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I was put on mirtazapine in May 2013 after I was attacked by my brother a few months before. I was low, anxious and agoraphobic. I was desperate. I couldn't eat and didn't sleep for 6 months. I weighed around 6 stone and felt ill. I am so against meds but gave in and took them but I said I'd only take 7.5mg. It helped, I felt calmer because I could finally sleep. I worked on the agoraphobia, I slept and ate well. I gained a stone and felt really well. Then at the end of 2013 my family got intouch causing me intense fear and anxiety and I was forced to attend my mums wedding. My anxiety got too much for me having to see my brother there and I started feeling full of anxiety and intrusive thoughts. My GP suggested increasing to 15mg. I agreed so in December 2013 I increased. I have been on 15mg since.
I have always worried mirt didn't help me that much since being on the 15mg but I am much calmer and although I still have anxiety and agoraphobia on and off life is calmer and I cope better if family get intouch. I sleep so well and I love food. So in some ways I can see mirtazapine has helped. I'm now 8 stone and healthy bmi, I was so thin and frail before. I never slept and was an anxious wreck.
I became ill last summer with chronic fatigue and I was sure mirtazapine was a big reason, I feel tired all the time no matter what time I take it the night before, i suffer from unreality feelings and zombie feeling every day. My GP said it sounded like CFS and I have now been diagnosed with an underactive thyroid. I have been very unwell with the thyroid but i have wondered if mirt was a big fatigue cause. I'm taking thyroxine now for my thyroid and feeling much better up the fatigue issues carry on which I'm told is due to my general anxiety issues and thyroid causes fatigue. I didn't have crippling fatigue until last year so I've been told mirt is unlikely to be the cause.
In the last month I've had a setback with my anxiety. I go through stages of well periods where I feel much better and I'm out and about again then wham a setback hits. Usually if my family get in touch and I have to see them I get very stressed and anxious. The last year brought back my anxiety strong as I was so ill physically wjd bed bound a lot that I developed agoraphobia and social anxiety again too. It's been a huge shock and a tough year having health issues and a return in my anxiety. My anxiety in the last month hit hard and it has been quite physical which is unusual for me but put it down to Christmas and me wanting it perfect. I get anxious every December.
I sat talking to hubby about mirtazapine. After 3 years should u wean off. I'm on 15mg. Surely that's a long time and I should come off it and it's not helping me right now through this setback or this tough year should I be off it? My husband says he can see my point but when you think how bad I was 4 years ago he thinks it's helped me. I see his point completely as there was a time he couldn't work as I'd need him home and I was traumatised and anxious all day. Yes I'm in a setback now but it's not on the scale it was 4 years back. So yes mirt has helped in some ways but I also wonder was my brother attacking me enough to cause anxiety every single day since. I have agoraphobia which I work on, I could do appointments again etc then I got ill and wham I'm starting again on the exposures but I do get out each day, not alone but I'm working on it. I've social anxiety where I can't socialise at all since being poorly this year all linked in with the agoraphobia, and general anxiety. I had worked hard on the agoraphobia and social anxiety and overcame it a lot until last year when my health issues began and it all returned.
So right now I'm worried do I start to wean off or like my hubby thinks now isn't the right time and as he says there's no need to. I just worry it causes my general anxiety as I've had it daily since being on mirt; but yes I did have it daily before but since mirt I seemed to develop fears of everywhere and everything and I've not had 1 day off from it. Maybe I'm looking to blame mirt as that's easier but it's a worry I have hanging over me as I've not had 1 day off anxiety in a few years even when I've gone through better periods. I am in a setback right now with my anxiety, so maybe it's not the right time to wean off when I am already struggling with anxiety because I've heard withdrawal is hell and having anxiety moiety especially about health since being unwell it terrifies me.
I know I shouldn't put pressure on myself to come off it. I'm 37 and have plenty of time to wean off and right now why make my life harder but I worry it causes a lot of my fatigue and general anxiety. I never had anxiety this bad until the last few years. It used to be just health anxiety here and there but since I was attacked and put on mirt it became general all day and the added phobias which ok started before the mirt hence why I went on it but the general anxiety seems to be worse and daily. I have 3 kids and I plod on doing my best for them but get upset often I let them down having anxiety and now health issues. I can't due to health and agoraphobia do big days out, meals or cinema. All I could do again until I became ill last winter with the thyroid. I'm working on it again but get so fatigued still at times which then causes my anxiety. Since being ill this year my hubby takes them to any appointments and I feel I let them down. I still take care of them, take them to school, we go on holiday every summer an hour away... I beat myself up far too much.
Sorry this is one big ramble. I feel unsure what to do and I'm thinking right now is a silly time to even consider weaning off it.
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