Thinking...

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I have been sober almost eleven months now.  I have worked hard at sobriety and I feel as if it was not as hard for me, due to the fact that I am a binge drinker by nature.  So I just took the binge out of my nature.  Recently, my mom has fallen ill and is in the hospital.  This has been the first time when I have really craved a beer.  I cannot seem to be able to rationlize me not having a beer.  This is all so new to me.  Crap...

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  • Posted

    I binge drink and I would find it near impossible to go that long without drinking so good for you I think after 11 months you are doing so well and have created a life without alcohol in it. Hope everything works out for you.
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    • Posted

      Thanks Star.  I never have needed alcohol every day but when I drank I loved to party.  I do not want that again but I wish I could get a drunk on every now and then lol.  It makes me that much adorable, in my mind anyway!  Ha!
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    • Posted

      Hi Matthew I know for sure I do not get anywhere close to adorable infact I notice the huge affect alcohol has on me while very drunk and its not attractive at all. I cant keep up proper conversation when I get like that. But now I want to stop the binging altogether. Im finding it really hard to find the motivation to stop I think I used to want to get THAT drunk to stop the anxiety it is however very temporary and some of the worst anxiety of my life has been the day following a binge. Id say the reason you are craving is due to extreme stress.Hope your mums ok and good luck to you.
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    • Posted

      Sorry I know I am not adorable when I consume alcohol.  I just try to mask my vunerability and overall anxiety with self deprecating humor.  And yes I am extremely afraid and that is why I want to drink.  And to tell you the truth, since I have quit drinking my panic attacks have ceased.  Just be good to yourself Star and all will fall into place.
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