Understanding the Invisable

Posted , 3 users are following.

Thought I would re-post this from a year ago so that some of our newer posters can ponder it as it relates to many illnesses:

If you fibro folk can bear another thought on today's society!   Written after a comment from a friend - made me think how many folk out there are misunderstood.   Called No Spots.

No spots, no scars, no walking frame

No cast, no splints or bandages

And so she is not entitled to consideration or a kindly word

A shirker, hypochondriac.

Fatigued she said

We all get tired

It’s more than that she cried

I’m numb, exhausted, foggy brained

Blind in one eye.

But still no visible reason for her laziness

Believing her to be

A benefit cheat as the papers say

For all of us to see.

She limps sometimes and then forgets

Or so it seems to them

They have no comprehension 

One day fine another not to suit her they believe

If only they would take the time to see what is


And understand the nature of her ills

 but quick to judge they are

Their accusations and their gossip

Eventually reach her ears

She can take no more  and an

Overdose finds her on the floor.

Guilty neighbours rally round

If only we had known

We could have helped her cope they cried

And now, well what of now

 community rallied round and we find

A caring happy neighbourhood where

Side by side man and woman stand

United to the cause

To treat as would be treated one and all.

1 like, 6 replies

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    That is a very truthful poem Maggers! Yes and I have learned to not worry about what people may think. Ignorance is like a disease today. Empathy is what makes a person dig deeper. Sadly it is a quality that is lacking in this world. So I have learnt to accept my limitations and to give myself the attention and kindness I need. I have found that the less you attempt to explain, plead, react etc and the more you own your situation with dignity, the more people begin to respect you. People just do not want to hear our explanation of our condition. Even family members lack the empathy they should show. So forums like this one is lovely since we can encourage and substantiate our struggles. Take loving care of yourself Maggers! Maggie xx
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    • Posted

      Thank you Magpie.  We can all be guilty of judging others. How often do we see people parked in disabled parking spaces and see them get out of the car and appear to be "normal" whatever that is.  In fact they could have a terminal condition or one of the many "invisable" ailments that would entitle them to use that space. I try never to be that judgemental. Sometimes it's hard to be dignified when accused of "swinging the lead" and colleagues accuse one of not pulling one's weight.  Would be nice to be able to swop places even just for an hour and let them walk in our shoes. At least we can let our feelings out safely here.

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    • Posted

      Yes there is a great deal of unfairness. Women tend to compete in the workplace which is detrimental. I encourage you to just walk tall Maggers and own your condition. No explanations. Silence is very powerful girl. xx
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    • Posted

      Thanks really appreciate the support.  I have never ever made fibro a scapegoat for anything and I am not about to start now. However it would be nice if once in a while there could be some acknowledgement of the effort made to actually hold down a job when it takes more determination for us to do it. Bit like a swan looking completely calm and serene gliding on the pond but in fact they are paddling like crazy under the water!
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    • Posted

      Sometimes writing a letter to your boss can help Maggers. We express ourselves better that way when we are not face to face with someone. Short but to the point, explaining what you deal with each day, can perhaps begin a thought process where the person will realize your struggle. Even if there is no verbal acknowledgement sweetie, a letter can give them some needed insight. Just a thought. Have to run, doing some volunteer work this morning. All the best to you my dear! Never despair. Each day has its own challenges. xx
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