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So, I've been suffering with anxiety on and for for years but always managed to keep it at bay, however 3 yrs ago it started to get worse then the back end of last year it began to really effect my life. Since Christmas I found myself isolating myself, frightened to make plans etc... In may I went to see my GP she prescribed me 20mg citalopram. I've never taken meds before and didn't realise the journey I was starting!
Wow! Weeks 1-2 hell, nausea, bad thoughts no appetite, slept like a log as I was taking it before bed. Week 3-4 started to feel slightly better, appetite returned slowly then weeks 5-6 came the shakes, nausea (being my main problem) bad thoughts again, anxiety, almost like a battle with myself. Doubting recovery, questioning if it had fine the right thing. Week 7-8 slightly better, depression fog lifting, more positive, anxiety moved from my tummy to my throat - a tightening sensation. The nausea easing but still anxious on a morning, be it not nearly as bad. Dr then told me I should be further on by now and wNted me to switch to taking it on a morning. Caused me to worry etc.. As she was going to take me off it if I didn't improve. So week 8-9 here we are, pounds better!!! Not 100% but happier in myself, functioning, eating, sleeping, working, seeing friends, much more positive. I've had 3 mornings with very little anxiety and my appetite has returned. (I've lost 2 stone!) I've being seeing a CBT therapist who has made me realise my anxiety is a rottin dirt bag that has stolen my life and I'm getting it back!! I've enrolled I a yoga class and using essential oils to help sleep and calmness is slowly returning - finally!!
I'm under no illusion that this is probably just the start of recovery and it will take time to be ME again but I'm not dreading it now, I'm going to embrace it.
This forum has and is amazing support, it gave me hope when all I felt was blackness. I thought I would post my story so others who are frightened about thier journey get comfort from mine. As I did from others!
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