Tramadol Addiction
Posted , 11 users are following.
Hi guys, I'm new here and I have read a few threads about tramadol withdrawal/addiction. Wanted to share my story though because I've just today admitted EVERYTHING to my doctor and I feel so good to get it out! Elated even.
I was put on tramadol 4 years ago when I was 26. They dramatically improved nearly every aspect of my life, I can't lie. The energy they gave me, my depression completely gone. I lost a stone, got one mega promotion at work due to my increased motivation and energy.... I have always struggled with depression until these pills changed everything. I could finally cope with life and all the things it throws at you. Of course I steadily needed to increase my dose to feel the same effects and I started buying online so my doctors didn't see anything suspicious going on. Had them on steady repeat for the last 4 years, 200 x 50mg pills and to them they would last me months. In reality, I could eat that prescription in a week. My online habit costing me around £300 to £400 a month and after a year I no longer felt the need to increase my dose at all and was taking doses of around 1200mg a day spread out evenly with 400mg morning, then dinner, then evening. Yeah - that is a lot. Luckily I stayed on this dose for three years without dying.
I'm a single mum with a really good job, the main side effect at this dose was memory. Distinct lack of it. I was always worrying about my next lot of tablets not turning up and what would happen if I ran out. I tried to come off them about two years ago cold turkey, from 1200mg a day to 0mg. 7 days of pure hell on earth. I couldn't move, I struggled to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. Extreme dizziness, severe restless legs, no sleep, depression, anxiety, weird horrible brain zaps (I especially did not like those) and all in all, the most horrific experience I have ever had in my life. After 7 days and no let up, I took 100mg of tramadol and within 20 minutes, EVERYTHING was back to normal. During that week I had managed to get a prescription of 30/500 co-codamol, which basically did absolutely nothing to help at all. Trying to replace THAT much tramadol with another drug didn't have much effect. I had decided to come off them in the first place as my addiction was expensive, and needing pills to get through every day is not what a 28 year old should be doing. The withdrawals would hit me every morning and I would wake up feeling like hell until I took my first dose. 400mg later and superwoman would be back.
This time, the reason I'm coming off is much the same. I did not dare to do cold turkey this time, hoping that weening will work better, or at least make coming off them more bearable at the end. Also, while I was on holiday abroad a couple of months ago with my son, I forgot that I had taken a dose and took another. The inevitable happened and I had a seizure on a sunbed. Fortunately my son didn't see it and a nearby sunbathing doctor came to me. It was not a fun experience at all - I had no idea where I was when I woke up, people were talking to me and I had no idea why, it took me a full 30 mins to come back to Earth properly and realise everything that had happened. Very scary let me tell you. What if I had been driving in the car with my son? Doesn't bare thinking about.
So I have now managed to cut this dose down from 1200mg daily to 300mg daily, which im feeling really pleased about, I can't believe I'm even surviving, but I am! Next week I have to take it to 250mg for a week and we have agreed to cut it down by 50mg a week. Initially I didn't tell my doctor the truth, too ashamed about the amount I had been taking, but she is wonderful and supportive - she gave me a number to call for drug addiction too, which I then rang and made an appointment for Monday. I feel like I'm really making massive steps to get off this drug. I am a complete slave to it, and it has changed me as a person too. I'm no longer this outgoing person who wants to see friends, in truth I have spent the last few years with just Netflix being my friend, happily reclusive and just..... Me but 'dulled.' Nothing is as exciting as it should be, I can g
1 like, 17 replies
kate00000
Posted
Nothing is exciting as it should be - I can go on a rollercoaster and instead of getting that rush, I get off thinking 'ah that was nice!' I want to feel things normally again. If I've got depression problems, I need to on an antidepressant - NOT this stuff! I really hope people can relate to this who are trying to come off tramadol. No one really knows how bad I have got except the doctor now. And now you. I don't know how many people are taking huge doses like I was, but it seems that high or low dosage, this drug is a horror to get off of.
tonya34547 kate00000
Posted
If your still on this forum , since it's been a year , how do you feel? I have been off of tram 5 months , cold turkey. I started taking antidepressants which help a little about 3 months ago.
pmcg21 kate00000
Posted
sue45192 kate00000
Posted
I was also buying them on-line and up until yesterday I was taking 200mg of tramadol and over 600mg of codiene.
Today is the first day of my proper detox. I am sitting in bed waiting for the withdrawals to hit hard.
I am going to switch to 2mg subutex. I too am a single mum to a 16 year old and have a good (but stressful career). i have taken 10 days off work to do this. I just hope I can still be the same person without them.
Psychology i am not good right now, depressed I have OCD and I lost my mum 4 and half years ago - she was my best friend.
The tablets were shutting all of that out. I have to admit I'm terrified!
Good luck and let me know how you got on? Also i am on anti-depressents and find at the moment they are not helping but think I need to give them a chance by stopping the opiates.
kate00000 sue45192
Posted
I myself am in a situation with a man which is not ideal. I firmly believe that I would have got myself out of the relationship years ago had I let myself feel what I should be feeling and not using tramadol to cope with it and put up with it! As a result, I have only prolonged the situation further and had I allowed myself to feel what I should be feeling, maybe I would have moved on and met someone, settled down by now - not sat here alone most nights wondering how I'll feel when I'm off the trams! Sorry to hear about your mum, I know that taking these tablets will help you cope with the loss and make you feel able to carry on... Such a trickster this drug. Xx
scott31818 kate00000
Posted
I am very interested to know how you feel now that you are off the drug? Have the withdrawals went away?
I too loved the work life of being promoted, lots of energy, great enthusiasm etc but I often wondered would I get back to being like that if I didn't have the drug? It's not normal to need a drug to make us motivated surely?!
I feel as if tranadol has made me have less social life aswell as sometimes you just want to be alone etc.
Thanks hope you can help with this.
kate00000 scott31818
Posted
kate00000
Posted
It was a very hard day I can tell you! The people at this place were amazing. Still are now. I was in there 2 hours, a lot of tears but they made an arrangement with the dr who had treated me like a piece of crap earlier and I started taking 300mg a day, dropping by 50mg per week - but also made it flexible so if I struggled with a drop, I could stay on the same dose for another week while my body adjusted. Very very slowly, I got down to 150mg a day in December 2015. I was doing fine really, weekly sessions with the clinic really helped me stay focussed on the whole process and they were super caring and supportive - in hindsight my dr probably had to be firm with me to get me there, so I would sit up and understand the seriousness of the situation!
Unfortunately, I had quite a bad accident just after Christmas and smashed one of my bones to pieces. This has put a halt on my weening process as I have had numerous operations and am awaiting another one as I write now. I really don't fancy the pain of withdrawals on top of my injury so I am currently still taking 150mg a day. This is a small victory in itself I guess, from 1200mg to 150! And taking the weening process slowly was the biggest help to me to get to this point! I have put on a little weight, which downright sucks but other than that I have been able to carry on life as normal, if a little less motivated and enthusiastic about work than while on higher doses.
Really hoping the next op will be the one that stops the pain I am now from injury so I can continue to get off this drug. Part of me doesn't want to, but I'd love to know what life will be like without them. I don't get any effect from them at this low dose, but it keeps the withdrawals away - the mornings are still hard though, fuzzy head, heart racing, hungover feeling that only shifts about an hour after I take the first pill of the day. Reminds me I'm still dependant on these things and need to get off them.
Sweats5377 kate00000
Posted
So sorry to hear you've had another accident. I can understand why you wouldn't want to go through the withdrawals at this point.
I too have been through tramadal withdrawals, I did go cold turkey and it was a very hard time indeed, however, the majority of the symptoms lifted and were passed after roughly 5/6 days, then it was more about staying off them, while your body adjusts to life without them. It wasn't easy 3 weeks in I still get headaches which I believe were related and on top of that still didn't feel 100%. I just don't feel myself but I do feel much better and everyday becomes more and more positive.
We only have one life and I refuse to spend mine 'numbing' the experience.
I'm so happy that you have found help and going from the huge quantity to just 150mg a day is a real accomplishment. You should be pleased.
Anyway good luck.
I'll be keeping an eye on this forum so if you want to talk I'm here.
Sweatz
kate00000 Sweats5377
Posted
You are absolutely right about the numbing though. We are meant to feel what life throws at us weather we want to or not, feeling it makes us learn and make the right decisions - we only have one life and 5 years of mine have been numbed and coasted through, putting up with a bad situation quite easily but not solving the issue or able to move on from it.
I remember the week I spent off the drug in cold turkey, trying to take my mind off the WD's I got on my sons Games console and played COD... Something I had done many times before while on them.... I was nearly crying having to shoot people and the game basically overwhelmed me with emotion! Ok, so it was probably heightened by my ability to finally feel more, but it was quite an insight! I didn't like it at all...
Anyway, I really hope you find the strength to stay away from them. I know I will miss them when they are gone too, the crutch they give you is immeasurable - but we don't need it. Millions of people manage without it and we can too, I'm sure as time goes on you will miss them less and feel more and more like your old self.
Sweats5377 kate00000
Posted
I think what shocked me more is when I come off codeine a couple years ago I went through withdrawals then. I suffered for 4/5 days and the I was absolutely fine. On day 5 I had a sudden burst of motivation and I was cured. This time is so much different, I guess I expected it to be the same but it really hasn't been. Nothing can prepare you for withdrawals as it can effect people in very different ways. I think a big part of it is how long you've been on them. That doesn't mean it can't be done, just that it may be harder to remember what life was like before.
That's what I'm going through now i'm trying to remember what life was like before and now I have so much time I just don't know what to do with it all, it's not a bad thing I'm grateful I have time, I just get abit bored.
I was also an emotional wreck, crying at silly things on TV. Quite funny when I think about it now haha.
I duno, I'm sure you're right, I'm sure this is all just a part of what I have to go through to get better and I hope the mental demons go away soon.
Anyway thank you for the reply.
Sweatz
DreamSmoker kate00000
Posted
Sweats5377 DreamSmoker
Posted
First and foremost I mus congratulate you for getting through day 5, the withdrawal symptoms should hopefully start to get better day by day from now.
I am on day 18 and I believe all my issues to be psychological apart from the diorhea that still persists slightly. I can relate to dancing about to the music, music has been one of my biggest healers too.... Playing my favourite music instantly makes me feel better and gives motivation.
I sincerely hope you get some sleep tonight it plays a big part in getting you better. I remember I didn't sleep properly for about 4 days, halucinating and sweating, so horrible.
Anyway congratulations and welcome back to the old you, you can start to enjoy life again with your own feelings instead of relying on the fake ones the pills gave you.
Congratulations again, you must be so proud.
Sweatz
DreamSmoker Sweats5377
Posted
rob53972 kate00000
Posted
At the moment this feels impossible to get off these.
The only way to feel and act normal is to take them. I hate this addiction, I'd love to know why the doctors give us these pills when the addiction and being so dependant on them once you start them.
Yeh the pain goes... but the mental and physical pain to come off these things far outweigh
The original pain.
DreamSmoker rob53972
Posted
rob53972 DreamSmoker
Posted
I'm seeing my doctor in a weeks time.
Hopefully I will sit here in your position one day.
Well done you should be proud of yourself.