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Tied up in my own problems and ignored my sons plea for help

Posted , 4 users are following.

julie79608
julie79608

i have huge problems at the moment and have hidden myself away but what I didn’t realise is that my son who I’ve always thought was so big and strong actually has mental health issues even worse than my own . For employment reasons he’s not going to be able to get the help he needs and I feel it’s totalky me fault he feels the way he does because all I’ve ever been is a failure and mentally unstable

1 like, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • sarah93199
    sarah93199 julie79608

    Posted

    I'm sorry you are feeling so bad at the moment, that both you and your son are suffering.

    You sound that you are carrying a lot of guilt and beating yourself up. Is this actually in any way helpful to your son?

    You can not help having your own problems. Sometimes when we are unwell all we can focus is on is what is going on in our head. This does not mean you in anyway caused your son's issues. Mental health problems tend to be very private, we often are not aware of others suffering unless they tell us. You are not a mind reader you could only know of his struggles if he told you. Instead of self blame try and be there for your son now. Hopefully you can support each other. You are lucky to have each other. Reach out to him today and take good care of yourself.

    • julie79608
      julie79608 sarah93199

      Posted

      I actually thought I had always hidden my illness but it seems I didn’t do a very good job. He can’t seek help he’s military so what do I do to help
  • sarah93199
    sarah93199 julie79608

    Posted

    It really isn't your fault. I'm sorry to hear that he isn't getting any help. I'm sorry I don't know anything about the military. I'm sorry I can't be of help.

  • wayne1962
    wayne1962 julie79608

    Posted

    Hi Julie - so the job is more important than your son's health? And he's in the military? Ever heard of the mental health problems that causes? See if he can get an Honorable Discharge if the military - with all the money it gets to train people to kill - can't be bothered to help him. You are not a failure - you are ill. So is he. 

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