Until Yesterday

Thanks Kombi. I am in work today trying to think of other things.

Indeed there is. I expect the cancer to be contained - PSA is only 8.3 and MRI did not reveal extension 'beyond the capsule'. Going for the CT scan next so fingers crossed.

Thanks for commenting.

Thanks Dudley. Didn't expect an 8. Hey ho, time to focus on treatments.

Regards

Hi David,  

If they are saying IMRT ... OR ... RP,  this is very good that they are saying  OR  and not ... AND.   The most important things now are a PMA  and Trusting Your Medical Team.  Oh yes ...  and of course eventually,  Humour.   (  Fake it until you can make it ! ).

If an RP can spare your * nerve at least one side if not both,  you should hopefully still be able to achieve a worthwhile erection / ejaculation;  although the latter will undoubtedly be dry.  Stressing your wish for that * to be so to your Uro can do nothing but help it become a reality.  Thereby sparing you one of the principle stressors in the whole scenario.

You are going to get through all of this well.  You have a keen intellect and you've got guts.  Also I have prayed that you will be sustained by the Holy Spirit through it all,  both now and beyond.

Take heart David and do not despair.  There is so much you can,  by your knowledge and your concern for others do for those less fortunate than yourself.  And in so doing,  you will remain calm and help to heal yourself.

I have also prayed  to God that He will bless you and keep you in his sight, now and forever.

Best Regards

Dudley

Thanks Dudley for your kind words - as ever. I have the scan today and I am really worried as I have been having pain in my bones for some time. Hopefully not related.

Thanks for the advice. I have not been offered any treatment other than RP or radiation but I will certainly look into it.

regards

Thanks Ken. I realise that I need to make a decision very soon I just haven't fully adjusted to the need to make one at all. This has happened so fast.

Will have the scan today and take it from there.

Thanks again.

David I wish you the best of luck with your scan results...fingers, toes, legs, arms and eyes crossed for you...

I can and did happen fast with me and I just went with my decisions after having the luck to have an extremely good and dedicated doctor...

Trust is the fragile link you will need to find...you will instinctively know when to trust those you meet along this journey...'Trust me when I say this!'...

Here's hoping you don't have to make any decisions and all is just an experience to remind us all to live life and have fun...

Dear David,

Wishing you the very best of results from your scan.  

I have a feeling of  certainty that the result will be a long siren,  sounding ' all clear',  

I cannot now  remember if I got the result of my scan the same day,  but I think not.   ( But then I had it done at a Private Establishment, on the Aussie NHS because the Hospital machine was booked out ).   So what  I'm trying to say is,  don't stress out if you don't get told for a few days.  

Like I say,   I believe you are going to be fine.  I remember you have cranked up your walking etal and I'd be very surprised if that wasn't the reason for your aches and pains.  None of us are getting any younger !

If they have not offered you any therapy other than Rad ... That's great. Thats terrific.  That's a real positive !  

They are now so good at targeting with gold seeds and then zapping the tumour,  that they KNOW they can kill it.  That's exactly what they did for me.  My Oncologist said to me ' Radiation is still the only thing that specifically kills cancer. It has been the most effective therapy for 50 years '.

Last Thursday week I had my 9 month review.   PSA now 1.2 (from10) ;  Prostate now smooth - was 50% indurate ( hard and nobbly ).  So I have gone from a recognition that I had ' a significant amount of disease' and ' moderately aggressive prostate cancer'  to now feeling,  thanks to God and my Medical Team, that I have been given a reprieve.   Even if the more nastily aggressive Son of Cancer comes back to get me later on,  I have nonetheless been blessed as of now,  with a worry- free window.

You will obtain the same.

In these few hours /days,  undoubtingly place your faith in God's Son  ' Come unto me ' He said.

Best Regards

Dudley

 

..and to Dudley. I am truly humbled that people care for others who live half a world away and who they will never meet. Thank you both.

You will be fine David ... don't sweat it.

Hello David !

And so,  Dear Boy ,  ...  How are you ?

Whilst wishing firstly to not intrude upon your privacy and secondly respecting that you are a considerable thinker ;  I and no doubts many,  many others are hopefully awaiting confirmation,  that your bone scan did not reveal any metastasis ?

But nonetheless it has been a heck of a ride for you David.  You poor thing,    your induction into Club Carcinoma has been such a swift one,  by-passing newbie and proceeding to Gold Membership !  But you will triumph.

Our thoughts and Prayers are with you.

Courage,  mon Ami,

With Kind Regards,

Dudley

Thanks for your post and your concern.

I haven't got my bone scan results yet (nearly two weeks now) so I guess that's a good thing. I am worried though, because for the last couple of years I have had pain in my pelvis / sciatica which seems to be getting worse - hopefully it's not related. To be honest, I'm in a bit of a state and avid internet research doesn't help much. I have an appointment with a surgeon in a couple of week but I don't much fancy that route. Everything seems grey at the moment and I need good news to lift my spirits. I guess that's the downside of being a 'considerable thinker'!

Thanks again for your concern and to all others on this forum. Will keep you posted!

 

Aaaah,  David ... That's NO GOOD.  You really need to lift out of what appears to be a negative/fatalistic frame of mind at the moment.

Though that's not to say that you do not have cause to feel a tad despondent,  during the phoney-war period which exists post-diagnosis and pre-treatment.

And naturally, you need comforting and support as of right now.  Of course,  you do.  And quite rightly so.

Yes,  it's a dirty curve ; rotten luck ;  and all the rest of the perceivable injustices.   But it has to be kept in perspective David.  It's not a bullet to the head,  a bomb blast,   or a Motorway pile-up.

Clinically,  I agree with you that a two weeks delay in advising the results of a scan portends well.  ( and if not then,  the money from your negligence claim will come in handy )   And ... being positive ...  if there is no metastasis,  then the pelvic/sciatic discomfort has got to be something else.  Maybe you are a potential candidate for an HR ?   ( Having been a runner all my life I've now had two TKR's - brilliant ops - and I can now even jog on the beach ).

David,  If you can try : to live just one day at a time; to give thanks for what you have now and for what you have had in your Life;  to appreciate the lives of Significant Others;  and the beauty of Nature ... I am confident you will begin to experience a feeling of calm acceptance,  which is both enormously strengthening and free of despair.

You will of course fight your disease.  We all do, whether we want to or not.  The body has its own will to live.  I heard someone on the radio say once that you  ' cannot fight Cancer ' and he didn't like to hear anyone say that,  because to his mind and due to the nature of the disease,  'fighting'  was not something that was possible.  At the time and before I ever knew I had cancer I sort of loosely agreed with his concept.  

But the reality is,  I have personally discovered,  one's  body fights the disease regardless of whether or not one is cognisant and fully engaged in the battle.   And to fight,  positivity is the most effective weapon your mind can bring to bear on the subject.

Alike to both yourself and Carl ( whom I hope will join this Forum to support you with his unique understanding and empathy ) ,   it was suggested to me by my Urologist that I'd had PC for twenty years.   Due to a misshapen gland my Uro was pretty sure mine had escaped the capsule and yet,  as of now,  there is no metastasis detectable on the scans.

So you see David,  I feel sure you are going to be O K.  In fact,   I'm absolutely positive you will be.

Therefore please take good heart and do not despair.  Personally I think beyond a certain point,  delving into the med journals is neither productive nor reassuring and I would recommend you give yourself a break and get out and live a little.

O K,   so here endeth,  the first and only lesson!

All the best David,

Dudley

 

Hello David,

I have been both wondering how you are and hoping,   that you have not had dire news ?

Please let us know how you have been faring,  when you feel up to it.

With Kind Regards

Dudley

Thanks Dudley. I have not heard, so I assume the news is good. I am seeing the surgeon on Monday so I assume he can confirm. My Dad was taken into hospital this week with a heart condition (bear with me, this is relevant). The doctor was happy to show me his test results. I could see nothing untoward but noticed his PSA went from 87 in March 14 to 433 in March 15 (he had a prostatectomy about 12 years ago). I asked why measures weren't being taken to address it and the doctor said that he refused treatment (didn't get on with hormone therapy). The point of all this is that the surgery didn't seem to do him any good - indeed it did him considerable harm as he never lost the catheter and it has given him problems over the years. It all adds to the uncertainty - I just wish there were a simple solution! Thanks for your support. The sun is shining and I am seeing my grandson this weekend so all is good. TTFN

Hello David,  In retrospect our lives were blessed,  weren't they.  And as we turn again now to look ahead the path is,  seemingly,  misty and vague.  

I sincerely hope your Father's condition will improve rapidly with Hospital care and that they shall soon have him well enough to return home to his loved ones.  As dire as his readings are,  he has had a long life and lived to be a Great Grandfather which is a blessing and something that now,  few of us can aspire to.  So thanks to God for that.   It's all  ( life that is ) relative isn't it?

Yes,  it seems most probable that your scans were clear and that you will receive the happy news about that on the 18th at which meeting,   you will  I assume be obliged to determine your own future.  Given your general antipathy towards intervention and the disturbing side-effects history of your Father,  which does explain the drive behind your arguments,  I would not be expecting you to proceed down the road towards an RP unless your Surgeon can convince you of both interim improvements in technique and a good track record.  Given that I now know of you somewhat better David,  I venture to say that I cannot see you ever easily receiving drastic intervention free from overt concern about the spectre of complications.  Whether not having surgery would send you down the hormone path without delay and whether you could tolerate it anyway also remains an hypothetical,   But for a few days more only,  

For my part my incontinence is inexorably and not imperceptibly, worsening. Would I therefore, if given the chance retrospectively to choose again,  decide to not have any treatment ?   No ... I'd still have it.  The thought of brain,  bone,  bladder and bowel cancer is worse and so putting off having to deal with any of that for as long as possible,  is worthwhile.

Just thinking ... it would be neat to have an avatar attend case management meetings in our stead, wouldn't it !?

Warm Regards,

Dudley 

 

I am sorry to hear that your incontinence is worsening. I understand that radiotherapy has delayed side-effects which reaches the nadir after about two years. Thereafter, it usually improves almost to the pre-treatment position . I am considering some form of radiology as I do not fancy surgery. Seeing the surgeon today to see if he can sell me his stuff. All the best!

Hello David,  how are you Dear Boy ... ?    

And hopefully,  your Father's condition has improved ?

... Well ... back to you.  I wonder what if anything,  your Urological Surgeon has been able to  ' sell ' you ?

I reflect that decisions are far and away the hardest part of treatment. Happily though the human condition is such that we having reached a decision become necessarily avowed,  that it is the best option for us.  This enables us to have the treatment at least,  with an un-pessimistic frame of mind.

No response is expected to this post David,  as the last thing you need is any influence or pressure.   But please be assured you and your Father are in my Church Community's thoughts and Prayers.

I hope you are enjoying the Spring sunshine and all that Life has to offer.

Go well David.

Best Regards

Dudley