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First of all, I'm really struggling what to write. I keep writing things, then deleting it.
People always say to me I never smile and I always moan and similar things. I've kept the way I've properly felt to myself, until now. What's finally pushed me further is, I decided to start writing stuff on my phone to vent my feelings and that, and it ended up being over 2500 words long during which I broke down into full on crying, which is a first time for years. I've done this before, but never this long and only got a bit teary. I'm thinking going to my GP, because I can now say that the dentist mentioned depression could be a cause for my jaw discomfort, where as before I would have felt stupid to just say "I think I'm depressed" (I know stupid isn't the right word but yeah). But I still feel really selfish because I know there are people much worse off than me. And also, I feel like, now my exams are pretty much over (final one in a few hours, which I've hardly prepared for at all), that I'm just looking for a way out, when the reality is I've felt like this for quite a while now.
Another thing I feel like I should meantion is, a few years ago I had a bad break up which led to me doing something very stupid, that I regret massively. I had counselling for a while, but was never diagnosed with anything and that was that. And, reading it's genetic, one of my grandparents is/was depressed.
Also, I feel like people are going to judge me if it does turn out I am depressed, or something similar.
I've tried to keep it breif, but was wondering if anyone had anything to say to any of that? I know some stuff there is cliche from what I've read on other forums and things, but that's how I feel.
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