if you bring your thoughts forward.
I hope you feel better today.
xx