Too late to start again

Posted , 9 users are following.

as ive mentioned in past posts ive just moved abroad my depression came back ten fold (i feel this my fault)

in trying to push through its really hard especially the mornings i feel i deserve bad for being so down

alot of my past mistakes have come back to haunt me including lost friends boyfriends

i believe this was all my fault

im 31 which i feel its too old to start again.. can my life be built back up again could i make new friends should i feel bad for the ones i lost was it my fault?

should i just end it all now is there any hope for someone my age?

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11 Replies

  • Posted

    There is always opportunity to rebuild, to start over and do things differently. You really aren't that old, so I wouldn't fear that. Depression always distorts reality. Even if you made definite mistakes in the past, you can still sincerely regret it and determine to move forward and live in a different way.

    I, personally, find it helpful to read or listen to things that are positive or encourage me to have hope in the future. I find articles and videos on JW.org. You might find it helpful, as well.

    Don't become so discouraged that you feel like giving up. Better times are ahead, they really are.

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  • Posted

    Hi Kelly,

    I'm 42 and this has been my longest struggle of almost 5 years. my friends have given up on me cause they would invite me to things and I would wait till pretty much the day. I have tried to tell them that every day is a different day for me. I can't make plans cause i also struggle with terrible insomnia so i just can't tell. my friends don't really get my depression and anxiety and are the "snap out of It" people. They haven't experienced it so they have no clue. some days I could sleep ALL day. I am gonna have to start over too but not till i am well enough to be social. I also have a very difficult time meeting people cause i am not living in my home town. So it's extremely hard and I only had really 3 people in my life anyways but as I said that they have pretty well given up now from not going to social things. It's like I have to not say the same thing or say it's my anxiety etc. So you are younger than me girl. I can still relate about starting over. I dont know how to give u any advice but wanted you to know that your not to old and that you are not alone.

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    • Posted

      my struggle is five years. i cannot make arrangements ahead as i dont know how bad my anxiety will be. dr gave me diazepam, it just masks things and is now addictive. have you been given any medical help that you think would work? Also, although i cant make arrangements, i can speak to someone if i meet in street, for a short while. i can text too. why cant dr fix this.

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    • Posted

      I feel the same. I'm really trying to make an effort and be more sociable because many years ago I used to have friends and I enjoyed having plans but now I don't like people and I don't like outdoors but then I get more depressed because I have no friends and no plans, never anything to look forward to although when I do have things planned my anxiety takes over & I completely change my mind & I don't want to attend. I hate my stupid mind I annoy myself so much!

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  • Posted

    Get a grip Kelly .the lost men were obviously not for you .you have to stop looking ,and one will pop up

    that will be yours. Life is just an ongoing adventure ,everything that happens to you ,is a step forward,a learning curve, that helps you grow ,Move on. look forward, lift your head up ,and see nice things ,and smile at everyone, It's amazing how many will smile back ..x

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  • Posted

    Hi too old at 31 to rebuild our life? Now I have heard it all! You are still very young and have plenty of time left yet to do or be anything you want to. Even if you were double your age there is still time left.

    I am confused why you feel it is your fault that your depression has come back? Why would you think that? Having depression is not a flaw or a fault in you you know and I am sure you are doing your best to start to recover.

    It's fruitless beating yourself up about the past as you can't alter it - all you can do is learn from it and move forward. Use the past as a springboard to move into your future using your past experiences to guide you. Learn from past mistakes and plan not to make them in the future and go ahead and live your life to the fullest. x

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  • Posted

    hi Kelly, if at 31 you can't rebuild your life, what hope is there for me at 45. I am still trying to rebuild mine after a few horrendous years of ill health, deaths, loss and lack of money. I have to rebuild my life, how i don't know. Fight for what you want otherwise your health will determine your life. Think if you want that? At 45 i have no children, no dad, no nanny, mum who lives close by, i also don't have my health. I'll swap your life for mine. THEN when you've had a day of my life then complain. Don't lie down and roll over!

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  • Posted

    There is no time limited on rebuilding or starting again. This is an ongoing battle so it's all about when YOU'RE ready. Sounds like you've had a lot going on so take each day at a time, don't think too far ahead & don't put too much pressure on yourself x

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    • Posted

      A tad negative outlook .kelly, try the positive outlook. that could be Sunny ,and full of people. , you just need to get out there and say HELLO. Everyone I know ,has gone through a bad, patch, it's life, So ,you are down a deep hole, and can't climb out !!!!! Grow your mental nails ,,,and claw your way back to the top. We have all done it.... It is very lonely down the hole, and,, no one can hear you ,So,

      get your climbing boots on.

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    • Posted

      Your mind will tell you that but you actually don't know what the future holds! That's why you should just go day by day not worry yourself about the future or the past. Stay focused on the present & don't tell yourself you're wrong because it's perfectly normal to feel how you do when you suffer from depression, it's impossible to see the positives but do whatever you need to get you through it and remember you're not alone xx

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